Chik-Chat from Jerusalem

HELEN THOMAS IS PAST HER SELL-BY DATE

2010-06-06T21:20:00.003+03:00

Helen Thomas, the doyenne of the White House correspondents - the senior White House correspondent, in fact - made the most heinous remarks about Jews this weekend. Did anyone hear her? She said (and I paraphrase) "Jews do not belong in Israel - Israel is not theirs - they should go back to Poland or Germany -- or America -- where they belong".

Why is no one outraged? Why am I hearing nothing on the television? All I hear on TV is the talking heads still arguing the Flotilla mess. The same yada-yada-yada. The poor Palestinians - the fact that the Palestinians are "starving" in Gaza. Nothing, of course, about what Hamas has perpetrated upon Israel from Gaza.

Why is my email not jammed with people expressing their outrage? Why is this just allowed to pass?

Do you recall the white policeman in Boston who made an honest mistake and stopped a black man whom he thought was breaking into a house? President Obama was very quick to blame the policeman. Sure he was! And was so wrong that he had to invite both men to Washington to drink a beer and make shalom (peace).

Where is his outrage at the vitriol spewing from the mouth of Helen Thomas?

What would I do? Condemn her immediately. Have her issue an apology - although that's probable worth nothing. And have her removed - immediately - from attending any more White House press conferences or briefings.

It is clear that she is not a disinterested reporter without an agenda. Time to take her off the shelf - her sell-by date is long long past

Yalla, Bye.

"FREEDOM FLOTILLA"

2010-06-03T17:09:00.003+03:00

"Israel is guilty - until we are proven guilty". No - that is not a typo - go back and read that sentence again. "Israel is guilty - until we are proven guilty".

That, for me, was the highlight sentence in Bibi's address yesterday. It's what I have been saying for years. No matter what the problem - it's Israel's fault. I can't remember where it started - or if it's the punchline of a joke - but we always spoke of the "Elephant and the Jewish Problem". Doesn't matter what it is - it's our fault.

By the way - I don't know how you feel about FOX News in general or Glen Beck in particular - but he presented an absolutely outstanding, balanced report on Israel last night.

Yesterday the world was very quick to condemn Israel for the loss of lives during the attempt to stop the "Freedom Flotilla". Before the truth became known - before the film clips were shown all over the internet. It was our fault.

No matter that we asked for the ships to sail into Ashdod so we could check the cargo and then send it on to Gaza. No matter that there is a good, strong economy going on in Gaza. No matter that a good deal of the destruction in Gaza is because Hamas was hiding in - and shelling us from - civilian areas. No matter, no matter no matter.........

Those of you who are reading this in countries other than Israel - ask yourselves - what would your government do if, for example, a flotilla of ships approached New York Harbor with the intent of bringing in goods to destroy New York. Would you simply sit back and say - "B'vakasha (please) - come into our country - bring your contraband goods - and try to destroy us"? Or - would you do everything in your power to ensure that you continue to live?

Come on - you know the answer to that one.

Yalla, Bye.

ALL ALONE - YET AGAIN

2010-06-02T13:13:00.003+03:00

I won't even go into all the whys and wherefores of yesterday's action against the "Freedom Flotilla". The internet and the newspapers are filled with explanations and conjecture. Whether or not we were right or wrong - whether we botched the job or we were set up - here is why my soul is screaming.

I know - I know - I sound like a broken record. But I begged everyone I know not to vote for Obama. And how does he come into this equation? Because he is not our friend. Because he does not value us. Because he will bow down to the Saudi King - extend his hand in "friendship" to Iran - embarrass our Prime Minister when he came to the States - make very clear that he thinks we are always wrong, wrong, wrong - and has, in the process, implicitly given the world permission to delegitimatize us.

We are sitting in our tiny, miniscule country - we can drive from one end to the other in a matter of hours - we are surrounded by countries which would like to see our demise - and we are feeling very alone.

I cannot imagine what has happened to the American Jews. Has everyone forgotton so quickly? I cannot understand what caused the majority of American Jewery to vote for Obama in the first place - a man who - it was very clear - is not a friend of whites or Jews. Too strong a statement? I don't think so.

We are in a very vulnerable position - both physically and emotionally. Iran has made it very clear that its avowed purpose is to wipe us off the face of the earth. There are many of us who think we are on the brink of a war. We can no longer count on our former friends and allies - the Americans - to come to our aid.

I cannot - I will not - believe that Israel will ever cease to exist. We are not warmongers. We want to live in peace. Why will the world not let us?

AND SO IT GOES

2010-03-14T08:34:00.003+02:00

I simply do not know what happened to this year. When Channukah arrived I wasn't ready for it. When Purim arrived I wasn't ready for that, either. And now - two weeks from tomorrow Pesach will arrive.

It seems to me as if I just wrote about getting ready for Pesach - was it really almost a year ago? Although last year I didn't do the Seder at home - I celebrated with friends in Ramat HaSharon. This year, however, the Seder is back at my house. As I say each time Pesach arrives - how will I ever get everything ready on time? (To tell the truth - I say the same thing on Thanksgiving and Rosh HaShana.)

Anyway - I'm now at the point where even my lists have lists. What to cook - what to buy - how will I organize the menu this year. And as an added little goody - I'm also having people in for dinner on the Friday after the Seder. That's two big dinner parties in the same week - with the addition of having to do "special" foods for the Seder.

One year my friend, Devora, and I decided to get creative for Pesach. No gefilte fish for us - we'd do poached salmon. No chicken soup with kneidlach (matzoh balls) - we'd do some kind of a thick creamy soup. When her husband overheard us planning the new "modern" Seder he was appalled - what, no traditional foods? No gefilte fish? No kneidlach? And so that idea was shelved and we went back to our old traditional Seder - which everyone adored and which I will do again this year - and as I do almost every year.

I haven't finalized the menu yet for the two dinners but you can be sure the Seder will include the traditional hard boiled eggs, chicken soup and kneidlach, gefilte fish, chopped liver and the main course - whenever I make up my mind what the main course will be. All homemade - of course - and all very Ashkenazi traditional.

So you can imagine just how appalled I was when I got an email from my niece asking for my advice on making gefilte fish from salmon. SALMON??? You don't make gefilte fish from salmon. You make gravlax, you smoke it, you poach it, you bake it, you broil it - but you do not make traditional Jewish gefilte fish from salmon.

But - it's possible that I can be wrong. So I did an informal survey - and there was not one person who thought that the idea of salmon gefilte fish was a good idea. And my friends are mostly foodies - most of whom will try anything and every thing edible, at least once. Salmon gefilte fish? A big thumbs down.

In the States we have different fish than we have here. In New York I made the fish from buffle (do not even ask me what that is, I have no idea - it's just buffle), white fish and pike. Here I use carpion (carp) and either cassif (sliver carp) or bouri (grey mullet) - whatever is available. But never ever salmon.

Gefilte fish was invented, if you will, to stretch one fish to feed many people. By removing the fish from the bones and grinding it with "fillers" - onions, matzoh meal, eggs, carrots, almonds, chopped hard boiled eggs - indeed, any and/or all of the aforementioned - one fish can feed many people.
By the way - "we", meaning Russian Jews, don't use the almonds - that's a particularly German addition.

So - on I go now. Have to make more lists, do some marketing, do some pre-preparing - and hope I am all ready for the Seder. Will let you know how it goes.

Pesach Sameach - a Happy Pesach to you all.

Yalla, Bye.

HI - HERE I AM AGAIN

2010-02-21T11:18:00.005+02:00

As my friend, Arthur, reminded me when he called me from Canada last week - I haven't written since December 24th - almost two months. And its not as if I had nothing to say - I always have something to say. My excuse? Just lazy, I suppose. OK - back to work.

One of the last times I wrote I told you I was on a diet. And then the last time I wrote I told you about the glorious new / old restaurant "The Rotisserie" - where we had a wonderful lunch. So - how can I be on a diet and still go out for glorious lunches and dinners? Not to mention breakfasts. My dears - you won't believe this - but it's true. I am still on my diet - have not cheated even once - and so far I have lost 10 kilos - that's 22 pounds. Are you impressed?

And - I go to the gym religiously. So aside from the pounds I'm also losing inches...or centimeters if that's the way you are counting.

My partner-in-crime, Marallyn, is also on the same diet and going to the same dietician. But, instead of going to the gym she goes swimming. She's my very dear friend and I would do almost anything for her - but I will not go to the pool with her - and that's final.

You have to understand - I know how to swim. After all, I was sent away to summer camp for the first time when I was seven years old - and only stopped going when I was already in college. (I used to think my parents hated me and that's why they sent me away every summer. I had no idea what a financial stretch it was for them to send both me and my brother to sleep-away-camp for two months each year.) And in camp you learn how to swim. But I digress.

To me going to the pool means lying under a tree or an umbrella, with an ice cold gin and tonic to hand. And when I go into the water I like to sit on my floating chaise longue, with the above-mentioned gin and tonic and a good book to read.

So - whether pool or gym - we're both doing what we have to. Dieting and exercising - and beginning to look great. And we all help each other. Riva gave me a discount coupon to the gym and I introduced her and her husband to the dietician. We are really all feeling so virtuous.

And while I'm on the subject of virtuous - how's that for a segue - I have to mention Tiger Woods' "apology to the world" the other day. You could almost see him polishing the halo above his head - he was feeling so virtuous about confessing his sins and apologizing - many many times.

I "have to" mention his apology because listening to the TV and watching them play the clip over and over is making me ill. I'm tired of listening to him....and watching him grovel...and, incidentally, announce that he is going back to playing professional golf. Truth to tell - I don't really care what he did. He owes me nothing. Certainly not an apology. Did having girlfriends make him a lesser golfer? Did Monica Lewinsky make Bill Clinton a less-good president? Same with John Edwards and Elliot Spitzer and what's-his-name Sanford - that's their problem to work out with their wives and families.

Did their exploits make me think less of them as upstanding individuals? You betcha - to quote Sarah Palin - but apologize to me? Not necessary. However - I must say how proud I am of his wife, Elin - who did not stand next to him. He did her a dirty - whether in front of the world or privately, it doesn't matter...what does matter is that she wasn't there to condone his bad behavior. You go, girl.

Yalla, Bye.

AN EXCITING NEW RESTAURANT

2009-12-24T11:07:00.006+02:00

Once upon a time, a long time ago, in the beautiful city of Jerusalem, there opened a restaurant called "La Rotisserie" at the Notre Dame Monastery.

It was such a long time ago that there weren't many world-class restaurants in Jerusalem. True - there were many restaurants in Jerusalem, but only a small handful which were really "must eat at places".

"La Rotisserie" stayed open for several years. The food was excellent, the service all you could hope for, the place welcoming - in short, a restaurant we often visited.

Then the intifadas came. People were afraid to go into East Jerusalem and almost all of the restaurants which catered to the Israeli Jewish customers and to the tourists went out of business. Among them "La Rotisserie".

Then, a few weeks ago there appeared in the weekend edition of HaAretz a short article by Ronit Vered about "La Rotisserie" which had just re-opened under the aegis of a Cuban/Spanish chef by the name of Rodrigo Gonzalez-Elias.

According to Ms. Vered "...the name Elias appears in population registries in the Caribbean as far back as the 17th century - an apparent remnant of a Jewish forefather who converted to Christianity, along with others in the group referred to as Marranos. After Castro came to power, the family scattered all over the world. Elias himself grew up in Madrid....." While Ms. Vered states in the article that Elias was born in Cuba, he told us that he was actually born in Pennsylvania(!).

To further quote Ms. Vered, "The result sounds something of a joke: a restaurant in premises owned by the Vatican, in the Holy City, run by a Christian Spanish chef of Cuban background, who is decended from a Marrano family".

Yesterday, my great foodie friends, Yoav and Ernesto, treated me to lunch at "La Rotisserie". And what a lunch it was. Ernesto suggested that we each order different starters and entrees - and share. ( By the way - don't you just hate people who won't share their food?)

And so we shared - mostly sea food and fish dishes because that's what we like and it's something not easy to come by in Jerusalem. We ordered one roast chicken dish which piqued Yoav's taste buds because it came stuffed with white truffles - and was partnered with grilled asparagus and a stuffed zucchini blossom. Can you describe chicken as ethereal?

We ate monk fish - the first time ever that I've seen this in Israel - sided with rice cooked in squid ink. Monk fish is sometimes described as "the poor man's lobster" because it has the same taste and texture as a lobster tail. And even though it is a fish as opposed to sea food - it isn't kosher - it has no scales. We had several shrimp dishes - all cooked to perfection - and each beautifully garnished. And we had pulpo (octopus) which was absolutely tender - which isn't always the case with octopus - sided with roasted potato cubes.

The desserts were imaginative and whimsically named and presented. We only ordered two desserts as I'm not much of a dessert person - but I tasted, you can be sure. Soooo good.

For those who are willing to eat in a non-kosher restaurant but not eat shellfish - there are many other offerings - such as a beetroot risotto, meats and fish. I can't imagine that the other dishes offered are any less wonderful than the ones we ate.

Now - here's what you have to do. Although the restaurant is still called "La Rotisserie" - it isn't a grill-restaurant at all. For some technical reason having to do with the Church - they are prohibited from changing the name of the restaurant that once existed in that space. Also - and more important - the Church prohibits them from advertising a commercial enterprise. So you will see no advertisements for the restaurants. You have to help advertise this restaurant by word-of-mouth.

At the moment the restaurant is not filled to capacity. I want them to succeed - when you eat there you will also want them to succeed. If you don't want to go for a full dinner - go on a Saturday evening to the bar - have a few drinks and order a selection of tapas (those little h'ors d'oeuvres that are famously served in Spain). It sounds like great fun.

Their phone number is 02-6279114. Go - enjoy - and tell me how you liked it. In fact, if you call me I'll go along with you. Can't wait to eat there again.

Yalla, Bye.

I'M GOING TO THE GYM

2009-12-06T16:53:00.003+02:00

"I'm going to the gym." Five words that I never, ever thought would fall from my lips.

They not only fell from my lips - I'm really going to the gym. I can't believe I wrote that. "I'm going to the gym." But today was the second day that I went. What a way to begin the week.

I don't actually understand women who say - happily -"I go to the gym every day." - "I feel so good when I go to the gym." - "Going to the gym is an important part of my routine." Are they crazy?

But - not only am I going to the gym - and plan to do so on a regular basis.... I've signed up for a whole year. Am I crazy?

I'll tell you what's happening. I always write to you about the wonderful dinners I cook at home for my friends. I always tell you about all the restaurants I eat at - the new ones that have to be tried out and the old stand-bys that I love to re-visit. I tell you about the delicious recipes I've experimented with. I tell you about the friends I visit and the affairs I go to. Do you notice a common theme here? Everything has to do with eating. And eating puts weight on you. Duh!

So - the time has come. It's not that I'm fat - but I'm no longer slim either. My clothes still fit me - but only just. And so I've decided that the time has come to get back in shape. Of course, as my partner-in-crime, Marallyn, says - "Round is a shape, too."

Recently my friend, Riva, began going to "our" gym - notice how I'm already a partner? - and she looks marvelous. She hasn't lost any actual pounds but she's looking firm and terrific. (She's also one of my good eating and cooking buddies.) And she's also a good enough friend that she brought me an introductory discount coupon to the gym - a nice way of saying, without actually saying it, that I need to do something serious.

Then my friend, Joey, went to a dietician, lost heaps of weight (he's also one of my serious eating and cooking buddies) - and looks great.

Last week I began with the gym. Tomorrow morning I'm going to Joey's dietician! But - I'm not doing all of this all alone. My partner-in-crime is going along with me. We eat together - we diet together. That's only fair. Once a year Marallyn and I go on a diet - which is our only saving grace in the weight department. That keeps us from actually getting fat. But the truth is that we've lost - and gained - the same fifteen pounds year after year. Enough already. Her son, Joe College, said to her "Why do you go on that diet each year? It doesn't work." It works - we don't. Slowly, slowly we go back to our old eating habits.

Wish us luck. I'll keep you up to date from time to time. By this time next year I expect us to be svelte and gorgeous. Well - we're already gorgeous - it's svelte we want to be.

Lest you think that I've lost my mind entirely --- I just cut an article out of the weekend paper about a new restaurant that opened here in Jerusalem - I'll have to try it. I'll tell you about that, too.

Yalla, Bye.

TO THE TURKEY WHO GAVE HIS LIFE FOR US

2009-11-29T11:32:00.007+02:00

We couldn't have done it without the turkey - or turkeys in fact - because there was more than one. I said "the turkey who gave his life" but Myra says I had female turkeys - I don't know how to tell the difference, to tell you the truth - but the turkeys were delicious - absolutely juicy and tender and tasty. No false modesty here, you notice.

Which is by was of saying that the "usual suspects" got together, once again, to eat, fress (Yiddish for really really eat - pack it away), laugh, tell stories, have fun and eat some more.

There were twelve of us - only two from America - but it didn't matter - good food is good food - and Thanksgiving is a wonderful excuse to pull out all the stops no matter what country you come from.

I, literally, cooked and prepared for three days - in addition to the marketing and some things I made weeks ago and put into the freezer - which I told you about before. (I keep telling you to read my blogs.)

So here's the menu - roast turkey, bread and chestnut stuffing, gravy, corn pudding, mashed sweet potatoes with glazed carrots and pumpkin, mashed white potatoes with gribenes (the well-fried onions and bits of skin that you get when you make schmaltz {rendered chicken fat}), homemade cranberry sauce, homemade cranberry relish, brussels sprouts with smoked goose breast (instead of pancetta - remember, I keep kosher), sauteed long thin green beans, lemon meringue pie, pecan pie and apple crumble. And Arnon's gorgeous wine - lots of it.

And in the interest of full disclosure I also served jellied cranberry sauce from a can! Can you imagine - in my house? Jellied cranberry sauce from a can? But - I have two friends who don't like "bits" in their cranberry sauce and - gracious hostess that I am (again, no false modesty) - I try to serve what my guests like.

We ate for hours! And I also put out the bones for people to gnaw on - just like home. And - just like home - everyone took home "care packages". Don't you just love leftovers?

Of course, I never made it to the hairdresser the next day - I couldn't get up after having gone to bed at 2:30 in the morning. I did, however, manage to get up in time to meet Marallyn for our usual "written-in-stone" Friday morning breakfast. I actually don't know where I put the food - we were still so full from Thursday night - but breakfast is breakfast on Friday morning.

And tomorrow two of my friends who were invited but couldn't come because they were still abroad will come for dinner to eat leftovers. Yes - leftovers from Thanksgiving. Ernesto called me to say they were coming home on Monday and did I think there would still be some leftovers - what a question. And so tomorrow will be a small replay of Thursday evening. Except for the lemon meringue and pecan pies. The two pieces that were left went home in someone's care package. Not to worry - we'll still have apple crumble.

Hope your Thanksgiving was as much fun as mine.

Yalla, Bye.

HERE WE GO AGAIN

2009-11-23T18:43:00.003+02:00

By now even my lists have lists. That's right - you guessed it - this week is Thanksgiving and I'm in my usual Thanksgiving mode. Make lists - shop - cook - cook - roast - bake - make more lists.....

