Sunday, December 03, 2006



I have really been trying to stick to my diet - I promise you - I really have. Even yesterday, when some friends and I went to a concert at the Dormition Abbey and there was that ever-present Arab selling Arab Bagelach (than which, I promise you, there is no better smell and taste) - I just drank my water and sucked on my sugarless candies. Booor-ing! But I felt so virtuous - and thin.

So today - not only was I dieting - I was also working at my desk trying to clean up all my paperwork (I tell you - my papers have babies even while I sleep - sort of like wire hangers which seem to proliferate in the clothes closets overnight). My phone rang. My friend, Joey. "Do you want to go out to lunch?" "No" I said - "I'm doing my paperwork" - feeling very virtuous yet again. "OK - I'm bringing lunch to you - I found us a great treat."

And a short time later my doorbell rang. "Meals on Wheels" announced Joey. And then we went to town. Joey and I both keep kosher - at home. There was a time when we didn't keep kosher - so we know what non-kosher tastes like. Well - I still know what real non-kosher tastes like as I eat all kinds of "treyf" outside (things like bacon and prosciutto and shellfish). Joey doesn't.

So what did he bring for lunch? Kosher bacon. It's really veal - but - I swear - it tastes like bacon. We never even bothered to sit at the table. We just scarfed down bacon and mayonnaise sandwiches while standing over the sink. Not even with lettuce and tomato. And Joey - what a goyishe thing to do - he brought a loaf of white bread which he didn't even toast! I, of course, was semi-good and ate my sandwiches on seven-grain "leham kal" (diet bread). Toasted.

I'll tell you the truth - it was as good as any meal we eat at the fanciest restaurants around. And - there went the diet - again.

Stay Safe.

so you couldn't call and share??? i mean what are friends for??? enjoy enjoy i'm sitting here drooling with bacon
Dear Marallyn - Couldn't call because I was standing over the sink with my mouth full of "bacon" - but I WAS thinking of you. Not to worry - there's more "bacon" in the freezer.
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