To bring you up to date - all the guests have been invited - and all have accepted. Too bad I only have room for twelve at my table. As long as I'm cooking - what's the difference if I cook for twelve or twenty. But twelve it is.

I did all the marketing today - except for the turkey which has been ordered and can only be picked up on Thursday morning. And some of the preparing has actually been done. The tseer (broth, stock) for the gravy was made weeks ago and is in the freezer. The mushrooms and onions and celery have been chopped and satueed and are in the freezer, too, waiting for their chance to become part of the stuffing.

The bread is getting stale - waiting to be cubed and toasted in the oven - to become the basis of the stuffing - along with the chestnuts and vegetables. It will smell like Thanksgiving when the stuffing is in the oven and the smell of sage wafts through the house.

Tomorrow - although it will only be Tuesday - I'll open the table - iron the cloth - and set the table. I hate to have to iron the cloth at the last minute - I know I'm a bit anal - but I can't stand a table cloth with "closet folds" in it - so who's perfect? I suppose there are worse things to be than neurotic about creases. So that gets the table out of the way.

I'll also make the cranberry sauce and cranberry relish tomorrow. My friend, Riva, is the star of this year's dinner. Just as I was comforting myself that it wasn't really so bad to serve tinned cranberry sauce - and that no one would really mind, anyway - TA DA! Riva announced that she had to go Canada for a week - and asked if I wanted her to bring me back fresh cranberries. You mean you didn't hear me shriek? With joy? (It takes so little to make me happy these days.) And true to her word - she brought me fresh cranberries.

On Thursday Myra will perform her "usual" Thanksgiving chore - which she volunteers to do you must understand - I do not force her into this terrible job. Myra will show up early on the morning of Thanksgiving - just after I've gotten home with the turkey(s) - and pluck the bird(s) clean. This is not North America - our poultry does not arrive at the market absolutely denuded and featherless. Actually, I've learned to think of the feathers as just a bit more protein - but even I have limits.

The reason for "turkey(s)" - is that I won't know until Thursday if I will get one turkey or two. ( And you thought life here was easy?) There is no such thing as a "normal" North American-type turkey of 18 or 20 or 24 pounds. So - I'll either have one 8 kilo bird (17.6 pounds) or two 5 kilo birds (each bird weighing 11 pounds) Not to worry - I have an enormous oven which holds two small turkeys side by side. In either case there will be enough food. I always worry in case there isn't enough food - if there's not food left over then there wasn't enough!

Besides - I already have orders for "Care Packages" - you know - little packages of food from the dinner to take home - there's nothing like leftovers from Thanksgiving. A turkey sandwich the next day - there's nothing better.

Yalla, Bye.

BLIND DATE

2009-11-19T09:14:00.010+02:00

There is no such thing anymore as a "Blind Date"!

Let me tell you about a modern blind date. A good friend called me and asked if I were willing to meet a new man. What a question. Of course I was. She told me his name - he is someone quite well known in Israel - although I couldn't remember what he looked like. And - he said himself that he wanted to meet someone. (That's a good sign already, no?)

Aha! - I said to myself. I'll Google him - see what he looks like - learn a bit about him - be a bit prepared. And so I did.

When I arrived at the restaurant I recognized him immediately - remember, I Googled him - and walked over to greet him. "Hello", I said. "I recognized you because I Googled you". ( I thought that was a good beginning. Let him know that I was clever and computer literate.)

"Hello", he replied. "I didn't know what you looked like because you have no picture on Google - but I Googled you, too, and already know a lot about you".

Was that a good thing or a bad thing? He had read some of my blogs - about 15 or 20 of them - so he had a fair idea of where I stand politically, what I do in my spare time, what I read, my opinions on a lot of issues - you get the idea....you read my blogs.

And - he had already made up his mind that we weren't going to "work" together. How do I know? He told me so! The first thing he said to me was that we weren't on the same page politically - so we wouldn't discuss politics. Ooookaaay. Mind you, I didn't mind that we have opposing political views. (I already knew that - I read it on Google.) It makes life more interesting - I know what I think - I'd like to know what someone else thinks.

Then he told me that he noticed that I was a foodie and he was, too, and that I shouldn't think for a minute that he doesn't know how to cook. That was great with me. I love having company when I cook.

He continued by saying that he read that I have a lot of friends with whom I spend a great deal of time. He does not particularly like to be with people and I should understand that if we were to be together I would have to live a "split" life. My life with him and just with him - and my outgoing social life with my friends, without him. I should understand that if I invited him for dinner he would probably refuse the invitation. (I don't think so.)

I have a great life. The only reason I would consider adding someone to my life is to enhance it.

The truth is we ate and drank and talked for three hours. And we got on well together. Maybe if we'd had a chance to meet without Google getting in the way we might have decided we liked each other "in spite of.....".

As it was, Google had made up his mind for him. So - I'm not sure whether to say "Thank you Google for saving me a lot of time in a relationship that was not going to go anywhere." - or - "Damn you Google for putting the kibosh on a relationship before it ever had a chance to begin".

Was the old kind of blind date better? Her friend said she was gorgeous and funny and his friend said he was gorgeous and rich - now go knock yourselves out.

OK friends - keep looking - I'm still available.

Yalla, Bye.

GIMMEE A BREAK

2009-11-08T18:50:00.003+02:00

The other day I got up early - as is my wont - pulled in my newspapers - sat down with my cigarettes (yeah, yeah I know) and cup of morning chai masala - and on the front page of the International Herald Tribune - below the fold but on the front page nevertheless - read the headline "Love and politics in the White House".

And what did the article have to say - a long article continuing onto page -2- and taking up most of the page at that? Michelle and Barack Hussein Obama are bemoaning the fact that their "date nights" are very difficult to organize and are no longer private. Puleeeze.

Michelle pointed out that until last November they had not lived together full-time under one roof since 1996 due to the exigencies of business and politics. Today they spend more time together than ever before - they have time to send their kids off to school - together, exercise together - and "do not begin their public schedules until 9 or even 10 AM". Really? How many working couples can claim that they have time to do just that? Gimmee a break!

What the hell did he expect when he ran for President of the United States? Life to go on just as before? He is not a private citizen any more. He can't simply nip into his favorite bistro when he feels the need for an order of moules frites (mussels and french fries) or pick up two tickets at the TKTS booth in Times Square when he wants to see a Broadway show.

He's supposed to be the leader of the free world - or is that too much to ask? But perhaps it's better for us that he's busy fighting with FOXNews and bemoaning his loss of privacy to the New York Times (that's the parent company of the International Herald Tribune). Perhaps it's better for the world that he has time to run to Copenhagen to plead for the Olympics to come to Chicago. Perhaps it's better for the world that he spends so much time playing golf. That way he has less time to cause more serious damage.

Certainly a lot better than that terrible health care bill he wants to foist on the American public. Well - the truth is that I don't know exactly how terrible the health care bill really is - but neither does anyone else since no one has seen it - let alone read it.

Nevermind - I'm sick and tired of Obama and Obamacare. I shudder to think that I could still be living in New York and having to deal with the health care in the States. It's enough that I have to worry about what he's going "to do" about Israel & Iran & Guantanamo & Iraq & Afghanistan and and and and.......

So now I'll begin to get ready for Thanksgiving - it's in 2 1/2 weeks - much to do. Follow this space.

Yalla, Bye.

PUZZLE ME THIS

2009-10-30T17:24:00.003+02:00

It really takes so little to make me happy. Delicious food - great friends - a beautiful home - a trip abroad every so often - nice clothes - something always available to read - my car - well, not so little, actually, now that I think of it.

One of the things that really makes me happy is doing crossword puzzles. Not just any puzzle, mind you - the New York Times puzzle, the puzzle in New York Magazine when I can get it, the puzzles constructed by my cousin Steven which occasionally appear in USA Today - and, because I live in Jerusalem, the weekend puzzle in the Jerusalem Post.

Have you any idea how frustrating it is to settle down to do a puzzle - cigarettes (yeah yeah I know - I really should stop smoking) and coffee at the ready - pencil sharpened - and no puzzle.

The Jerusalem Post seems to have a gremlin living in their offices. More often than not there is something not quite right with the puzzle - but usually something quite small that one can work around. Last week and this week, however, the gremlin seems to have been working overtime.

Last week's puzzle was missing almost half if its DOWN clues. So this week there was a "corrected" version along with the new puzzle for this week. What happened? The "corrected" version was, once again, missing half of its DOWN clues - and the new puzzle was also missing half of its DOWN clues.

What gives Jerusalem Post???

I know, I know - in the whole scheme of things this seems quite trivial. After all, I have to worry about Afghanistan - will he or won't he send more troops? The medical coverage brouhaha in the States - will he or won't he get the bill pushed through somehow? Who will come out better in the U.S. elections - Republicans or Democrats?

Will Iran or won't Iran.........? Will Hezbollah or won't Hezbollah........? Will the Light Rail Line in Jerusalem ever be finished?

But dear gremlins - I can do the puzzle and worry at the same time - please go home and let the three puzzles appear correctly in the paper next weekend.

Yalla, Bye

YET MORE THIS 'N' THAT

2009-10-19T18:46:00.003+02:00

Just a lot of little things I've been meaning to tell you......

- Have you seen the film "Julie and Julia"? See it! An absolutely adorable film - Meryl Streep has Julia Child down pat. I laughed and I cried - and I thoroughly enjoyed myself.

I always looked forward to watching Julia on the television. I've never forgotten her "disasters" in the kitchen - food falling on the floor - her potato cake breaking apart as she tried to flip it. I follow her philosophy to this day - what happens in your kitchen stays there. If you don't tell - no one will ever know. For instance - my flourless chocolate cake fell on the counter - NOT THE FLOOR - as I was transferring it to the serving plate - and broke apart. What did I do? I rolled the cake into little balls and served it as chocolate truffles!

- I will read the back of cereal boxes if there is nothing else around - and for a while I seem to have been reading a lot of cereal boxes - so to speak. But -- I just recently read three books that I have to tell you about - really good and enjoyable -- I think you might like them.

"The Little Book" by Selden Edwards. I'm not crazy about "time travel" books - but on the recommendation - nay, nay, the insistence - of my friend, Marallyn, I read this. It is beautifully written - Mr. Edwards took about 25 years or so to write it - and each word he uses is the absolutely perfect word for what he wants to say. I loved the book - both the style and the story.

"Cathedral of the Sea" by Idelfonso Falcones. Much in the style of "Sarum" or Pillars of the Earth" - a sweeping historical saga taking place in Barcelona. A bit draggy in spots - just skip those bits - but fascinating - much that I didn't know.

"Six Suspects" by Vikas Swarup. Did you see "Slumdog Millionaire" or read the book from which it was adapted - "Q & A"? I did both - and enjoyed both equally. This book proves that Mr. Swarup is not just a one-book phenomenon - this book is excellent. I was so sorry when I came to the end - it was just that good and I wanted to go on reading.

- What do you think of the "Goldstone Report" damning us for our actions in Gaza during "Cast Lead"? We killed Palestinians? Sure - that's one of the prices of war. Nevermind that we warned the Gazans that were were going to bomb and to get the women and children out of the way. Nevermind that during the "war" we sent in humanitarian supplies to Gaza. But why should I be surprised? Israel is blamed for everything - whether it's our fault or not. So why should Mr. Goldstone be any different - or any fairer than anyone else? Between him and Barack Hussein Obama the Arab world believes it has a free pass - blame the Jews - blame Israel. Am I paranoid? Probably.

- The restaurant scene in Jerusalem is getting better and better. A new place opened in the shuk (our outdoor market called Machane Yehuda). The restaurant is called "Machneyuda" - written as one word - but as I've never seen the name written in English I'm sort of guessing at the spelling from the Hebrew.

The place is non-kosher - the food is delicious - the service is lovely and caring and friendly - and they have some of my favorite things on the menu. Moach (brains) - shkeday egel (sweetbreads) - slavim (quails) and netzach ketzavim (butcher's cut). Very hard to get a reservation - just keep trying.

- And now off to do some cooking of my own. Some friends are showing up on Wednesday from the States - actually they're already in Israel and are doing a bit of touring and visiting up north. I'm doing a Shabbat dinner in their honor - I'll let you know how it went.

Yalla, Bye.

NOBEL PEACE PRIZE - Feh Feh Feh

2009-10-10T08:02:00.004+02:00

What was the Nobel Committee thinking? They have just cheapened the prize for every deserving person who has ever won it or will ever win it.

'Splain me Lucy - just exactly what has Barack Obama accomplished? ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.

He is waffling about what to do in Afghanistan - why should we be surprised? He took four months to choose a dog.

He has put the United Stated trillions of dollars in debt. I guess that was an "accomplishment".

As a senator he voted "present" more than 130 times. What does "present" mean? It means he had his tushie on a chair at the time the vote was taken - he didn't vote "yes" - he didn't vote "no". I suppose that was a good idea. That way he couldn't be accused of having an opinion.

When he made his little speech on the White House lawn he said he was "humbled" - as well he should have been - he has much to be humble about.

He said he "doesn't believe he deserves the prize". Right on - he doesn't.

When Yassir Arafat won the PEACE Prize I thought the world was in trouble. Now that Obama has been awarded the prize - I know we are in trouble.

If Barack Hussein Obama was really humble he should have thanked the Nobel Committee for the honor - but refused to accept the prize until he has done something tangible to deserve it.

Alfred Nobel must be flipping around in his grave.

Yalla, Bye.

DANCE ME TO THE END OF LOVE

2009-10-04T14:15:00.005+02:00

"Dance Me To The End Of Love" - that's my favorite Leonard Cohen song and the one with which he opened his concert at the Ramat Gan Stadium last Thursday evening - and Marallyn and I were actually there!

Don't ask about the excitement - of getting there - of being there - of being a part of that magical, electric, exciting, smashing evening.

The short version is that Marallyn has a friend - whom she hasn't seen in about fifty years - who remembered that she lives in Israel - who has a son who was coming to do the sound for the Leonard Cohen concert - who offered to get her two complimentary VIP tickets - who got the tickets - and there we were.

Can you imagine - she didn't even consider asking her kids to go with her - I was the lucky invitee. Another "don't even ask" - you all know that I have the chush kivoon (sense of direction) of a toaster oven - with my apologies to toaster ovens - they probably have a better sense of direction than I have. (That we arrived there and back home in the same century was a miracle.)

Anyway - off we went. The concert was due to begin at 7:45 PM - and L.C. always begins his concerts on time. So we left Jerusalem at 3:00 PM - and none too soon, I might add. Marallyn called people for directions. I called people for directions. We looked on the internet. And had it not been for a very nice lady who took pity on us when we didn't know where we were and led us directly to the street we needed - I'd still be driving around. It only took us two hours to get to the stadium - mind you, the immediate world was going there - or at least 49,998 other people. Yes - 50,000 people were there.

And there was not nearly enough parking space. The spaces we did see were being "guarded" by people with cell phones who were directing their husbands / wives / friends to the spaces they were holding. So we drove up one aisle, down another aisle, up another aisle etc etc etc. Until suddenly - well, those of you who know Marallyn know she doesn't move too quickly - she doesn't run, doesn't sprint, doesn't hurry - Marallyn was no longer sitting beside me. She had seen someone going towards a car - she jumped out of my car - ran to the soon-to-be-available-spot - and stood there guarding it until I was able to get in. OK - so the space wasn't exactly legal - a bit on the grass - a bit on the sidewalk - who cared - it was a place to leave the car.

Forget all the rest of it - going to kupa 1 (box office 1), going to the trailer, going back to kupa 1, going back to the trailer, finally getting our tickets, walking halfway around the stadium to our entrance gate, walking up a million stairs, walking down a million stairs, finding ourselves in the wrong section and walking back up and down the other million stairs - we were there.

And then the magic began. No half naked dancers, no pyrotechnics, no dry-ice smoke - just Leonard Cohen - a 75 year old man wearing an Armani suit and a black hat - and singing his heart out for us. We all loved him. He loved us back. After all - we belonged to him and he belonged to us. He was a Jew coming home. He spoke to us a bit in Hebrew - he introduced his enormously talented back-up singers and musicians - and at the end he gave the priestly blessing (Birkat Cohanim) that only a Cohen (priest) can give - and he is Leonard Cohen after all.

Israeli audiences are the best - we appreciate the hell out of everything - we react - we show love - we are there with the performer. There were moments you could hear that proverbial pin drop - there were moments when we all sang along with him - you could feel our love for him and his love for us. He sang for 3 1/4 hours - all my favorite songs - and at the end he even had the energy to skip off the stage.

Bank Discount sponsored the concert and on each one of the 50,000 seats was a green and black canvas bag in which was a pillow (to make it a bit easier on our tushies), and a "thingie" - I don't know what it's called but when you bend it the liquid inside lights up and stays lit for several hours. Just imagine the sight of this large stadium - the largest in Israel - with 50,000 people waving these green lights in time to the music - slowly, quickly - but in time - in tune - with Leonard Cohen.

It was magic - it was electric - it was not-to-be-missed - and to my dearest, dearest friend - Marallyn - I can only say simply - Thank You.

Yalla, Bye.

MAZAL TOV, C.M.

2009-09-18T10:02:00.004+03:00

My C.M. (Computer Mumche) got married the other day. Yes - hard as it is to believe - he has another life aside from baby-sitting my computer. And so it was that my friend, Evelyn - who sent him to me - blessings and more blessings on her head - and I were invited to the wedding.

This is Israel, don't forget. Everyone is family. You belong to everyone and they belong to you. And so when there is a simcha (a happy event) - you are included in the celebrations. I ask you - would I be invited to my C.M.'s wedding in New York? (No, I wasn't, as long as you're asking.)

There seems to be a competition in Israel to find a venue that is the most difficult place in the land to get to. Whoever finds the place that is the furthest away from your home or the most impossible to reach - or, better yet - someplace that neither you nor anybody else have never heard of - wins!! I thought I had been to every almost-inaccessible wedding spot in Israel - not at all. This week Evelyn and I almost drove off the end of the world.

As you all know by now - I have the chush kivoon (sense of direction) of a toaster-oven - no offense meant to toaster-ovens. So Evelyn drove. Was I glad. I didn't have any idea of where I was for even one minute of the trip. Okay, I just lied a bit - we went down kvish mispar 1 (road number 1) - I actually knew where I was for a very short time. Then we turned left somewhere, then we drove straight ahead for a while, then we made a hairpin U-turn onto a parallel road, then we made a right turn - and then we drove - and we drove - and we drove - and the road turned to gravel and then the road turned to dirt - and there were no lights - and when we couldn't drive any more - there we were.

It was a lovely wedding. Very modern. The groom was walked down the aisle by his Mom, his Dad, and his Mom's partner - whose name also appeared on the invitation. So different to the divorces I know - including mine from my practice husband - where everyone hates everyone else. Nice people at our table - including a journalist from Montreal who shares the same taste in jazz and blues as mine. We both gave our ages away by reminiscing about Art Tatum, Teddy Wilson and the MJQ - not to mention Chuck and Gap Mangione. But, interestingly, he had never heard of Nelly Lutcher, Rosemary (ChiChi) Murphy or Alberta Hunter.

Also at the table were three people from Ra'anana or Kfar Saba - or someplace like that along the coast - who drove around for one-and-a half-hours after they reached the vicinity of the wedding before they actually found the place!!! Evelyn didn't make one wrong tune, may I tell you. She even led those same people back to the highway after the wedding in the dark - pitch black darkness - without a misstep.

So - my C.M. is now married - for the second time. His wife is absolutely lovely.(But what do I know - I liked his first wife, too.) I wish them all the happiness there is to be had in the world - what a wonderful start to a New Year.

Of course you understand that I need him here - now. I need to scan something and the little message on my printer is telling me that I can't - and I don't know why. Do you think he'd interrupt his honeymoon for me?

And to all of you a Shana Tova Umetuka. G'mar Hatima Tova.

Yalla, Bye.

REQUIEM FOR A SPARE RIB

2009-08-30T19:08:00.004+03:00

About a year ago or so I wrote a REQUIEM FOR A CHICKEN WING when our favorite restaurant for grilled chicken wings (nu - what else?) closed.

Today it's a REQUIEM FOR A SPARE RIB. You can tell I've been here for a long time because I judge everything by what "used to be there". For instance - there used to be a restaurant just off the Jerusalem - Tel Aviv highway called PUNDAK MOTZA (Motza Inn). It was there for what seemed forever - had great stuffed chicken by the way - and then closed.

Then there opened the BLACK STEER - a restaurant which served (notice the past tense?) steaks, burgers, chicken and fabulous spare ribs. Not lamb spare ribs, not veal spare ribs - but real pork spare ribs. Juicy, succulent, tasty pork spare ribs. The portions were so large that Marallyn (my partner in crime) and I used to share a one-half portion - and walk away stuffed. We always started with a roquefort salad, then the ribs which came with either chips (french fries) or baked potatoes (with sour cream!) and the most gorgeous onion rings you can imagine.

I know, I know - meat and dairy at the same meal. Not kosher at all. But if you think about it this way - two negatives make a positive. Pork is forbidden - meat and dairy together are forbidden - both negatives. Ergo - two negatives make a positive. Logical no?

We've been there for lunch, for dinner - have tried almost everything on the menu at one time or another - and now it's gone. We went there to celebrate, to commiserate - or just because.

Would you believe that there isn't another restaurant in Jerusalem serving such fabulous spare ribs on the bone? ( Well - there is another one but the ribs are a different cut and much too fatty.) So now the BLACK STEER is only a memory. Does this mean we have to eat kosher from now on?

Yalla, Bye.

VA'AD BAYIT - the end

2009-08-11T07:46:00.004+03:00

Last night was the end of an era - I am no longer Rosh Va'ad (head of the Building Committee)!

Actually - that's not strictly accurate. Darla and I resigned about three weeks ago and last night was just the icing on the cake.

We had an assifa clali (a general meeting) to decide on a Management Company to run the building. Can you imagine - a whole Management Company to take the place of the two of us. Dun't esk!!

The Company which was chosen wrote a contract - a fabulous contract - all on their behalf. We had almost no rights at all. We had to hire them for a whole year - with no exit clause. They would decide what had to be done for the building - which we would have to pay for in addition to our monthly payments to them. It was as if someone came to me and said: "Rena, I want to manage your money. Turn over all your assets to me - I'll do as I wish - you won't know how much your management fees will be until the end of the year - you have no right to look at the books during the year - you can't leave me until the year is over - and that's it".

Not to mention that "we" did due diligence and came up with several black marks against the Company - and "they" still wanted to go ahead and sign the contract! Hellloo!

What - you didn't hear the screaming? The yelling? The accusations? The vicious personal remarks? All this directed randomly at everyone and anyone who was there. I'm surprised they didn't hear the yelling in Tel Aviv. Someone called someone else a liar. Someone - a lawyer, an immigrant from England - who should know better - called an Israeli "such an Israeli" in the most derogatory tone imaginable. And this lawyer negotiates contracts for big businesses, yet. (I wonder if her boss knows how she operates?)

By the way - this same Israeli told me - in very admiring tones - that I have become "very Israeli" - and I was very complimented.

Listen my friends - I'm here to tell you that right will prevail. Fight for what you believe in. The proposal to hire the Company failed - we still don't have a Management Company - Darla and I have left for good - that's famous last words as I resigned two previous times "for good". I'll keep you posted.

Yalla, Bye.

NOW ---WHERE WAS I?????

2009-08-01T18:16:00.003+03:00

Oh yes - the last time I wrote was in December 2008 - a very long time ago in blogger years.

This has been a terrible year - Queen Elizabeth call it an annus horribilus - a year I don't care to repeat.

First - I developed shingles. If you don't know what that is - Google it. If you know what it is you'll know just how enervating and debilitating it is to have it. Got over that - took weeks - nay, months - with no lasting ill effects. Then - Marallyn's Mom - Bubbie Chana - was ill for a long time - and she passed away - and we had to deal with that. I really miss her - she was a grand old gal.

Then - I slipped during a rare - very rare - sleet storm in Jerusalem - and got all banged up - nothing broken - no permanent damage - but in absolute agony for weeks with bruised ribs.

And a first for me - I haven't had a dinner party in ages - no energy - no appetite - no strength to do much of anything. Not to think that I haven't been in my kitchen at all - have been doing some cooking and baking for friends - but that's about it.

Through all that I was still Rosh Va'ad (head of the Building Committee). Lots of work - lots of nudgy neighbors to deal with - lots of building problems - but - FINALLY - a light bulb went on. I don't have to be Rosh Va'ad if I don't want to. And so I resigned a few weeks ago. After years and years of running the building - ees no' my yob any more. I'm finally a private citizen. They are now looking for a management company to replace me - can you imagine that?

Anyway - there is much more to write about than the past year. It's gone - and all the attendant troubles that were so tiresome to deal with. I had a "pity party" for a while - well, who wouldn't. But with the help of my fabulous friends - I've always said I was so lucky to have my friends - who fed me and cooked for me and shlepped me to the doctor and commiserated with me - all is well now and we can go on to bigger and better things.

So much to write about - politics - Obama - the state (and State) of Israel - Obama - my life - recipes - Obama ------you get the message.

Watch this space. I promise - I'll write again soon. Glad to be back.

Yalla, Bye.

MY BEAUTIFUL MUMBAI

2008-12-01T16:07:00.003+02:00

For those of you who read this blog regularly - you'll remember just how much I love India - and especially Mumbai. I think I've spent more time there than any other place in India.

I've been to India four times in the past five years - and just last week I said to Myra (my trusty India traveling companion) that I was ready to go again - I haven't been there in a while and am beginning to need my Indian "fix".

There has been much said and written about the horror that took place in Mumbai last week. All those unnecessary deaths - innocent bystanders - the young couple who were running the Chabad House - police - the head of the anti-terror unit.

For me - as for everyone else I am sure - it was an experience happily to have been missed. But for me - and I'm sure for everyone who has ever been to India - it took on a personal dimension. There was hardly a place that was attacked that I didn't relate to.

We stayed at a lovely little boutique hotel just behind the Taj Mahal - although I'd been to the hotel several times. It was a magical, beautiful, elegant hotel. And the Oberoi was just across the street from my travel agent's (later to become our friend) - Mumbai office. The Oberoi was also lovely and elegant - although much newer and more modern looking - and when Myra and I were staying with her cousin Guy we used to go to the little deli there to shop - and eat of course...as we did in several other of their restaurants.

Leopold's Bar and Cafe? It was a hangout for foreigners, tourists and Indians right on the Colaba - and as far as Myra and I were concerned a place that served the absolutely best tandoori chicken we had ever eaten. And for me - a big bowl of incredible egg-rolls. Yes, a bowl - of I don't know how many egg rolls to an order - cut into pieces and served with delicious sauce. And where I always drank lemon juice and soda - with the "sweet" on the side.

The train station - a horror to see with the bodies lying all around. A station once so beautiful - so bustling - so full of life.

I saw images on the television of the Colaba with all the shops closed down - a street that was always busy and teeming with people - a street where there was hardly place to move - a street where we went often....to shop or just to browse.

Of course we were at the Gateway to India opposite the Taj Mahal Hotel - and we went on a boat to Elephantina Island from that area - from probably right where the terrorists landed.

I've been in toch with my Indian friends who are now living in Delhi - although they have friends and family in Mumbai who - miracle of miracles - are all fine.

I am so sad...for my beautiful city - for all those who lost their lives - for all those who are injured - for my wake-up call to reality when it finally hit home that India - and the West - and Jews - and everyone, actually, who doesn't agree with Muslim ideology - are all expendable when terror abounds.

A BLACK DAY IN HISTORY

2008-11-05T17:07:00.004+02:00

I awoke this morning to find that Obama has been elected President of the United States. As far as I'm concerned - this is a black day in history - absolutely no pun intended.

As long as I live I will never understand the great American public. I voted for McCain - or rather - I voted against Obama. Truth to tell - I wasn't happy with either candidate. I don't believe that either one of them is strong enough to lead America - certainly not strong enough to deal with world problems and world leaders.

And nevermind that I was terrified that Sarah Palin could possibly have become President at some point - she's another one who scares me because she's untried and untested. But then again - Joe Biden as President?

And who is Obama anyway? Does anyone know the first thing about him except for the fact that he surrounds himself with undesirables? Reverend Jeremiah Wright? Louis Farrakhan? The Reverend Pflager? Bill Ayers? Rezko? These are the people Obama counts as friends and mentors? Who is Obama - a Senator who voted "present" more than one hundred times during Senate votes instead of standing up for his principles? What principles? What do we know about him?

I will never believe that he sat in Reverend Wright's church for twenty years - twenty years - and was not aware of what the man was preaching. Did Wright refrain from his diatribes when Obama was in attendance because he knew that somewhere - twenty years down the road - Obama would run for the presidency and could "honestly" say that he didn't know what Reverend Wright stood for? Hogwash!

This is the man who will be the President of the United States - and the leader of the free world. A man who is a follower of Jeremiah Wright - anti-white, anti-Jewish, anti--- everything that is good and decent.

A man whose wife is "proud to be an American for the first time in her adult life"? Why - because her husband was running for President? There is nothing else to be proud about?

Americans want change. Fine. Good. But a change to what? What is he offering us? What is he offering the world? What experience does he have? What is his world view? What is his view on anything? Has anyone noticed that for the past 21 months of his campaign he has said - absolutely nothing?

At this point I see him as only an empty suit with nothing to offer - nothing for me to build any hope on. He has charisma? I don't see it.

For some strange reason he became the media darling....why? What do other people see that I don't? Do you really believe for even one minute that he will deliver - or be able to deliver - on any of his campaign promises? Raise taxes? Now? Get out of Iraq? Now? Speak with Teheran with no pre-conditions? Bring peace to the Middle East? Get a grip.

He frightens me more than I can tell you. My only real hope is that he proves me wrong. We'll have to wait and see.

SHIPUTZIM - part 6

2008-10-02T12:59:00.004+03:00

Moving right along......the shiputzim saga continues. Some of my cast of characters have changed. Jemal - who began painting - is gone. He was terrible. He was what my Mother called a schmearer. A schmearer was a painter who was a slob - he schmeared the paint all over the walls - and everything else in sight. For those of you from New York - a schmear is what you order on a bagel. Schmear - as opposed to a bagel and a lot of cream cheese. You know - "Give me a bagel with a schmear" - that's a bit of cream cheese spread on the bagel any-which-way - that's the way a schmearer paints. Got it?

So - Jemal is gone. Then we had Ayesh - he was really a good painter - but he only had one day to give us - so he's gone, too. Today we have Munir - also a very good painter - so he's busy painting his way through the rest of the flat. Avi and Yaniv (new to me - one of Avi's workers) have gone out to buy "stuff" - more paint, ruba (grout) for the new bathroom - which is almost - almost - finished - and whatever other "stuff" they need. They've been gone for hours now - I can't imagine what they're buying but it must be important - unless they're just out having a good time.

Now Munir is beginning to paint my hall bathroom and my laundry room - that should be fun as, at the moment, that is the only useable bathroom. Will this never end?

And for the past three days all work came to a standstill. Rosh Hashana. No working on Monday - after all, it was a short day as everyone had to get ready for hag (holiday). Then Tuesday and Wednesday - the hag itself. Today is Thursday - work. Friday - usually a day off. Saturday - shabbat (the sabbath) - no work. If my new bathroom gets done any time in this century I'll be very happy.

And Rosh Hashana itself? I had a wonderful time. Dinner the first night at Marallyn's son and daughter-in-law's house with the family. Her daughter-in-law really knocked herself out - much too much food - as always - some Ashkenazi some Kurdi - and Marallyn made the absolutely best Oriental (oriental - as in Mizrachi - middle-Eastern - not Chinese) fish ever. And I got to eat the head of the fish - eyes and all. (Okay everybody - all together now - uggghh!) Oriental Jews always have a fish head on the table for Rosh Hashana - a custom the Ashkenazim don't follow.

Tuesday I went to beit knesset (shul, synagogue) then to Riva and David's for dinner. Another great dinner - again lots of food - lots of laughter - great conversation - and home to bed. Wednesday beit knesset again and then on to the annual pot-luck lunch at Sally and Michael's. And again - much much too much food. We always prepare too much food for the holidays - I think it comes with the territory - Jews EAT. Except when we fast - but then we eat a lot before and a lot after to make up for the twenty-five or twenty six hours when we had no nourishment. Poor us.

I'm sure you've all heard the short history of the Jews - "They came to kill us - we won - let's eat". And we've been eating ever since.

So we'll have a few more days of "work" - "no work" and then comes Yom Kippur - the Day of Atonement - the holiest day of the Jewish year. When I will fast and try to atone for all my sins.

And if I've offended any of you during this past year - please forgive me.

Yalla, Bye.

SHIPUTZIM - and other traumas - part 5

2008-09-21T11:19:00.005+03:00

It's not enough that my whole life has been turned upside down with my shiputzim (renovations) - my computer also chose this time to gepayger (kill, die - Yiddish) itself. I called my trusty CM (computer mumche [expert]) who diagnosed its illness - terminal hard-drive failure. But - it was still under warranty - so my CM took it to the maabada (laboratory) and now all is well. Well - sort of.

Why "sort of"? When it was repaired some of the" thingies" got reconfigured (whatever that means) and everything doesn't look exactly as it did before - which for me is tantamount to disaster. As I don't understand computer theory I don't know how to fix things up. And my CM is in Paris visiting his father - so he is advising me long-distance by email. Somethings I can do - some things I can't. I'll have to live with it until he gets back. He has spent so much time here recently that I'll have to start charging him rent. But he's a good kid and as long as I have homemade cookies for him he's happy....a small price to pay.

As for the shiputzim itself - we're moving right along. The floors are almost all laid down - except for the panelim (baseboards) and some of the ruba (grout). Right now Khaled and Suher are breaking apart my old bathroom so we can put in a new one - you would not believe the dust here - everything is covered in dust. Kahled and Suher you might ask? Two new names to add to my cast of characters - they are the floor and tile men.

As you can tell from their names they are Arabs. And as this is the month of Ramadan (which comes out at a different time each year), and as they are Muslims - several times a day they are on their knees facing Mecca and praying. So - every so often all work stops and they pray to Allah. I'll bet you don't see that too often when you renovate! During Ramadan Muslims fast from sun-up to sun-down - so they don't waste any time drinking coffee or eating - they don't even drink water. It's like Yom Kippur for a whole month.

I just got a phone call from Rachel - the woman who supplied all my flooring and bathroom fittings. She's going off on holiday next week so she wants to bring all the fittings here now - two toilets, faucets, the interputzim (see earlier blog), the shower-head - all are arriving within the hour. And where will we put them? My machsan (storeroom) is filled with all my of own things, all the tiles and flooring for my new bathroom, a bathtub - and, I guess, all the new stuff will have to fit in - somehow.

So now - I have to leave you. Menash (the architect) just arrived. Mousa (the gardner) is coming shortly to advise on where he wants the front watering system replaced on the front mirpesset (blacony) and Rachel is due to show up any minute.

And so it continues.

Yalla, Bye.

SHORT AND SWEET IN BUDAPEST

2008-09-07T17:59:00.003+03:00

Last week was my birthday. And last week my brother, David, was lecturing in Budapest at a conference. And as we don't get to see each other more than once or twice a year as he lives in Canada and I live in Israel - and as Budapest is not really so far from Israel - he invited me to spend a few days with him in Hungary after he finished lecturing. And so off I went to Budapest.

Four days - crammed full of sightseeing, eating, going out with his colleagues, eating, celebrating my birthday, eating, lots of catching up - and more eating. We had some of the best meals in Budapest and some of the best pastries - and I don't don't even like pastry as a rule. And what was my first dinner in Hungary? Cliche but true - Chicken Paprikas with little dumplings - and palacsinta for dessert. In fact - we had variations of palacsinta every single day - as both starters and dessert - including my birthday when the restaurant sent us another fancier dessert as a gift. So we ate two desserts. There went the diet - but who cares - back on the diet today.

And if you go nowhere else for dessert - you must go to "Gerbeaud" for coffee and cake - any kind of cake! We had Schwartzwalder Kuchen - cream and chocolate and cherries - divine.

To begin with, David chose a fabulous hotel - and I don't use the word fabulous lightly. We stayed at the "MaMaison Andrassy Hotel" on Andrassy ut 111. (Imagine some signs over the vowels in every word I write in Hungarian and you'll get the picture.) They didn't put one foot wrong. The staff got to know you and your likes immediately, our rooms were gorgeous, the food in their fancy "destination" restaurant, "Baraka" was to die for - and they sent up a bottle of champagne to my room in celebration of my birthday. And when we left to go to the airport at 5:30 in the morning - at which time the restaurant was still closed - we found cups of hot expresso waiting for us when we checked out. Who could ask for more than that?

I won't give you a blow-by-blow of what we did and saw in Budapest - you can read a guide-book for that. But I will tell you my impressions. First of all - it's not hard to remember people's names - all men are called either Istvan, Janos or Laszlo - with a couple of Peters thrown in. The women are called Marta. Yes - I am exaggerating - but just a bit. And the language - completely and utterly incomprehensible. Hungarian is related to Finnish and Mongol - how helpful is that? There was not one word I read that I could relate to any other word in any other language. Oh yes - Opera is Opera and Oktagon is Octagon. And nothing is pronounced as it is written.

We took public transportation - a wonderful, logical and on-time system - and passed some of the same stations each day. For instance - "Vorosmarty ter" is pronounced "Forushmattytare" and "Deak Ference ter" is pronounced "Dayakferentschtare" - although to make matters more interesting Mr.Deak Ference is really Mr. Ference Deak - in Hungarian you write the last name first. Are you still with me?

And the city is clean clean clean - what a joy. And lots of open spaces and green parks and gardens. However - I think that all the extra steps and stairs that were left over from every other country in the world were sent to Budapest. I have never climbed so many stairs in my life and when, on Thursday we spent the afternoon and evening with David's colleagues - Istvan and Marta (see above for names!) - and were visiting a lovely town outside of Budapest and came to a steep flight of stairs my brother said plaintively - "No more stairs, please!" - and we walked up the hill instead.

Of course, any city is more interesting when you are lucky enough to know people who actually live there. Istvan and Marta are not only great guides but fun and funny people. They are Hungarian and live both in Budapest and Canada so their English is quite perfect - a real plus when you don't understand one word in the local language. And we got to go to a little, funky restaurant in a little town we would never have gotten to - and could feel like the locals if even for one evening.

And now - back to real life. My kablanim (contractors) began work again today - my floors - which should have been delivered tomorrow - are still on the ship - which has still not reached port here - and so it goes.

Yalla, Bye.

SHIPUTZIM - part 4

2008-08-28T10:14:00.003+03:00

We're now into the millionth week (what - it's not been that long? It certainly feels like it.) of my shiputzim (renovations). I am living in an absolute disaster area, and for someone like me - Marallyn calls me anal retentive - it's getting on to serious nervous breakdown time. I like everything neat and clean and orderly and in place - not even close to that now.

Our cast of characters has changed a bit. Avi and Shmuel and Liran are still with me. Max has finished his work on the soregim ( window bars), Uzi is still manufacturing my windows and doors, and Ahmad has left. Achmad is a plumber - an Arab from Abu Gosh - and quite a good plumber according to Avi, who has employed him for fifteen years. But - he and Avi had a rip-roaring fight last week and Avi fired him. Ahmad is about six-and-a-half feet tall - Avi is about my height - five-foot-two - so if they had come to blows guess who the winner would have been. No blows - just a lot of screaming in Arabic (Avi speaks fluent Arabic) - and Hebrew - that was I speaking in Hebrew trying to calm them down. No go - Ahmad is toast.

Now we have Jabal - or Jamal - I'm not sure as there are two of them with that (those) name(s) - who will lay the new floors and re-tile my new bathroom.

There is also Rahel - an Israeli who lived in New York for years - and who has a wonderful business supplying tiles and flooring and kitchen and bathroom fixtures for almost-wholesale prices. Wholesale has come to Israel and I'm taking advantage of it. Yesterday Rahel and I went out looking for toilets and brazim (faucets) for my bathrooms. We had already decided on the flooring, tiles for the new bathroom and the bathtub - so yesterday was the next-to-last shopping expedition - the last one will be for towel bars and accessories. And I managed to save lots of money. Who needs to buy retail?

Am also adding to my Hebrew vocabulary - we bought two interputzim (a fitting which allows water to come into the bathtub or toilet or sink). It's actually a German word - adapted to Hebrew with the "im" ending - and a word which I will probably never use again!

My bathroom is not exactly the biggest room in the flat - not teensy-weensy, mind you - just not palatial like those in Architectural Digest. For one solid hour Avi and Rahel and I were in my bathroom - yes the three of us - trying to finalize the exact placement of my bathub and toilet - and also the placement of all the various faucets and interputzim - who knew there were such cholices? Why wasn't Menash (my architect) there? He's off in Europe someplace - but he'll be back in time to supervise the way he wants the tiles to be laid - b'lachson (on an angle) - so that the tiles look like a carpet going up the side of the bathtub. Don't even ask.

And why am I not annoyed that Menash is away and that Avi went off to Italy for two weeks in the middle of the job? Because - I'm off on Sunday night to Budapest for a week. To tell you the truth - I think we Israelis are crazy - but a holiday is a holiday and as I don't get to see my brother more than once or twice a year at most, we will have a chance to be together next week. He's attending a kenes (conference) in Budapest over the weekend which will be over on Monday afternoon. So I'm arriving on Monday and we'll have a week together sightseeing and talking and eating and talking and just being together - and talking.

As I don't have room in my house for one more little "goody" - I actually have enough dishes and glassware and cutlery and serving pieces to feed the Israeli Army should they decide to come for dinner (just a bit of an exaggeration) I'll buy some of that famous Hungarian paprika.

Will write again when I get back.

Yalla, Bye.

SHIPUTZIM - part 3

2008-08-19T13:19:00.004+03:00

My kablan (contractor) is back from his holiday in Italy - he had a wonderful time, thank you very much. He returned Saturday night and began working again on Sunday - yes, for those of you who don't live here in Israel, Sunday is a "regular" day - just like Monday in the rest of the civilized world.

While he was gone I managed to do lots of things - mainly getting out of the house every day to do my errands - going out to lunch - going out to dinner - and spending money like a madwoman.

I bought a new dining table - one that opens - easily - to fit eight or ten or twelve - well, maybe thirteen in a pinch (I'm not superstitious). My old table sat up to six people -- or twelve. If I wanted to feed seven people we either had to sit very close together - or very far apart.

So - then I had to buy new table cloths - with napkins to match camoovan (of course). I actually found a lovely shop right around the corner from my flat which makes cloths to measure - and oval ones, no less if that's what you want. (Do you have any idea just how difficult it is to find an oval tablecloth - even in America?) Now I have cloths to fit every size of my table - what joy.

I ordered white ones - white is easy. Now they're getting in beige samples for me to choose from - after all, how can I use a white cloth with ivory-colored dishes?

In the meantime, my cast of characters is growing. We have Itzik - who is from OURAN - the company which makes the units which supply heat and hot water. I need to leshadreg (upgrade) mine as there are now more efficient units on the market. Then we have Uzi - who manufactures profil belgi (don't even go there - it's a special kind of window and door) - who will make my new windows and doors. He is one of eight brothers - some of whom are in the business - a very large business - and as some of them look alike I can hardly tell them apart. They are all lovely and say that their mother doesn't mind having eight sons - no daughters - because she has eight lovely daughters-in-law - all different kinds - all different colors - meaning Ashkenazi and Sephardic - from all over the world.

Then there is Max who works on soregim (security bars). But not just any old ugly bars - beautiful bars which look quite elegant. Sad as it is to admit - we do have burglaries and robberies - and the insurance companies insist on soregim. Max is Orthodox - black velvet kippa (yarmulka or skull-cap) - and only eats and drinks Kosher. Although my house is Kosher it's apparently not Kosher enough because he only drinks coffee and water here. He won't eat any of my home-made cookies - while I sift my flour (OK) I don't set aside a bit of the dough for - whatever (not OK).

And for the moment there is Liran - who works with his uncle Avi - who is my kablan.

And so it goes.

Yalla, Bye.

SHIPUTZIM - part 2

2008-08-04T19:03:00.002+03:00

Phase one of my shiputzim (renovations) is now finished. Why phase one? Because Avi - my kablan (contractor) is now on holiday in Italy with his family. To be fair, I knew he had this holiday booked before he began my job - but I also knew that if I put the job off any longer it would go on into the winter and, as I am changing my windows, I need to do that while there is no rain.

So - as the schedule stands now - we should be finished sometime in October. In the meantime, I am living in a mess. An organized mess to be sure - but a mess nevertheless. Remember that I said that they were yekkes (see the last blog for an explanation of the word)? They swept up after themselves - they washed the floors - they cleaned my whole kitchen - and I am now busy moving my "stuff" from one cabinet to another. It gives me a chance to get rid of other "stuff" that I haven't used for years - and will probably never use.

To tell you the truth - I think I come by this meshegas (craziness) honestly. My Mother was forever changing the house. She'd wake up on a given morning - say to herself "I think I'll move the furniture around" or "I think I'll wallpaper the kid's bedroom today" - and we'd come back from school to a different place completely. My Mom was into DIY before it became fashionable.

My brother and I spent our childhood with scraped knees and black-and-blue legs. That's because the furniture was never where it was supposed to be. My Mother moved everything - from the tables and chairs to the beds to our big baby grand piano - all by herself. We were always walking into something that wasn't there yesterday. And so I carry on the tradition today. Which is why I have no trouble falling asleep in strange hotel rooms - it 's just like home - unfamiliar.

This is the first time in weeks that my house is free of workmen. And to celebrate, my two darlings - Yoav and Ernesto - and I, went out for a long, boozy lunch. [No - I did not drive.] We began with a lovely bottle of Lebanese wine at their house and then went on to one of my favorite restaurants - "Colony". A terriffic "happening" place. Good atmosphere - good vibes (do they still say that?) - and wonderful food. And another bottle of wine - this time a "Cava" - a sparkling wine from Spain.

I know it must sound strange - but I love going out to eat with people who stick their forks into other people's plates and don't mind when you stick your fork into their plates. Which is just what we always do - so that we can get a taste of everything.

We all had hatzil baladi - roasted eggplant on a bed of tehina (sesame seed paste), liver pate with cherry-tomato jam, chicken livers with silan (date honey), a mix of sweetbreads and chicken livers on a laffa (a sort of large, thin pita) - yes - we're all big on chicken livers - and musar (drum fish) with herbed potato puree on a bed of sliced roasted beets.

I'm not a big dessert eater - but I stuck my spoon into their desserts - sorbet with fresh fruit and some sort of halva (a confection made from sesame seeds) concoction with halva ice cream and shredded halva - to die for. And then we all went home to sleep the lunch off.

What a way to spend an afternoon. Heaven.

Yalla, Bye.

SHIPTUZIM

2008-07-23T14:21:00.002+03:00

And so the craziness begins. Shiputzim is the word we use when we are talking about renovations - and I have just begun to leshapetz (renovate) my flat. Three days into the job and I am already asking myself "WHY?". Don't ask. Or as Marallyn and I sometimes say - "dun't esk".

Wasn't my flat beautiful enough as it was? Why can't I leave well-enough alone? Why do I need this meshugas (craziness)? Well - because I want something new and modern and beautiful - and if I get through this with my sanity intact - it will all be new and modern and beautiful.

...and because I wanted a new refrigerator - a very big - VERY BIG - "Sharp" refrigerator - stainless - four-door - and VERY BIG!! So - in order to make room for this new member of my family we had to break a wall in my kitchen - what a dirty, messy job. The dust doesn't end. It's in everything.

Why just stop there? I'm putting down new floors in the whole flat, changing all my front windows - putting in a new en-suite bathroom (a very dramatic bathroom I might tell you) - building a big storage unit for all my "stuff" (serving platters and serving dishes and all the "stuff" I use when I have dinner parties) - moving my living-room furniture around (which is why I need the new storage unit so that I can get rid of the one in the living room) so that I can fit in a large dining area (which, of course, means buying a new, large, dining table) - building more book shelves for my ever-growing collection of books - and on and on and on.

I'll tell you about my cast of characters. We'll begin with Menashe - my architect - who is one of the sons of one of the best-known restaurant families in the city - but you already knew that everything I do is - somehow - tied in with food. He's half Parsi and half Turkish. Incidentally, I've eaten at his family's restaurant hundreds of times over the years I've been here - and like the food very much - so that part works for me.

I like him because he knows what he's doing - is very professional - and he listens to what I have to say. He doesn't always agree with me - but he gives me the courtesy of listening and discussing. And he didn't run in horror when I presented him with three single-spaced typewritten pages of what I wanted to do. Some things are do-able - some things not - we compromise.

I wanted to begin this job a month or so ago but Menashe wanted me to wait until a particular kablan (contractor) was free to work for me. And was he ever right. He brought me Avi - a Kurdi - who brought with him Shimshon - also a Kurdi. I cannot believe what yekkes (from the German word for 'jacket' - which is used in Israel to describe someone who is very exact and precise) they both are. Suits me just fine. I've never seen people who work with such care and precision - just my type of people.

And Avi also brought me his father - Shmuel - an old-time cabinet-maker - who is also a Kurdish yekke. Couldn't be better.

Last - but not least - is Rachel - who is my source for floor tiles and wall tiles and bath-tub and sink and faucets - Moroccan - who is like everyone's Mama - she worries about every little thing....the right tiles - the correct roba (grout) to use - finding me the bathtub I wanted when everyone said it wasn't available - and a voice of calmness and sanity. Nothing seems to faze her.

And so it begins. Will keep you up to date on the progress. Wish me well.

Yalla, Bye.

AM YISRAEL IS CRYING

2008-07-16T12:14:00.002+03:00

Am Yisrael (the people of Israel) is crying. Just a few hours ago we received the bodies of our two dead soldiers - Ehud Goldwasser and Eldad Regev - in return for the release of one of the most vicious murderers, Samir Kuntar - alive.

Not to mention that we still haven't received any definitive word about the fate or whereabouts of Ron Arad.... which was promised to us as part of this deal.

Not to mention that we are still trying to obtain the release of Gilad Shalit.

I won't go into all the whys and wherefors of this travesty - you have all read every word about it in your newspapers.

What I will say, however, is that we must change our government now - and change the way we deal with the issue of our kidnapped soldiers and the terrorists we have in our prisons.

How Nasrallah must be laughing at us. And how this one-sided exchange must be giving all the terror groups hope. Hamas, Fatah, Hezbollah - and anyone else who is planning to kidnap our soldiers and civilians - only have to know that we will accede to their demands in return for dead bodies, one or two photographs and some old bones.

How very sad for the families involved - never to know the fate of their loved ones. But - we must send a message that we will consider releasing terrorists "with blood on their hands" - or any terrrorists for that matter - only for our captives who are returned to us alive. And we must verify that fact. Where was the world during this exchange? Where was the Red Cross? Where was our government?

Dear Goldwasser Family, Dear Regev Family - I - and all of Israel - cry for you and with you today.

May you be counted among the mourners of Zion and Jerusalem.

Rena

VA'AD BAYIT - or instant insanity - part 4

2008-07-15T16:35:00.003+03:00

In my last "VA'AD BAYIT" post I told you that we would have our assifa clalit (Annual General Meeting) on July 8th. We had the meeting - although not at my house as I had planned - because I'm starting my shiputzim (renovations) shortly and my flat is not exactly organized at the moment....as you can well imagine. (More about the shiputzim as time goes on.)

In case you had forgotten, I am the Rosh Va'ad (head of the building committee) - and as such, I am in charge of everything pertaining to the building. And I mean everything. And I don't want to be the Rosh Va'ad any more. So - I began the meeting by saying "I resign". "No, you can't". "Yes, I can". "What part of 'I resign' don't you understand"? And this went on and on and on - and to put you out of your misery - yes - I agreed to continue as Rosh Va'ad.

You will say that I have no strength of character - and you will be right. I hate being Rosh Va'ad - I don't want to be the mommy of the building any more - I want to go back to being a private person. But - and here's the BIG BUT - I don't have to do it all alone any more. This time around I actually managed to enlist some help. This time around I actually have a Va'ad (committee). Two other owners have agreed to be an active part of the committee with me - that makes three of us instead of just me - and one owner has agreed to do the books. I think that this time they really believed me - and I really was prepared to resign. In fact - I was looking forward to it.

That's the big thing - I'm ashamed to admit it but I don't even know how to balance a checkbook. I keep records - for the building - in triplicate. Why in triplicate? Because I don't know what I'm doing and that way I have my own system of knowing what comes in - but I'm not always sure of what goes out. Some bills are paid by me - some bills are paid by the bank - I see numbers and my eyes glaze over.

So - we are at the beginning of a new regime. I will never have to ask anyone for money again. And that means NEVER. I will never have to balance a checkbook again. And that means NEVER. I will never have to lose sleep about the people who don't want to pay - that's someone else's problem.

All I have to worry about now is running the building. And to celebrate that, I'm having someone in tomorrow to take pictures of a pipe which we think has broken underground and which is causing a major leak. In the whole scheme of things that should be a snap.

By the way - in the "it can only happen in Israel" department - yesterday Marallyn and I were driving to visit her son and daughter-in-law for a barbecue - yes, another Kurdi barbecue - to celebrate Sweetsie-Tootsie's (her grandson) birthday. Between us we have absolutely no chush kivoon (sense of direction). Give us directions and we'll follow them to the letter - but don't ask us to improvise. So - just as we got to the street where we have to turn "right" - the police waved us off. Why? This is a quiet, completely residential neighborhood. What can be happening? Well - I'll tell you. A new torah scroll was being delivered to the neighborhood synagogue. That's a reason to close a street?

What would we do without cell phones? We called Sweetsie-Tootsie's mother - several times I might tell you - and finally made it to their house. As in all these new developments all the buildings look the same - exactly the same. But - Sweetsie-Tootsie and his Dad were outside - home free. Needless to say - all the Kurdim and the three Ashkenazim had a wonderful time.

Yalla, Bye.

A DELICIOUS WEDDING

2008-07-07T10:32:00.005+03:00

Last week my cousin's daughter got married - of course the wedding was miles and miles from my home. Why should it be otherwise? I've only been to three weddings in Jerusalem itself and tthree weddings in "the vicinity" - which means I had to drive for less than one hour.

This wedding was gorgeous - and one of the happiest and jolliest weddings I have ever attended. And - for the most part - the people really dressed up. True - there were some jeans and crop-tops - and an aunt of the bride actually wore blue trousers and her son's cast-off T-shirt. But that's her style - and nothing is ever going to change her.

I was invited to dress at my cousin's house instead of driving for hours in all my finery. My cousin is such a lady - and with such good taste. She knows that I hate to arrive at a big function all alone and so she said to change my clothes at her house, sleep over after the wedding - and we'd all drive to the wedding together. How graceful she is. And how grateful I was. There she was - organizing this event for three-hundred people and also thinking of me.

And she looked gorgeous - as did the bride - who is gorgeous anyway - and her sister - who is also gorgeous anyway.

Everything has changed over the course of the years I've been here - even catering. Weddings used to be interchangeable - all the food was the same and all served the same way. Burgundy table cloths, lots and lots of food at the kabbalat panim (reception) before the chuppa (wedding ceremony) - so that when it was time for the dinner it was impossible to eat a thing. Which didn't matter as the food was usually awful - little oval dishes with indifferent salataim (salads) already on the table, a choice of fish or puff pastry stuffed with liver for the starter and for the main course a choice of reva off (quarter chicken) or tough and stringy pot roast. And the tosafot (side dishes) - all on platters in the center of the table - roast potatoes, rice, grey string beans - you get the picture.

Instead of a lot of heavy food for the reception, waiters passed around light h'ors d'oeuvres - delicious goodies such as kebabs on cinnamon sticks, ceviche in martini glasses, mini vol au vent shells with liver pate and phyllo dough packets with portobello mushrooms which looked like wrapped candies.

But the main courses were something else. Buffet-sit down - white table cloths - glass bowls filled with pebbles and candles - and "stations" to get your food around the perimeter of the room. But each station had another complete main course. With people serving and arranging the portions beautifully so that the guests didn't walk away with their plates looking like an archeological dig - you've seen that awful sight - salads and vegetables and fish and meat and... and... and...all piled on top of each other willy-nilly in case you might miss something.

And the plates were different at each station to fit the food - square plates with a delicate mixture of diced vegetables topped with a filet of succulent fish - large round bowls with a bed of red lentils topped with beautifully roasted eggplant topped with a mixture of chickpeas and pargiot (boned chicken thighs) topped with baby greens and a delicate dressing (one of the most beautifully presented and delectable dishes I have ever eaten!) - round plates with entrecote steak served with roasted potatoes and pears(!) - larger round plates on which was an "order" of 'burgers and chips (french fries) all properly garnished - and smaller bowls with noodles and rice and stir-fried vegetables in a coconut milk sauce. On each table was an assortment of square bowls with beautiful and tasty and original salads. I could have made a meal of the salads alone.

For dessert there was a coffee bar set up with baristas preparing espresso - and teas - and butz (a particularly Israeli coffee which looks like mud - which is what butz means). And, again, pass-around platters of miniature desserts - as many of us had dispersed to the tables and sofas set up outside - and so that people could sample lots of things.

A nice touch - a red wheel barrow filled with shiny buckets of all kinds of candies was set out for all the noshers after dinner.

The bride and groom were adorable - the guests had fun - the food was delicious - the taklitan (DJ) was great - the music was wonderful - a perfect start to what I hope will be a perfect life for the young couple.

Yalla, Bye.

A QUICK FIX

2008-06-29T15:03:00.003+03:00

I just had to share this with you. One day when I was in a real bind - guests were coming and there was not a piece of cake or a cookie in the house - I called Marallyn in a panic. Really - who else do I call when I'm in a panic? What to do - what to do? And she gave me the following recipe. As a matter of fact - I used it the other day when I had - literally - 30 minutes from the time I walked into the house at 7:00 PM until my very unexpected guests were showing up at 7:30 PM. Talk about short notice.

5-MINUTE MICROWAVE BROWNIES

Melt 150 gr. butter or margarine with 100 gr. bittersweet chocolate. Mix well to combine. (NOTE: 456 grams = 1 pound. 150 gr = just over 5 ozs. 100 gr = 3 1/2 ozs.)

Add in following order - mixing after each addition:
1 Cup sugar
2 large eggs - lightly beaten
1 tsp. vanilla
1 Cup flour (sift flour & cocoa together over mixture)
1/2 Cup cocoa - unsweetened

Optional additions - total of 1 Cup
chopped nuts
raisins
dried cherries
chocolate chips
white chocolate chips

Grease an 8" x 8" glass baking dish and put in mixture

Put in microwave on high for 3 1/2 minutes - check for "doneness". If not done, bake in 30-second increments until done. Depending on your microwave oven, you should not need more than 5 minutes total. The mixture should not be completely dry.

Remove from oven - let stand 2 1/2 minutes - then cover with plastic wrap.

Cut into squares when cool.

NOTES: (1) If you have a large microwave-safe bowl, melt the chocolate and butter in that. Then just add the other ingredients and mix with a whisk or a large wooden spoon or a large spatula. No need for an electric mixer. (2) Line your glass baking dish with baking paper - bottom and sides. When it's time to cut the brownies, lift the paper out of the baking dish and place on a cutting board - it's much easier to cut into squares on a flat surface.

Incidentally, Marallyn gave me the recipe without the chocolate (only with the cocoa) and the vanilla. It's much tastier with. I mention margarine in place of butter only if you keep kosher and want to serve this after a meat meal. "Butta is betta." (Thanks, Mike Meyers.)

These also freeze well and then go into the microwave for a few seconds when you want to serve at a later date. However - did you ever eat frozen brownies straight from the freezer? One of life's guilty pleasures - believe me.

Yalla, Bye.

SHPITZIM V'TUSSIKIM

2008-06-21T10:30:00.003+03:00

The other day I went to the butcher to buy a chicken. Now why is this so important? Because I discovered something about being an American - albeit an American / Israeli.

There are many butchers in Jerusalem but I only shop at a few of them - the creme-de-la-creme - you should excuse a dairy expression in a blog about meat. I sometimes shop at Yankele - who is married to an American and understands how Americans like their meat cut. So that when I ask for a first-cut brisket he knows exactly what I want. Then there is "Vered HaTzela" - which is a beautiful clean shop with beautiful clean meat - but the butchers aren't particularly friendly - although Ros does buy the most delicious entrecote roasts there - at a price that doesn't leave you with sticker shock.

Then there is Shuk Machane Yehuda (the outdoor market) where I usually buy my chickens and chicken parts - including feeselach (chicken feet) which you can't find anywhere else.

And finally - but most important - there are the Shoshani Brothers located in the Moshava (the German Colony) - across the road from my favorite cafe - "Caffit". Chaim and Rami - the Shoshanis - are the antithesis of any butchers you have ever seen. Both are tall and good-looking and are always immaculately dressed and coiffed and manicured. They don't wear aprons - they don't even wear white butcher's coats. And there is never a spot of blood or meat or fat on them - they might as well be hairdressers - so beautifully turned out are they. And that is where I do most of my meat shopping as well as ordering my turkeys for Thanksgiving.

So the other day I happened to be at the Post Office around the corner and decided to buy a whole chicken and was too lazy to drive all the way to the shuk - so I went into "Shoshani" for the bird.

Now - I have to digress for a minute and tell you about chickens in Israel. You can buy whole chickens - chicken parts - chicken innards - skinless, boneless chicken breasts and thighs, chicken schnitzels - but, interestingly, not bone-in-skin-on chicken breasts unless it's a special order - but you can buy thighs and drumsticks with the skin and bones. However - chicken wings and whole chickens with wings atttached are another story....as are tussikim (tushies) - which are commonly referred to as the Parson's Nose - or as my Mother used to say when she was being particularly refined - "the part that goes over the fence last". The butchers throw that part away.

As for the shpitzim (that's the little third joint at the tip of the wing) - they throw those away, too. Why you might very well ask? Because Israelis don't like those parts! In fact - they even cut the chicken wings in half. Heresy! You need the little shpitzim when you want to fold in the wings when you are roasting so the wings don't flop around - and besides - they taste so good - as do the tussikim.

So - when Chaim brought out my chicken I checked for the shpitzim - which only occasionally remain attached by mistake. "What are you looking for?" asked Rami, as I rooted around in the bag. "The shpitzim and the tussik", I replied. At which point the brothers burst out laughing. They told me that only the Americans ask for those parts - and as they have a large American clientele they always leave those parts attached.

Little did I know. I have bought my last chicken in the shuk. From now on all my chickens will come from the Shoshanis - with the shpitzim and the tussikim attached.

No matter that I came here thirty-three years ago - and despite the fact that in many ways I am very Israeli - and despite the fact that Rami and Chaim and I always speak in Hebrew - deep down where it really counts - I will always be an American. There's no getting away from that.

GO BACK TWO BLOGS......

2008-06-16T11:59:00.002+03:00

Here's a little test for you to see if you really read my blogs. Two blogs ago I wrote about a restaurant that Riva and I were going to go to - and that I'd let you know what we thought of it. Remember?

We went - and I thought it was so wonderful that I sent a rave review into "e-luna". If you don't know what "e-luna" is - it's a site here in Israel listing most of the good kosher restaurants in all the cities in Israel - containing reviews and a place to click onto to get discount coupons for the restaurants. Now - don't think for a moment that because you can get a discount coupon the restaurants are iksa (yechy) - some of them are really, really fine - as was "Etzel Pini Bachetzer".

I won't give you the entire review - you can read that on "e-luna" - what I will tell you is that the food and service and ambience were more than even I expected. And I had eaten at the restaurant in their first incarnation in town when it wasn't kosher. "e-luna" was even nice enough to include my blog address in with the review. So now you know - read the review and go to the restaurant.

In that same blog I mentioned that I was going to visit my cousin, Dizza, for Shavuout. The whole day was a joy - from beginning to end. First of all - it was the first time I had taken my car out for a really long drive - Herzliya Pituach doesn't count as it's only forty-five minutes away - this ride was about one and one half hours. The car drives like a dream - OK - I won't bore you with all my raves about my new car. Second - radio station "88" had an all-day jazz-blues program - all the greats - the Dorseys, Grady Tate, Ella Fitzgerald, Art Tatum - programs from the "Blue Note" in New York where I (mis)spent a lot of my youth - all the music brought back such memories. And the program was still on when I drove home in the evening.

And third - but not last - I got to spend time with my cousins Dizza and Ufaz and their youngest daughter, Daphy - whose middle name is Rena - after me. So I loved her even before she was born because I knew she would carry my name. Believe me when I tell you that Dizza and I didn't stop talking for one minute in seven hours. In between we ate - Ufaz (nicknamed Pazzi) joined us for a while - and then Daphy joined us - so the three women had a real girl-talk fest.

Daphy's older sister is getting married on July 1st, so of course I had to see what they were wearing. Then we discussed our mutual friends, family, and bras. Yes - bras. Imagine, if you will, three women sitting around the table pulling our shirts up - or down - to compare our bras. It seemed a perfectly normal thing to do - wasn't it? (By that time Pazzi had left the table - it wasn't a conversation for him.)

Now it's back to real life - no more chaggim (holidays) for a while. But a very busy time nevertheless - trying to get ready for our Annual Meeting - dance concerts - music concerts - dinners - breakfasts - and so it goes.

Yalla, Bye.

MY FABULOUS CM

2008-06-08T07:04:00.002+03:00

As all of my regular readers know by now - I have the best CM (computer mumche {expert}) in the entire world. He's about seven feet tall, has the face of an angel, a personality to match - and is absolutely brilliant. He's a student at the Hebrew University and is doing his PhD now. Not fair of me, I know - but I hope he takes years and years to finish because when he does finally finish studying and gets a "real" job he won't have time to be my CM any more.

Last week my printer died. Well. it didn't really die - it just ran out of ink - but it was dead as far as I was concerned. What to do? New ink costs 250 shekels. A whole new printer-fax-copier-scanner costs only 1000 shekels. A new machine it was.

So on Thursday he met me at "Office Depot" and we chose a new machine - actually, he chose the machine and I just went along for the ride. And to pay the bill.

Yesterday he came to hook it up. He took everything out of the enormous box - knew exactly what every little piece and wire was for - and went to work. The machine is an HP - and came with completely detailed instructions in two large booklets - two because they were printed in so many languages - not one of which was English. Sixteen languages - German, Italian, Finnish, Greek, Turkish, Flemish, Swedish, Portugese, Hebrew - you get the picture - but not in English.

Not that it would have made any difference to me - there is no way that I could have installed it by myself. You have to "introduce" the printer to the computer - each operation has another introduction process. A question - why can't you just plug the thing in and let it get to work? It also comes with a CD - not much help to me either as the language on the CD keeps changing from English to Hebrew.

Now - I speak both English and Hebrew - but anything technical is Greek to me. Believe me when I tell you that I can barely put in a lightbulb by myself - it's that bad.

But I'm back in business now and I just sent out an important fax. My old printer went "zzzhhhh" - and the fax was sent. This printer goes "glp glp gurgle blp blp" - and the fax goes out in a fraction of the time it took with the old machine. Oh yes - it also prints in color - I'll have to try that one of these days when I get up the courage.

N.B. My friend, Brenda, told me that I made a mistake in my last posting - our Annual General Meeting is in July - not June as I wrote the other day - so I have another month before all the screaming begins.

Yalla, Bye.

VA'AD BAYIT - or instant insanity - part 3

2008-06-04T13:27:00.002+03:00

The other day my friend, Judi, said to me that I wasn't writing as often as I used to. She's right. But not because I don't want to. It's because I simply haven't had time. And why not you might well ask? Because I'm trying to run this damned building - that's why.

My full-time jobs never took up so much of my time - not to mention all my free time. I have become the "Mommy" of this building. A leak? Call Rena. Someone found car keys in the parking lot - next to a car - who does the car belong to? Call Rena. Actualy - ring Rena's doorbell at 11 o'clock at night. (By the way - Rena actually knew whom the car belonged to.) A smell of gas? Call Rena.

It's now time for our Assifa Clalit (our Annual General Meeting). And guess who has to bring it all together? Rena!!! To make matters even more complicated my printer has stopped printing. I think it's run out of ink but, since I wanted to buy one of those all-in-one machines anyway - the kind that's a printer-copier-fax-scanner - I called my trusty CM, (computer mumche) Elad, and we're going to look for a new one tomorrow.

All well and good except I had to get something printed today. So - I typed it up on my computer - sent it on to my friend, Riva, as an "attachment"- she will print it out on her printer - bring it to me this evening when we meet for dinner - and I'll take it to the stationery store tomorrow and have all the copies made. Something's wrong with this picture. Aren't all these machines meant to make one's life easier?

Anyway - on to the Annual General Meeting. I'm holding the meeting at my house - aren't I the "Mommy" of the building? It's a good thing I'm going to do some shiputzim (renovations) here because I expect there to be a lot of bloodshed. The meetings are never calm one way or the other - people really hate each other in this building. No one ever wants to let anyone else speak. To make matters worse the cost of heating-oil is absolutely exhorbitant and I don't know how we're ever going to pay to keep the central heating going this coming winter.

So - I will suggest shutting down the central heating and having each flat heat independently. Do you hear the screaming already? But I'm a good kid - you knew that before I said it. I did all the research - had meetings with many people - made countless phone calls - and I will offer the owners four alternative methods of heating their flats.

The meeting will be on June 8th. If you don't hear from me after that you'll know that the meeting really caused some bloodshed.

Now you know why I haven't had time to write. In the meantime I'll just chug along - dinner tonight with Riva - at a restaurant I used to eat at when it was in the center of town - not kosher. Then Pini closed the restaurant and moved to Tel Aviv. He's back in Jerusalem - not far from my house now - with a new restaurant - kosher this time (Riva's one of my friends for whom I keep my house kosher) - we'll see how it is - have heard good reports about it. Will let you know.

Speaking about letting you know - I told you three weeks ago that I was on a diet - yet again - and would keep you up-to-date on my progress. So far I have lost 4 kilos - about 8 pounds. Eleven more kilos to go - hope I stick to it this time. I'm really really trying. But - dinner out tonight - breakfast with Marallyn on Friday - a Brit Mila on Sunday - to my cousin Dizza's on Monday for Shavuout. Not to mention a reception last night at which I ate only some crudites (raw vegetables) without the dips and drank diet cola (ugh); lunch out with Shosh, at which I ate a small Salade Nicoise; dinner out with Ros - 3 spare ribs with no sweet BBQ sauce, salad and 1/2 baked potato - and so it goes.

Did I mention that Shavuout is the holiday where you eat only dairy foods - and all things good and fattening made with cheese?

Yalla, Bye.

BITS 'N' PIECES

2008-05-23T16:14:00.002+03:00

- Myra and I went to a new (for me) tailor shop to have a pair of her trousers shortened. While I was waiting for her to try on the trousers I looked around at the signs posted on the walls - in English and in Hebrew. As I am a native English-speaker, my eye naturally goes to the English first. I noticed a sign that read "Cutting and Sewing of Pattern for Filled Outfit". What the hell did that mean? When I read the Hebrew it simply stated "We sew custom-made clothes". Who knew.

Almost as good as the heading on one page of the English menu at my favorite cafe - "Caffit". They offer "Beagle Toasts". Amazing - as it's a kosher dairy restaurant - no meat served at all.

- When I first came here we all carried plastic baskets to the market to bring our groceries home. There were no such things as plastic bags. No paper bags. You supplied your own reuseable baskets. With all the harm plastics are doing to the universe today we are, once again, being asked not to use plastic. So - we are all going "green". Two weeks ago Ros brought me a wonderful present - two "green" - literally and figuratively - shopping bags - to go with my new "green" hybrid car. And now I'm a good citizen and carry my own reuseable bags to the supermarket. I do feel so virtuous.

- Here's something I need some feedback on. No names or other identifying descriptions will be used - to protect the innocent. I have some friends who throw several big parties each year. I actually enjoy the parties - I know most of the guests and the new people I meet there are always fun and interesting. And the food is mostly great - because the guests supply the food. We are all asked to bring some dish or other. Sometimes we are told what to bring - sometimes it's Russian Roulette - you know - seventeen people bring pasta salad, for instance. It's not that we say "Is there anything we can bring?" We are expected - told - to bring something as our price of admission.

I always kept my mouth shut as I felt that I was being petty. However - why should I have to worry about what to serve when I have guests at my house and also have to worry about what I have to cook when I'm invited to someone elses house? But I'm a good sport - as is everyone else who goes to the parties - and we all show up with our offerings.

Until recently. I was with some friends who also go to the parties. And someone said "Have you received your invitation to bring your own food?" No names were mentioned. And all of us - as one - burst out laughing. Because we all knew who was being referred to - and, it turns out, we all resent it to some degree or other. After all - all of us are good cooks - all of us have guests - and all of us provide all of the food and drink at our own homes when we do the inviting.

Now mind you - I'm very generous. I always ask if my host or hostess would like me to provide some specialty of mine. And sometimes they say "yes" and sometimes they say "no". But it's my option to have offered - theirs to accept or decline my offer - and my invitation isn't contingent upon what food I am told to provide.

So here's my question. How do you feel about always being invited - along with a dish? And by that I don't mean a chateech or chateecha (Hebrew slang for a "dishy" male or female - literally a "piece"). Wouldn't you rather be invited just as a guest - with or without an "offering"? Or don't you care one way or the other? Are all of us being petty?

At least now I know I'm in good company.

Yalla, Bye.

IF YOU WANT SOMETHING DONE.....

2008-05-10T10:21:00.004+03:00

If you want something done - do it yourself. Last week I told you that our second chicken wings restaurant went out of business. What to do? My mouth was just watering for grilled chicken wings. Marallyn was dreaming about wings. Who knew if the Ben Moshe family would provide our "fix".

Last Sunday Marallyn and I went to the Mall for our weekly breakfast and afterward to "the museum" - otherwise known as Mega b'Ir (Mega in the City) supermarket. And we headed straight for the meat department where we bought chicken wings. I took them home - cleaned them - which is no small task in Israel as all poultry comes with millions of pin-feathers still left on - and put them in the freezer until the day before Yom Haatzmaut (Independence Day) when we were going to celebrate with Marallyn's Kurdi family.

On Wednesday I marinated them - a very simple marinade - but absolutely delicious - believe me. Just mix olive oil, some fresh lemon juice and chopped fresh rosemary - don't ask me amounts - who measures - schmoozhle (mix) it all together and marinate the chicken. (If you really want amounts, use about 1/3 the amount of lemon juice as oilve oil and about 1 tsp. of chopped rosemary ) Bubbie Chana and Marallyn's husband inhaled them - so did Marallyn and I and everyone else.

But do you think that's all we ate? Not at all. We ate Marallyn's famous chopped vegetable salad, her sister-in law's matboucha (a tangy salad of cooked tomatoes, peppers and spices), hummus (ground chickpeas with tehina), tehina (gound sesame seed paste), salat chatzilim (eggplant salad with tehina), pickles, olives and pita. That was it for the healthy vegetable part.

Then came the serious food...all done on the mangal (grill) - manned by one of Marallyn's brothers-in law and her son - the father of Sweetsie Tootsie and Sweetsie Girl. We ate - in no particular order - kebabs, regular steak, entrecote steak, chicken livers, shkaydeem (sweetbreads), skewers of beef, lamb chops, brains (only I ate them !), lamb fat (yes, dear readers - pieces of lamb fat grilled until crispy - don't knock it until you've tried it) - and wings.

And we finished with watermelon - cold and sweet and juicy - the perfect ending to all that meat.

You should understand that this took hours and hours - you can't ingest that amount of food in twenty minutes. This was an all-day proposition. And there was still food left over. But you can never prepare "just enough" - what happens if another contingent shows up unexpectedly? Which is actually what happened. Not to worry - we had enough food.

And we didn't eat non-stop. Oh, no. We took time to talk and laugh and play with the kids. But after about five hours we called it a day. Marallyn was smart - she wore pants with an elasticized waist. I - on the other hand - had to undo the button on my jeans!

Now it's really crunch time. I began a diet yesterday - for the millionth time. My cousin's daughter is getting married in seven weeks - and I simply must get into my outfit. Will let you know how that goes.

Yalla, Bye.

REQUIEM FOR A CHICKEN WING - part deux

2008-05-03T18:09:00.002+03:00

Some time ago I wrote a REQUIEM FOR A CHICKEN WING bemoaning the closing of my favorite chicken-wing place - "Poyo Loco".

But as Judi reminded me yesterday all was not lost. There was still a wonderful place at the "Bilu Center" - near Rehovot - that served chicken wings. In fact - they served anything "chicken". Chicken cutlets, whole chickens, half chickens, quarter chickens - and chicken wings prepared in several different styles.

Have you noticed that I am writing in the past tense?

This morning Judi and Marallyn and I decided to drive all the way to Rehovot - not exactly next door to Jerusalem - to go to "Nando's" to have their chicken wings for lunch. A nice outing for a Saturday. The "Bilu Center" is like one of those big outlet malls in the States - all the national chains have shops there - clothing, housewares, books - you name it and they have it. And it's open on Saturday.

So - off we went. And when we got there we even found a parking space almost immediately. A big space at that so that there was no chance anyone next to me would scratch my new car. (OK - so I'm a bit neurotic.) We wandered around - into and out of stores - always in the direction of "Nando's"

I tell you - somebody up there doesn't want me to eat chicken wings. When we arrived at what used to be the restaurant - it was closed. Not only closed - but half torn down. The three of us were in shock. We were almost in tears. And we hadn't eaten breakfast so that we would have room for our beloved chicken wings. So we were also starving.

Judi is the only clever one of us - she carries "noshies" in her bag. But Marallyn and I had nothing. And Judi didn't really have enough to make a lunch for the three of us. What to do? We three quick-thinking ladies called the "Black Steer" - the place for fabulous ribs - and made a reservation. But we were still starving and we still had a long way to go to get to the restaurant.

So - Marallyn and I had our vorschpeis (appetizer) standing in the middle of the street. Marallyn treated us both to big, juicy hot dogs with ketchup and mustard and sauerkraut. We practically inhaled them we were so hungry.

So that when we got to the "Black Steer" we didn't have our usual salad to start - remember, we had all had our vorschpeis. The three of shared a whole order of spare ribs with chips (french fries) and onion rings - but - we drank diet cokes!!

And so this is my final REQUIEM FOR A CHICKEN WING - there is no other place for great wings that I know of - there will be no PART TROIS to this saga.

But wait a minute - next Thursday is Yom Haatzmaut (Independence Day) and, as I am every year, I'm invited to Marallyn's brother-in-law's for our national barbecue celebration. Do you think he'll have chicken wings?

Yalla, Bye.

PESACH HAS COME AND GONE - I'M STILL HERE

2008-04-29T17:35:00.004+03:00

Whew - that was a marathon. I shopped and cooked and cleaned and served and shopped some more and...and...and...and we ate and ate and ate. Diet time now.

Before you even ask - the Seder was wonderful. In addition to my old friends we also had a German journalist as a guest. So she didn't like it so much - what can we do? I think we were all aliens to her - despite the thumbnail sketches I gave her of all my guests - who are a pretty terrific lot I might tell you - the article she wrote about us made us look like a bunch of superficial idiots. That despite the fact that among us were three PhDs, one MD, several professionals, one artist, and two business people.When I took exception to the tone of the article she actually apologized - and journalists don't do that sort of thing. Yossi disinvited her to his kibbutz - and it takes a lot to make him angry. So we'll just forget about her and I'll tell you about the Seder.

There were twelve of us. Yossi conducted the Seder using my Haggada and one from his kibbutz. It was obvious he put a lot of work and thought into it - and it turned out beautifully. The evening was everything I could have wished for. Do you want to hear my menu? After the hard-boiled eggs and charoset (the mixture of apples, walnuts, cinnamon and sweet wine signifying mortar) and bitter herbs during the reading of the Haggada we ate: gefilte fish, chopped liver, chicken soup and knaidlach (matza balls), pickled tongue, pot roast, sweet and sour red cabbage, broccomini (sort of like broccoli rabe but not bitter), mashed potatoes with fried onions, dried fruit compote and meringue cookies - every bit of it made by me. And matza and more matza and more matza. And wine - lots of it.

Everyone left by 1:30 AM but I was so up from the evening that I didn't get to bed until 4:00 AM.

And then it was chol ha moed (the intervening days of the holiday - until the last night on the following Friday). And every day there was something else. Out to lunches and dinners - all with my friends - and trying to get aroud in Jerusalem by car which was almost impossible. I think every Israeli not from Jerusalem came to visit. The police arbitrarily closed streets - one never knew from one minute to the next which street was going to be closed off - for whatever reason. We were never told. We arrived late to each and every appointment. But what fun we had.

Then it was Friday - the last night of chag (holiday) for Israelis. So, of course, it was time for me to do another dinner. This one was very simple. Menu? OK. An orange soup - carrots, sweet potatoes and dalorit (a kind of squash) with coconut cream, rolled turkey roast, fresh asparagus, roasted potatoes, apple cake and tea with nana (mint). And more matza. And more wine.

Now it's acharay ha chag (after the holiday). Remember I once told you that in Israel everything is either acharay ha chag or lifnay ha chag (before the holiday) - either way nothing ever gets done. Anyway - it's acharay and time for my diet to begin. However - Ros and I went out to lunch yesterday and ate all the things we didn't get to eat during Pesach - and tomorrow night Yoav and Ernesto are having a dinner party. There goes the diet again. It will have to be acharay acharay.

Yalla, Bye.

MY PERFECT PESACH PRESENTS

2008-04-15T07:33:00.004+03:00

With all the balagan (mess, turmoil) in this run-up week to Pesach two very nice things have happened to me - well, three actually. My US tax returns have been finished on time and are in the mail to the relevant parties in the States. Yes, I'm feeling very poor today in case you're interested - I can put the money to better use than the U.S. government can - believe me.

The second perfect thing - or maybe it should be the first perfect thing - is that my new car arrived yesterday. It is gorgeous - lovely - beautiful - and brand spanking new. It even has that sexy new-car smell. It's silver and is shiny and clean and arrived with only 12 kilometres on it - it was only driven from "there" to "here" - right in front of my house. Now - that's what I call service.

Nevermind that it has so many bells and whistles that it will take me forever to figure it out. There is, of course, a driving mode for going downhill on a highway. But - there is also a driving mode for driving early in the morning and for driving in underground garages. Who knew?

ELDAN (the company who leases me my car) called me last week to ask me if I wanted them to install a flech - flach? - floch? ( the thingie to which you attach your diburit [speaker for the cellular phone]). "A what?" I asked. Never heard that word before - I think it's a flech - but I'm not sure. Anyway - they installed it and today I'm having the diburit installed. It's highly illegal - not to mention very expensive if you are caught - to speak on a hand-held phone while driving. Just one more thing to do before I have to begin cooking for the Seder.

And the third lovely event is that a journalist from Germany who is working at HAARETZ - one of our national newspapers - found my blogs and liked what she read. She called me and asked to meet with me so I could explain Pesach to her - which is very complicated, if you remember reading my last year's Pesach blog....Ashkenazi - Sepharadi - customs - foods. We had lunch this week at "Caffit" - of course at "Caffit" - where else - and she was so charming and so interesting that I invited her to the Seder. She's going to write about Pesach for her paper in Germany so I thought she might as well see - and be part of - the "real thing". An exciting benefit to writing a blog. And really fitting as I lived in Germany for more than two years and celebrated two Seders there.

I'm just carrying on a family tradition as my Mom very often invited strangers to our Seders. It should be an interesting Seder as we will be such a diverse group of people. And now I'd better get on with my day - there are a million things to do before I begin the massive cooking and preparing. The soup is already made and in the freezer - as is the sweet and sour red cabbage. That only leaves fourteen more things to cook! Hope I'm ready on time.

Hag Sameach (Happy Holiday).

Yalla, Bye.

"DANCE WITH ME HENRY"

2008-04-11T06:48:00.003+03:00

Do you remember the old song "Dance with me Henry"? Just call this "Write to me Julie"!

Those of you who read this blog regularly know I have two major failings. I have absolutely no Choosh Kivoon (sense of direction). And - I am utterly and completely lacking in any understanding of anything technological or technical - are they the same thing?

Anyway - yesterday I received a "comment" on my blogs from Julie - which I wanted to answer. I clicked on "moderate this comment" - nothing. I clicked on"publish this comment" - also nothing. I tried to reply to the comment - a further nothing. How will I get in touch with Julie?

What to do? I know - I'll write another blog.

So this blog is to Julie. Julie and her husband are coming to Israel for a visit and would like to hang out with me at my favorite cafe, "Caffit". She loves my blogs and my descriptions of food - long slow-cooked meals like my Chicken Fricassee. We can hang out and talk of this and that - and food - and my trip to the shuk (outdoor market) yesterday with Yoav and Ernesto - which was the most fun I ever had at the shuk.

So Julie - please write to me again and give me your email address. I'd love to hang out with you. And wish you a very Happy Birthday in person.

And do you notice that the font in this blog has now become italic? I'm telling you - there are gremlins in my life - I simply cannot get the font back to regular "ariel". I'm sure any normal person could get the font back - but I? - I simply just can't do it.

Yalla, Bye.

A RUN-UP TO PESACH

2008-04-06T01:49:00.005+03:00

And just why - you might ask yourself - am I writing this at almost two o'clock in the morning? Because a water pipe burst in the garden next to mine - and as I'm the Rosh Va'ad (Head of the Building Committee) it is - automatically - my fault. And because it's my fault - the neighbors are calling me - they are ringing my doorbell (very loudly and insistently) - they are trekking through my flat to the garden - and yelling at me - and yelling and yelling.

Like it's my fault. Well, isn't it? My plumber - Yossi - is a star - he showed up to shut off the water - in the middle of the night, noch (Yiddish for yet) - and was actually pleasant about it. How about that?

So - the water is now turned off. The building is, once again, quiet. Everyone seems to have gone back to sleep. And here I am - up and writing.

While I'm up I'll tell you about Samuel's birthday party. A real run-up to Pesach. Samuel is a first cousin to Stewart - whose birthday party I attended in London two months ago. Samuel celebrated his 60th birthday and also the 30th anniversary of his aliyah (immigration to Israel). And all of the family I was with in London arrived to celebrate with him. Because, not only was it his big celebration but also the wedding of another relative which will take place on Monday. So that this wonderful close-knit family is together, once again - and once again made the trek from London and France and Hong Kong. We Israelis are lucky this time - we only had to drive from Jerusalem and other cities in Israel. Beats flying these days.

And my friends, Pearl and Stewart, are here and will stay on for Pesach. Which is why the Seder will be at my house this year. Everything is tied in to everything else. And the party was only the first of the many get-togethers we will have until the end of April.

The party was in Tel Aviv - actually on the outskirts of Tel Aviv - and I drove there and back and didn't get lost once! That was something of an achievement for me - as you'll know from reading these blogs. Loads of fun people - really good food - dancing to 60's music - a great way to spend a Friday afternoon.

It's now less than two weeks to Pesach. The fish - for gefilte fish - is in the freezer. I already ordered the meat from the butcher. My lists are growing each day. This week the supermarket will have all the Pesach products on the shelves - time for the big shop. All the matzot and matza meal and matza cake flour and potato starch - remember? - no wheat flour and related products. No soya sauce. No icing sugar. No - etc etc etc. My favorite Passover cookbook is on my desk and all of my favorite recipes are ready and waiting.

If the spring rains ever stop my window washer is ready to come - you have to have clean windows for Pesach. Have to get rid of all the chametz (everything that's not kosher-for-Pesach). And once everything is ready - I'll begin my cooking and baking marathon.

I'm beginning to get sleepy - at last. Have to go to bed as the plumber is coming back first thing in the morning. And I must remember not to flush the toilets unless it's something "important" - we have no water. Can you make coffee with Coca-Cola?

Yalla, Bye.

CATCH-UP TIME

2008-03-30T17:20:00.003+03:00

Instead of translating Veni, vidi, vici as "I came, I saw, I conquered" - my brother used to say "I came, I saw, I went". And that's just what he did - and now he's gone back to Canada. We had a wonderful visit - talked and ate and visited and talked some more and ate some more and I threw a big party for him and we went to his in-laws for dinner in Nes Ziona and we went to the Bar Mitzvah in Rehovot and to the reception at Gannot - and then he went. I miss him - we're each other's history - we can say one word and burst into gales of laughter - and only we understand what's so funny.

I'm still driving the "loaner" car from Eldan as my own car isn't yet here - the Toyota Prius Hybrid which I ordered in a light color (the one I'm driving now is black and shows every grain of sand and every bit of dust) - and I just love the car - except for the color. I drove more than 900 kilometres last week and the car is really a dream and gets good gas-mileage - well, it should, it runs most of the time on the auxiliary battery. By the way, the car is called a Toyota Pree-yus High-brid - except it's pronounced by Israelis as Toyota Pee-ree-yus Hee-brid. The same way that Israelis call a Mitsubishi a Meet-see-booshi - go figure.

My nephew says my whole life is a blog - and he's probably right. One day David and I went to the Herzliya Marina and while deciding which boat to buy ( that's a joke) we decided instead to have a light lunch as we were going to Ouri and Devora's for dinner. We just wanted two starters and a salad. I saw on the menu a starter of fried calamari, eggplant and tehina with a tomato salsa - sounded good to me. There were two prices listed 38 / 44. I asked the waiter what the difference in size was between the two prices. No difference in size - one had calamari and the other didn't. So why were there two different prices listed next to the description of the dish and no indication that one had calamari and one didn't? "Kacha zeh" (that's the way it is), he answered. "Doesn't everyone question that?" I asked. "Yes" he replied. "So why not correct the menu?" I queried. "Kacha zeh" he replied - go figure.

I just got a new cell-phone - Bluetooth-enabled so I can speak and hear through an earpiece while I'm driving. I still don't know what Bluetooth is - but I have it. Fine. But I couldn't get it to work. Pushed this - pushed that - you know the drill - doesn't work. So when I went to Ros's for dinner on Friday night I brought the phone and the earpiece with me - surely someone there would know what to do. Her son-in-law, Shimon, asked me if I had activated the Bluetooth thingie in the phone. Nooo - was I supposed to? How was I supposed to do that? How was I supposed to know that? He did it for me. Then I couldn't figure out how to turn the earpiece on and off. Guess what? Ros's grandson Elior - 10 1/2 years old!! - showed me how it works. The kid knows these things - this grownup doesn't.

And that brings us up to date. Pesach is less than three weeks away. I cooked my little heart out for David's party - and now I have to begin shopping and preparing for Pesach. I already have my menu planned - I have my lists made of what I have to buy and what I have to cook for the Seder (my brother says that my lists have lists) - and here I go again. I'll keep you up to date.

Yalla, Bye.

RENA'S ANNUAL CHICKEN FRICASEE DINNER

2008-03-15T08:07:00.003+02:00

I don't know how my Mom or my Grandma did it. Did what? Cleaned kilos and kilos (they cleaned pounds and pounds) of chicken parts - and not just once a year.

This past Wednesday evening I held my "Annual Chicken Fricasee Dinner". And what is that - you might well ask. I like "poor people's food". I eat steaks and roasts and grilled salmon - well, I eat just about everything - as you will have gathered from reading this blog regularly. But what I really love is food that has to be cooked long and slow - dishes that were created to stretch what available food there was to feed lots and lots of people.

After all - what is gefilte fish? Fish that is ground up with onions and matza meal and eggs, formed into "kneidlach" (balls) and poached in a broth made with the bones and heads (the best part!!) and will feed many more people than just the one whole fish served plain. Or chopped liver - chicken livers sauteed and then ground up with eggs and onions and "schmaltz" (chicken fat). And stews? And hearty soups?

And chicken fricasee. A soupy, stewy sort of dish made with chicken giblets - necks and hearts and pupicks (gizzards) and feeslach (chicken feet!!) and wings and little meat balls mixed with rice and a gravy made with loads and loads of onions.

But even before you can begin to cook the fricasee you have to clean all the bits and pieces. Myra found the chicken feet for me in the shuk (open air market). She brought me more than two kilos (over four pounds) which cost the grand sum of 10 Israeli shekels - less than 4 American dollars. There were 82 feet - and I cleaned each and every one. That took four hours. Then I cleaned two kilos - each - of hearts and necks and pupicks and wings which took another four hours. Then I made 60 meatballs - hours more work. And only then did I begin to cook.

Was it worth it? You'll have to ask Myra and Ros and Marallyn and Anne (Bubbie) and Corinne - but not while they're eating. They inhaled the food - it disappeared in no time flat. I only invite those friends who love fricasee - love eating with their fingers and gnawing on the bones. There ain't no other way. For four of us it was a reminder of our middle-European, Ashkenazi backgrounds. Myra, who was born in Israel to German parents and never ate that at home loves the dish. But the most surprising is Corinne - who is Egyptian / Turkish and was born in the Sudan - she inhales it along with rest of us. They're all looking forward to next year - when my fingernails (I ruined my manicure) and I will have recovered from this year's production.

My brother, David, is arriving tomorrow - that's one of his favorite dishes. So - there's fricasee waiting for him in the freezer. And Riva - who is arriving from Canada next week - also has a "care package" waiting for her in the freezer.

I have a really busy week ahead of me. David and I have to catch up on everything - although thanks to SKYPE and emails we speak all the time. But there's nothing like face-to-face. We'll visit friends, eat, talk, and just hang out. Then there's the party I'm throwing for him on Thursday. Then there's dinner at his in-laws in Nes Ziona. Then the Bar Mitzva of his second grandson in Rehovot. Then the Bar Mitzva party in Gannot and then he leaves again. That was quick.

So - I know you'll understand if I don't write for about ten days. Then I'll tell you all about his visit and about my party and what I cooked.

By the way - I just noticed that this is my 103rd blog - who would have thought I had so much to say - and so many people who enjoy reading it?

Yalla, Bye.

TERROR IN A YESHIVA - part II

2008-03-11T09:11:00.003+02:00

In my last blog I wrote about the Palestinians in Gaza celebrating the deaths - the murders - of the eight young men studying in their yeshiva last week.

The following film - on YouTube - came in this morning. I'm not sure that the TV networks worldwide showed this film. Look at it and weep.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=dMxPUzEBWDU

The above link is what you need to click on to see film.

There is nothing more I need to say.

TERROR IN A YESHIVA

2008-03-07T13:54:00.004+02:00

Eight young lives snuffed out. More young men in hospital - some critically injured. Eight funerals today.

Last night the Palestinians struck again - again at innocent civilians. Innocent young men who were celebrating the beginning of the month of Adar and the coming of Purim.

And you are just reading my words - what you are not hearing is that each word is a cry - a scream - a rage at the situation here in Israel. A rage that the UN couldn't bring its august self to condemn that atrocious act. A rage that President Bush believes that the peace talks should continue. A rage that the whole world asks us not to respond "disporportionally" to the bombs from Gaza raining down daily on Sderot and Ashkelon. And just what is "proportionally" might I ask?

I was so proud of the young man, Yitzhak Dadon, who - when asked by a journalist how he managed to kill the terrorist last night - added to his explanation the ironic words "and we thank you Mr. Peres and Mr. Olmert for arming the Palestinians". For that is just what they did. Our fabulous Prime Minister Olmert - whose sons do not serve in our armed forces. Our equally fabulous President Peres - whose great achievement is jetting around the world. And I add my thanks to Mr. Bush and Ms. Rice - who are convinced that they can make peace during their term in office to make them look good. At any cost - to us.

All of us here flip channels during an emergency to see what the world is saying and how the world is reacting. So just imagine my rage when I flipped on to Al-Jazeera and saw the Palestinians in Gaza celebrating in the streets. Yes - celebrating the deaths of these innocents. We Israelis do not celebrate the deaths of innocent civilians. We do not hand out candies and fly flags and dance in the streets when someone - anyone - is killed.

These are the people with whom we are supposed to male peace? These people who do not want peace with us? These people whose avowed aim is to eradicate the State of Israel - not live in peace alongside of us?

Wake up President Bush. Wake up Secretary Rice. WAKE UP WORLD! Today it is Israel - tomorrow it will be you - G-d forbid..

In the meantime - the nation mourns these eight young men.

May their families be comforted among the mourners of Zion and Jerusalem.

Rest in Peace.

REQUIEM FOR A CHICKEN WING

2008-02-27T09:00:00.005+02:00

Ros and I went to see "The Kite Runner" last night - an absolutely wonderful film. I thought I just wept a little - Ros says I was sobbing out loud. I love films that move me - one way or the other. Either I laugh helplessly or I sob because my heart is broken. So either way I feel as if I've gotten my money's worth and have an enjoyable time. (But don't just see the film - read the book if you haven't already done so.)

Then we decided to go to one of our favorite restaurants - "Poyo Loco" (sic) - for one of our favorite meals - grilled chicken wings. You have to understand that I love good food. It can be in an elegant and expensive restaurant or it can be in a small dive - as long as the food is really the best of its kind. And "Poyo Loco" was - note the past tense.

My husband used to say that I had the potential to be a really cheap date. We went to all of the fanciest, best and most elegant restaurants in all parts of the world we visited - and I loved the ambience and the service and the food - what divine food we ate. But - and here's the but - if the truth be told I adore grilled chicken wings and anything made with ground beef. Meat loaf - meatballs - moussaka - hamburgers - stuffed vegetables - and chicken wings.

And so it was that after the film Ros and I had our hearts set on "Poyo Loco's" grilled chicken wings. True - there were many other things on the menu too - but we always ate grilled chicken wings - some salads to start (the best cole slaw ever) and then the wings with rice or chips or a baked potato - and that was it. Sometimes we finished with a glezel tay (Yiddish - glass of tea). And when I drove up the street Ros said, "The place looks dark". And it was dark - out of business!! No prior notice - no nothing. Just a sign in front that stated "In this place will be a branch of 'Avazi':"

Now - "Avazi" is a very respectable steakia (a restaurant that serves meat on skewers and cooked on the grill) - but we already have many steakiot (plural of steakia) in the area. What we don't have are any places that serve grilled chicken wings.

I am heartbroken. Ros was heartbroken. And when I called Marallyn to impart the bad news - she was heartbroken, too.

Rest In Peace dear "Poyo Loco" - you have no idea how much we shall miss you.

Yalla, Bye.

HERE WE GO AGAIN

2008-02-13T19:37:00.003+02:00

You must all know by now that I go into an absolute panic when something inanimate stops working. After all - these things are here to serve me - to make my life easier. Hahahahaha!

So it was that last Friday my second most important TV stopped working. Why second most important? Because the one in my bedroom is the prime TV and the one in the kitchen is the second - the one I turn on when I cook - the one that keeps me company when I'm chopping and peeling and doing all the mindless other tasks one does in a kitchen.

What to do. First I called Marallyn - why not - her TV had a problem a week or two ago and she managed to get it fixed. Turn on - turn off - push this button on the shalat (remote) - push that button on the shalat. Nothing doing. So I called my cable company -"YES" - told them I had a problem - asked for a technayee (repair man) to come to my house. This, you understand, was after "push 1 for Hebrew - push 2 for Russian - push this - push that - finally push 5 for technical help". Told them of my problem. Asked for a technayee. No - it's your shalat they said. And they don't send a technayee for a broken shalat. I have to go to the Post Office to buy a new one!! But not just any Post Office - only certain ones. Be sure to call first to make certain the shalat you want is in stock. Fine - except that not one Post Office I called answered the phone. By that time it was too late to go anyway as the Post Offices were closed for the weekend.

Fast-forward to Sunday. Marallyn and I went out for an early breakfast so we could get to a Post Office - before it closed again. (Our Postal Service is not the most hard-working of industries, you understand.) Called and called - still not answering their phones - so we took a chance and went to the one in Kiryat Yovel - miles from my house but near to Marallyn's. Exchanged my old shalat for a new one - paid my 50 shekels - and went home to call "YES" so they could walk me through putting the code into the new shalat.

Push this - push that - I finally got hold of Uri. OK - push this - push that - "What's happening?", he asked. "Nothing". "Impossible", he replied, "something has to happen". "Is the middle button on your shalat twinkling?" Twinkling? What about flashing? "It's neither twinkling nor flashing". "OK - you need a technayee", he says. Helloooo??? That's what I asked for two days ago. "You'll have someone there within 72 hours". "72 hours? - I'm not sitting at home for 72 hours to wait for someome to come." I was going out with Yoav to a new restaurant in the shuk (market) and I certainly wasn't going to miss that - we always have such a good time. "Give him my cell-phone number and have him call me first." "Oh" says Uri - "why didn't I think of that?"

Late that afternoon the technayee showed up. Made a million phone calls (maybe that's a bit of an exaggeration) - he pushed this and pushed that - guess what - it wasn't the shalat at all - it was my mameer (the cable box).

So now I have a new mameer and also a new shalat - and the TV is working perfectly, thank you very much.

Today I picked up a new car - well, the kind of car I think I'm getting - and I have it for a week or two to see if I like it and then "ELDAN" - the company I lease from, will buy me a new one. The people at "ELDAN" are fabulous - the best company I ever dealt with. The car is a hybrid - a "TOYOTA PRIUS" - drives like a dream. But - you need a degree in car-ology or auto-ology (is there such a thing?) to work the thing.

No key - just a little thingie you insert into the dashboard and then you push this - push that (here we go again with the pushing) - and the car runs. Finally got that straight.

So I called Ros and asked if she wanted to go for a ride in the new car. Nevermind that she's recovering from a strep throat - she's such a good sport that she agreed. As we were driving ,a cab-driver honked at me and told me that I was getting a flat tire!!! Back to "ELDAN". They took us to the hotel next door - bought us coffees - took the car to have the tire changed - and off we went again.

Not so easy - the radio - for which you need another degree (the whole car is push-button everything - all your functions show up on a screen - don't ask) - stopped working. I had hysterics. Ros - ever calm - took the manual and got the radio to work. We both have no idea just how she did it - but it works. She's the only woman I know who can look at a manual and actually understand it. And she doesn't get hysterical like you-know-who.

Now the question remains - am I going to get this car - or not? I love the way it handles - I think I love the way it looks - it's a hatchback - not my favorite model - but it's a "green" car - uses almost no gasoline because it also runs on a battery - I'll drive it for a few weeks and see. Ros and I were going to take it to Herzliya next week - but they are predicting snow and rain for the next several days - if it snows we're not going. I'll keep you posted. In the meantime - I'll keep on pushing this and pushing that - just so I stay in practice.

Yalla, Bye.

"LONDON HEE KEN MECHAKA LEE"

2008-02-10T18:19:00.000+02:00

Once upon a time there was a popular song in Israel that lamented "London hee lo mechaka lee" (London is not waiting for me). I changed the lo (no or not) to ken (yes) and am delighted to tell you that London - or at least my friends in London - were definitely waiting for me. A very short and sweet trip - in which every moment was a joy.

Nevermind that I thought I'd never get out of Israel. Snow was predicted for the night before I was to leave. And when there is snow in Jerusalem - we're quite high up in the hills - the road to the airport is closed. What to do? I called Ouri and Devora - who live along the coast where there is no snow - drove all the way to their house - stayed there overnight - left their house at 5:00 AM for the airport - drove in pounding rain - but rain - no snow - and made it to the airport.

Nevermind, too, that there was so much air traffic that we were stacked over Heathrow for a long time - we finally landed. And I was picked up by one of the cadre of Israeli sherut (shared taxi) drivers to take me into London. Doesn't matter whom you call and order a taxi from - Shimon, Rafi, Moshe, Amnon - whoever is free and is doing the Heathrow run has your name on his list - in Hebrew, of course - and you are duly picked up and delivered.

It was very very cold in London - only rained one day - very windy - but bright and sunny. And it was wonderful to catch up with all my friends (whom I see often) and my friend's friends - whom I hadn't seen since the last simcha (celebration) about two years ago. So I'll tell you what I did. Went to the Royal Academy to see the fascinating "From Russia" exhibition; went to the theatre with Pearl & Stewart and then out to dinner; shabbat dinner at Pearl & Stewart's; shopping; Marble Arch Synagogue early on Saturday morning to see Stewart get an aliya (called up to the torah) in honor of his 80th birthday; dinner with Zoe and Peter and Nicole on Saturday night; "The Party" for Stewart on Sunday; more shopping and the Wallace Collection and lunch with Pearl on Monday - and back to Israel on Tuesday. Short - sweet - fun - and busy.

P&S took me to the theatre on Thursday night - we saw "The Sea" by someone named Bond. Wonderful seats - great cast - Eileen Atkins and David Haig - listed as one of the top five shows to see. Pearl understood it to be one thing - I understood it to be another - Stewart fell asleep - and I cannot begin to tell you what the play was about. It was absolutely incomprehensible - to all of us - well, to Pearl and me anyway - Stewart was asleep. I think it was about a man who believed that aliens were coming to earth - while he was making blue draperies. I kid you not - could I make something like that up?

But dinner - that was something else. The food today in London is wonderful and we had dinner at "St. Albans" - a new restaurant by the people who own "The Ivy" - a good recommendation before you even sit down. Two years ago the restaurant was owned by someone else - sloppy service and indifferent food - now - aboslutely first rate. I always try to eat food abroad that I can't get in Israel - so for me it was a ragout of white beans, mussels and chorizo for a starter and skate wing for my main course - non of it kosher you understand. And as the owners know P&S - we were treated to delicious champagne to begin and S received his dessert with "Happy 80th to Stewart" inscribed in chocolate on his plate. Nice touch.

Shabbat dinner at P&S's was a treat. Twelve of us - all family and me - Pearl cooked - some kind of ethereal creamy soup (I must get the recipe), salmon with grapes, green beans, mange tout, tiny new potatoes and three kinds of dessert. Great food - great company - great evening.

I watch the Food Channel - you knew that - and I often see Antonio Carluccio on one or another program. He owns several restaurants in London - and - great luck for me - Zoe (P&S's almost teen-age granddaughter) and Nicole and Peter (the sister and brother of P&S's son-in-law, who came in from Stockholm)) and I had dinner reservations at one of his places - "Carluccio's Grocery". A sort of Italian bistro - a bit loud - but - oh, what food. I love to share and stick my fork into every one else's plate - and they can do the same with me - and Nicole and Peter feel the same way. So we shared fried calamari and the most perfectly prepared spaghetti and white clam sauce and some kind of chicken dish and another pasta dish and beautifully prepared chicken livers.

And the food at The Party on Sunday? Gorgeous. Simply gorgeous. Champagne and pass-around h'ors d'oeuvres - miniature quiches that literally melted in the mouth, sushi tuna and pesto-soaked tiny mozzarella balls. The luncheon began with a timbale of green peas - creamy and unctuous with micro-greens and a bit of some kind of red coulis - then a large soup-shaped plate with a bed of puree on which were enoki mushrooms and the most sweet and delicious halibut with a light sauce and for dessert a chocolate and raspberry marquise. And with every meal - wine, wine and more wine.

And now back to real life - and, once again, my diet - which really means eating very carefully when I'm at home so that I can eat really well when the occasion presents itself....which it seems to do very often.

Yalla, Bye.

"ELITE" IS - ONCE AGAIN - ELITE

2008-01-26T13:02:00.000+02:00

If you recall my last Blog - I was bemoaning the fact that "Elite" never replied to my letter about the missing piece of chocolate. And I also said that I would let you know what happens in the future.

Well, my dears - on Thursday I answered my phone to hear a representative of "Elite" asking for me. She apologized most heartily for the short-count in the bag of chocolates and actually thanked me for being "such a concerned and alert consumer" and letting them know of the problem. If that's not a great way of handling a consumer complaint I don't know what is. Kudos to them. (By the way - does one always send "kudos" - in the plural? Does anyone ever send a singular "kudo"?)

And - they are mailing me a gift certificate for 50 shekels so I can buy more "Elite" chocolates....and continue to be their customer.

So what do you think I did? I went right out and bought a box of "Max Brenner" chocolates - remember? - I said "Elite" also owned "Max Brenner" - to take as one of my gifts to my friends in London - when I go next week - if I ever get there next week. (They love M.B. chocolates.)

Good segue - wasn't it? This is by way of telling you not to look for my Blog next week - I hope. I expect to be in London to attend the 80th Birthday bash of my friend, Stewart. As we all did for Pearl and Stewart's 50th Wedding Anniversary - we're showing up again from all over the place for his birthday.

BUT - snow is predicted for Tuesday and I have to get to the airport at the crack of dawn on Wednesday. Driving my own car because it get's stored at the airport when I am abroad. Mind you - we have had no winter to speak of and it's already the end of January. So last week it became very cold - now it's finally raining - and next week snow.

I'm the first to admit that we need rain and snow during the winter months - and there has been a real shortage of both this year. But - please, pretty please - can the snow just hold off until my plane takes off on Wednesday morning?

You have to understand that it seldom snows in Israel and when it does - the whole country - or at least the parts that actually get snow - goes into a swivet. Israelis do not know how to drive in snow. Many Israelis have never even seen snow. I'm from New York so I know what snow is - and how to drive in it. But - I had snow tires in the winter - or, at least, snow chains in my trunk. Here - klum (nothing). So - I'll worry and worry until I get to the airport - although that won't do much good because it won't help. If any of you knows a "snow-stay-away dance - start dancing - NOW!

And if you don't get a Blog next weekend - you'll know I made it to the airport and am enjoying myself in London. I'll be in touch when I get back - if I ever get there.

Yalla, Bye.

"ELITE" IS NOT SO ELITE

2008-01-21T12:29:00.000+02:00

It's been a tradition in my house to have a decorative glass jar of chocolates on my coffee table at all times. My husband was a chocoholic and chocolates had to be available at all times. Not a bad addiction in the whole scheme of things.

Anyway - I've carried on the tradition and all who come to visit know that there is always a chocolate fix waiting for them - no need to even ask - just open the jar and take. I usually buy "Toblerone" but every so often I buy something else for variety.

And so it was that a few weeks ago when I was in the supermarket I bought a bag of chocolates to replenish my stash. There were all kinds of sales going on and I spent quite some time checking the bags of chocolates and their prices relative to the number of pieces for the price. If you get my meaning. I decided on a bag of "Elite" brand chocolates which had written across the top "20% free" (in Hebrew, of course) and on the front of the package "26 pieces".

Now - I do not know what possessed me to count the number of pieces contained in the bag - I've never done it before - but you'd better believe that I'll do it again. For the bag contained only 25 pieces. Yes - I counted them several times - still 25 pieces.

Mind you - one piece less is not going to make or break me - but just imagine - if in each bag sold only one piece is missing - what kind of a profit can accrue to the company. They can make millions just on that "one piece".

So - good citizen that I am - I wrote to the Strauss Group Ltd. which is the parent company of "Elite". Just so that you know - Strauss is an enormous corporation doing business all over the world - according to the internet. They are involved with "Danone", "Unilever", "Pepsico", "Lavazza", "Frito-Lay" - to name only a few easily recognizable names out of many. In Israel they control dairy products, chocolates, coffees, snack foods, prepared salads - you name it, their finger is in it - so to speak.

I asked them for nothing - not for free chocolates - not for free "anythings" - not even for a refund for my missing piece of candy. I simply sent a letter to Ofra Strauss, Chairperson and Erez Vigodman, President and CEO of Strauss Group Ltd. telling them of the wrong count in the package.

And what did I expect in return? Just an answer - an apology if you like - for what was probably a mistake - after all - how many people actually count the pieces in a bag of chocolate? And what did I receive? Nothing. I have never had even an acknowledgement from them let alone an apology.

I can't even get on my high horse and threaten never to buy any of their products again - you can hardly turn around in Israel without running into their products. And how can I give up "Max Brenner" chocolates? So what will I do? Tell everyone I know about their short-count and about how they completely ignore letters from their consumers. And hope that, somehow, some day, this message gets to them - and if they ever reply I'll let you know.

Yalla, Bye.

THE AMERICANS HAVE GONE THE AMERICANS HAVE GONE....

2008-01-14T18:07:00.000+02:00

That was the week that was. Bush and his entourage were here and threw our city into an absolute mess. Now they're gone - BUT - he has promised to return to help us celebrate Israel's 60th Anniversary. Anything but that (the whip the whip - does anyone remember that old joke?)!!

Downtown was like a ghost town - so I heard. There was no way of getting from here to there. The people who had to get downtown to work managed - with great difficulty. Although a friend who works opposite the King David Hotel was turned back by the police. Restaurants were empty. Shops were empty. No one did any business. When I finally went downtown yesterday to get my hair done, my parking lot guy told me he simply closed the lot and went home - no cars.

So - what was the purpose of Bush's visit? He's certainly not running for re-election. But - he wants to go down in history as having done something - anything. So the two incompetents - the two failed leaders - met. And Bush told us to "keep Olmert - take care of him" - because he's a "good man". If that's not sticking his nose into Israeli politics - I don't know what it is. How dare he?

But there were some fun aspects to his visit. We couldn't get anywhere - so we didn't go anywhere. I did a lot of work at my desk. I did several laundries. I cooked - experimented with new recipes. Had an afternoon nap - almost unheard of. I went into the Moshava (the German Colony - in the other direction from downtown) and went to the post office and did some banking for the Va'ad (the building committee) and people were saying how nice and uncrowded the area was - there was lots of parking and space in all the cafes - because people couldn't get from there to here.

And I had time to begin a major translating job - translating pages and pages of menus for events to be held at the Regency Hotel - from Hebrew into English. Don't ask. I finally finished the job today....with the telephone assistance of Ros and Marallyn. (That's the nice thing about the three of us - we're always there to help each other.) So I managed to make them crazy too.

There are certain words that just aren't translatable - for instance kubbe hamusta - if you don't know what it is you can't know what it is. Well - kubbe in that case are dumplings filled with meat from the Kurdish cuisine - but hamusta - ain't no way. What about basar rosh - head meat - what's that? And what about a chef who has on his menu "tortillas" (Mexican, you will note) stuffed with meat Thailandi style? Or Thailandi beef stir-fried Szechuan-style? I can't wait to meet that chef.

And then there are pargiot. Pargiot are small chickens - like Cornish Hens - BUT - they are also boneless thighs from the pargit (singular of pargiot). And the chef doesn't make clear whether he is talking about pargiot or pargiot. See what I mean?

Enough already - now I'm getting hungry.

Yalla, Bye.

"THE AMERICANS ARE COMING THE AMERICANS ARE COMING"

2008-01-06T17:58:00.000+02:00

On very many levels I am extremely disturbed about President Bush's visit to Israel this coming Wednesday. Some of my concerns might seem, at first glance, to be merely selfish and self-serving. Such as my dismay at our city - Jerusalem - being thrown into chaos with regard to the traffic situation.

There will not be any way for us ordinary citizens to get downtown - for instance, I will not be able to get my hair done as my hairdresser is right in the middle of downtown. Sounds a bit petty - don't you think? But what about the people who work downtown and will find all kinds of impediments lying in their paths to their offices and shops? The City is not only closing off the main streets leading to the center of town - but has already forbidden parking on those streets and has said that cars will be towed to a parking lot in an outlying area.

Not to mention that traffic in this city is already a nightmare due to the light rail line being installed - which is already millions over budget and years late.

Visitors with confirmed reservations will be - no, have already been - thrown out of their hotels. And this at a time when tourism is just beginning to get back to where it was before the Second Lebanon War. Why is it necessary to reserve more than 800 - yes 800 - rooms for Bush's entourage? Who are all these people anyway? Are they integral to the "peace process"?

And why has the City spent millions of shekels on cleaning up the streets - but only the streets where Bush and his entourage will travel? What about the rest of the city? Under Mayor Lupolianski the city is falling apart - and yet millions of shekels are being wasted on this visit. Not to mention the thousands of flags being hung up along his routes - all costing money which, we are told, the country doesn't have for serious problems such as teachers' salaries. But we have the money for this shtuyot (stupidity)?

And I understand that the area around the Malha Mall will be closed so that President Bush can have his morning jog. Can't he go to a gym and walk on a treadmill like a normal person? It's three days - what will happen to him if he doesn't jog for three days? Better he should spend his time practicing the correct way to say nuclear - that's nyu-clee-ar Mr. Bush - not noo-cyoo-ler!

And why am I so angry about all of this? About the American President coming to Israel for a visit? Because he is a failed President with a failed presidency meeting with a failed Prime Minister. So - as all United States Presidents do when the going gets tough and their ratings are way down - they decide to be our savoir - to be "the one" to implement the "peace process".

And at what cost to us? Prime Minister Olmert is in no better political shape here at home than Bush is in the States. So these two failures - one who stole an election and one who wasn't even elected - are going to get together to decide our fate. Will that bring up their ratings? Will that make them more popular? Will that kill us?

Yalla, Bye.

HAPPY NEW YEAR

2007-12-24T11:05:00.000+02:00

No - no - it's not Rosh Hashana again. It's that other New Year. That's just one of the nice things about being Jewish - Jewish as I practice my religion - not Orthodox or Orthodox-Lite or Flexi-Dox - just culturally very Jewish - Conservative if you want a label - with some leftover religious observances left in from my childhood. That way you can actually celebrate two new years - Rosh Hashana and the other New Year. That's the one coming up on December 31st.

And as I've done for - well, I can't really remember how many years - I'll make the same two resolutions. The first is to stop smoking and the second is to go on a diet. The "stop smoking" one is easy - I've done it hundreds of times! I've done acupuncture, hypnosis, self-help books, peer pressure - you name it and I've done it. Maybe this year I'll succeed. Or - maybe not. What's making it easier - or a least making me smoke less - is the fact that smoking has been outlawed in so many places -- no smoking in restaurants, bars, cafes, the malls - and I never ever smoke in my car. So the more I drive the less I smoke. Nevermind that petrol is up to more than 6 shekels per litre - that's about $1.50 per litre or $6.00 per gallon - think of all the money I'm saving on cigarettes.

As for the dieting resolution - that's the toughie. After all - eating is socially acceptable - wherever you are. And Israelis eat all the time and in any place. It's not even as if I nosh all the time - because I don't. I'm not a nosher. I don't particularly like sweets - so no cakes and candies and ice cream. But - oh those parties and dinners out and dinners for friends at home.

Take last week for example. Joey decided to do a barbecue - yes, in the middle of the winter. Actually - we all ate in the dining room and someone did the barbecueing on the meerpesset (balcony). Steaks and mashed potatoes and roasted potatoes (he also lives in Ireland where you never serve less than two kinds of potatoes at a meal) and salads (a particularly delicious one courtesy of Mali), and home-made bread (courtesy of Miri) and gravy and parve ice-cream cake (courtesy of me) and wine. Dieting not possible.

And then there was Ros's surprise birthday party - lots of people and lots of good food. Her daughters Atanya and Yael went all out - what a spread. Quiches and rouladen and a pashteeda (like a quiche without the crust) and salads and cheeses and wine and cakes. Rude not to eat - no? And what did Marallyn and I give her for a present - you might well ask. A gift certificate to be our guest for dinner at one of my favorite steak places - more food.

And on Friday night Myra out-did herself with a sit-down dinner for twenty-one people. Starters consisted of avocado salad and kohlrabi & coconut salad (which we had in India at our friend Sheherazad's house and for which she emailed the recipe to us) and pate and onion jam (courtesy of me) and pickles and home-made wine-cured olives (courtesy of Aharon and Rivka) and seafood salad and an absolutely enormous challah (courtesy of Danny). And that was only the starters.

For the main course we had roast beef and stuffed turkey breast and a rice pilaf, and a casserole of white & sweet potatoes and green beans with almonds and two different green salads. Then she served homemade apple pie and poppy-seed cake and ice-cream cake and some kind of rich, dense chocolate truffle thing and cheese cake (courtesy of Orly) and assorted cookies (courtesy of Annette). And, as Arnon owns Yekev Anatot (Anatot Winery) - lots of good wine. Again - not a night for dieting.

And so my dear readers - I wish you all another good and healthy and happy New Year. Maybe not a slim one - but one filled with the joy of being with all your good friends and eating all that wonderful food - together.

Yalla, Bye.

THINGS I DON'T UNDERSTAND

2007-12-23T18:45:00.000+02:00

I'm going off to London for a few days at the end of January to my friend Stewart's 80th Birthday Party. I remembered that I had nikudot (points) on my El Al Europe account. So I asked my trusty Travel Agent, Ilana, to see how many points I had - enough for a free ticket? Yes. I needed 900 points - I had 944 - no problem. And - to make matters even better El Al is having a "special" until the end of the year - 650 points instead of 900 for a ticket to London. So that I have points left over toward another flight to Europe. Couldn't be better - no?

This morning Ilana called me. I have exactly the flights I want, seats on the aisle, the hotel I wanted - perfect. I have to pay "only" an additional $245 for the ticket. An additional $245 for the ticket? Yes. Why? For the fuel and airport taxes. Isn't that like going to a restaurant, ordering a meal and then being charged "additional" for the plates and cutlery? I don't understand.

Speaking of restaurants - I fail to understand why, when you order one quarter of a chicken you pay more for white meat than for dark meat. I mean one quarter is one quarter - is it not? Isn't one quarter 25% of a whole? Therefore, one quarter of a whole - whichever quarter it is - should be the same price as any other quarter - shouldn't it? I don't understand.

Still speaking of restaurants - I'll never understand Israelis. Nevermind that I've lived here just over 32 years and consider myself very Israeli - in some respects I guess. Most restaurants have what they call an eeskeet (a business lunch). It's a known fact that you can get the same food as in the evening - a whole meal in fact - for, very often, less than the normal price of the main course. And in most of the finest restaurants, too.

A week or so ago two friends and I decided to go out for lunch to "Buffalo Steak" - one of my favorite restaurants. When we got there at a little after 1:00 PM the place was empty. Absolutely empty. We sat down, the waitress gave us the menus - but there was no eeskeet menu. "May we have the eeskeet menu?" we asked. "Oh no - there is no eeskeet menu during the haggim (holidays)", she answered. True - it was Hanukkah - it was a hag - but the place was absolutely empty remember.

So - we very politely thanked her, said we would be back when they had the eeskeet menu for lunch and walked down the street to another of my favorite restaurants, "La Boca" - which was busy and jumping and was serving the business lunch. We had tacos, and fajitas, and kebabim, and entrecote, and potatoes and salad and tea with mint - for 69 shekels per person - about 17 American dollars. So - "La Boca" was doing a rip-roaring business serving their eeskeet and "Buffalo Steak" was empty. I still don't understand.

Yalla, Bye.

WHAT'S IN A NAME?

2007-12-15T09:55:00.000+02:00

As if my life weren't complicated enough already - we're now having a big kerfuffle in my family over what Hebrew name to use for my new grand-niece. Emails are flying fast and furiously across the Atlantic and we're all involved.

My brother - my two nieces - my nephew - my ex-sister-in-law - me - and it goes on. And just why is her Hebrew name so important? In our family it's the Hebrew name that's important. Babies are always named in memory of someone close who has died in order to carry the name on.

My niece and her husband, on the other hand, simply chose an English name they liked and we're now all busy sticking our noses into their business trying to come up with a Hebrew name.

When the baby was born they sent me an email telling me her name was Aidan/Aiden/Aidyn - they hadn't yet decided how to spell it! I voted for Aidan as I liked the way it looked. Aiden was my second choice and - as far as I was concerned - Aidyn looked like the name of a generic drug.

So her name is Aidan Rebecca. OK - Rebecca equals Rivka - which is in memory of my Mom - whose English name was Ruth and whose Hebrew name was Rivka - who would have been Aidan's great-grandmother. Also in memory of her other great-grandmother whose name was Regina - also beginning with an "R". Rivka covers two great-grandmothers - two "R's" with only one name needed...no one is left out.

But - although I don't know Regina's Hebrew name - I would bet it was Malka - Hebrew for Queen. Regina also means Queen. So that throws a spanner into the works - nowhere does an "M" fit into the equation. However, we'll go with the "R" for the sake of simplicity.

Be that as it may - Rivka takes care of her middle name. How about the first name? This morning I received an email from my niece asking for a Hebrew name for Aidan - which means "little fire" - in I don't know what language - Irish? Maybe. Little Fire in Hebrew translates into esh katan - I don't think so.

Here's my solution - which I sent on to my niece. Eden - which is pronounced just like Aidan - is a Hebrew word - as in Gan Eden - Garden of Eden. Just use Eden - sounds like Aidan - a Hebrew name by all means - and call her Eden Rivka in Hebrew. How's that for a solution? A name in memory of her two grandmothers plus a name my niece and her husband both like - done!!

And you thought life was simple?

Yalla,Bye.

B..B..B...BACON

2007-12-09T21:04:00.000+02:00

I'll tell you the truth. There are really times when I wish I didn't keep kosher at home. What brings that up? It's this way.

This evening I was watching IRON CHEF AMERICA on the Israeli Food Channel. Now - just because it's called the Israeli food channel it doesn't mean that all the programs are Israeli or in Hebrew or kosher - we also get programs from abroad and also Israeli programs that aren't kosher.

So anyway - there was I watching the food battle between Susur Lee of Toronto and Bobby Flay of New York. And what was the secret ingredient? Bacon. Four kinds. Irish bacon. American slab bacon. Italian pancetta - non-smoked bacon. And salt pork. With a little bit of caul fat thrown in for good measure. So what could be bad?

Just then the phone rang - and Marallyn was on the other end....she was watching the same show. (Did I tell you that we are addicted to the Food Channel?) "I'm drooling" she said. "I'm starving and I was just going to make myself a tuna sandwich". A tuna sandwich? How does that satisfy when the chefs are making ten different dishes with bacon? I could almost smell the bacon through the television.

And to make matters worse - one of the dishes was scallops and bacon - a simply divine combination and one that I always order in London at Manzi's. Wait - maybe the bacon and scallops were kosher. A good friend of Fred's was Harry Kemmelman - do you remember him? He wrote the Rabbi Books - "Friday the Rabbi Slept Late" was the most famous. Anyway - he once said to Fred that eating a ham and cheese sandwich was kosher - why? - because eating ham was a no-no and eating meat and cheese together was a no-no - soooooo - two negatives make a positive....thereby making a ham and cheese sandwich kosher. I wish.

So what did poor Marallyn have for dinner? I made a fabulous vegetable-turkey soup from one of the carcasses of my Thanksgiving turkeys and gave a care package to her - so she took it out of the freezer and that's what she had for dinner. Did it take the place of a BLT down with mayo or a grilled cheese and bacon? NO! But it sure beat a tuna sandwich.

And who won the Iron Chef competition? It was a tie. And I'll go to bed and dream of bacon. My house may be kosher - but my heart and my stomach sure aren't.

Yalla. Bye.

HANUKKAH - CHANUKA - CHANNUKA - HANNUK-----

2007-12-02T15:22:00.000+02:00

Doesn't matter how you spell it - it's almost here again. And early again - although sometimes it's late.

Wasn't it just a few months ago that I was railing about Rosh Hashana being very early this year? It stands to reason that if Rosh Hashana was early this year then Chanukkah will also be early - but it's still too early for me.

Have barely finished with Thanksgiving - well, I still have a turkey carcass in the freezer to make another soup but to all intents and purposes Thanksgiving is over and done with for this year. I'm simply not ready for Hanukah to arrive - and this week yet. I haven't polished my chanukia - although I did break down and buy the candles last week.

Truth to tell - there have been soufganiot (jelly donuts) in the shops for weeks now. For those of you who don't know - soufganiot are the symbolic food for Hanukkah here in Israel - unlike latkes - also known as levivot here (pancakes - particularly potato pancakes) in the States. Yes - people do eat latkes here - but soufganiot are the preferred food. Doesn't matter how many years I'll live here - jelly donuts are what we used to buy on the way to the office (in New York) to eat with our morning coffee - not something symbolizing Hannuka. I'm a latka girl....and I'll always be one.

On Wednesday Marallyn is doing her annual Channukka bash - and while she'll serve soufganiot - l know she's also serving latkes - now that's Channukkah - however you want to spell it.

Have a Happy One.

Yalla. Bye

THANKSGIVING DAY

2007-11-24T13:31:00.000+02:00

I used to have a friend (note the past tense) who, along with her new husband when she remarried, came to the conclusion that dinner parties - whether at home or in restaurants - had to be attended by an even number of people. Not just any even number - men and women, to be more specific. The seating had to be boy-girl-boy-girl-boy-girl etc etc etc. No gay couples - two men or two women don't constitute a "couple" - no boy-girl-boy-girl thing there. And, chas v'chalila (G-d forbid) - no single people. There has to be an even number around the table.

My Thanksgiving dinner broke all of her rules. There were thirteen of us around the table. Actually, my table only holds twelve comfortably - but with good friends --- we scrunched up a bit and all was fine. We were four married couples, one gay, two widows and two married women whose husbands couldn't attend.

Having broken all of the rules with my guest list - the dinner went on to be very traditional. Two turkeys as we can't get anything bigger than an eight kilo turkey here (about 17 pounds) and there has to be enough to go around generously plus leftovers for whoever wants to take home a "care package", chestnut stuffing, mashed potatoes, mashed sweet potato-glazed carrot-pumpkin souffle, corn pudding, green bean-cream of mushroom soup (parve of course)-and French's onion ring casserole, Brussels sprouts and smoked goose breast (in place of pancetta), gravy, cranberry sauce and cranberry relish.

We finished with apple pie, pecan pie and lemon meringue pie. All accompanied by wonderful red wine - Merlot and Notera - from my friend Arnon's yekev (winery) "Anatot".

Mind you, this did not go off without a hitch or two. My microwave packed in on Tuesday evening - how to warm everything up to get to the table hot? I called my trusty and reliable repair-man - a renaissance man if ever there was one - Graeme Stone - an Australian psychologist cum repair man cum contractor and soon-to-be tour guide - and he saved the day. It was just a blown fuse (did you know microwave ovens have fuses inside?) and he changed the fuse on the spot.

I heard on FoxNews in the morning the statistic that full-grown turkeys have approximately 3500 feathers. Luckily my friend Myra was coming over on Wednesday to cook with me - because each of those turkeys had at least that many feathers, if not more. For those lucky Americans who buy turkeys completely denuded - you don't know just how lucky you are. Here, the major feathers are removed but there are always hundreds of pin-feathers which have managed to escape and are thus left on the chicken or turkey - we simply think of them as extra protein! Myra and I spent two hours - each - on cleaning the turkeys. That's four man-hours just for the turkeys. Not to mention all the other peeling and chopping and cutting. But we did it - with time to spare.

One last almost faschla (mix-up) - which was averted at the last minute. One friend thought that Thanksgiving was next week - so she had dinner at home and when another guest called to ask her for a lift to my house she almost fainted. Good sport that she is - she quickly dressed, picked him up, came to the party, ate a second dinner - and only told us about it afterward.

So while my dinner party broke all of my ex-friends' rules - we had a marvelous time. As always - we ate, laughed, drank, told jokes and funny stories - and were all happy to be together for yet another Thanksgiving. I've been friends with most of the guests for at least thirty years - the "newest" friend for more than ten years. And that's something to be thankful for.

Yalla, Bye.

THANKSGIVING COUNTDOWN

2007-11-18T17:24:00.000+02:00

I've just gone back and read the three Blogs I wrote last Thanksgiving - actually If you, too, go back and read them there is no need for me to write this Thanksgiving.

But - I'll write anyway. There's no way you can shut this girl up. It's now Sunday evening and my preparations have already started. Four days until the big dinner. The turkeys are ordered and will be picked up on Wednesday. The vegetables for the stuffing are already sauteed and in the freezer - ditto the turkey stock for the gravy, also in the freezer. The breads for the stuffing are in the fridge getting a bit stale - as they should be - so I can toast them before making the stuffing.

Have already done most of the marketing except for the fresh vegetables. Have ironed the napkins and will iron the tablecloth on Wednesday just before I put it on the table - remember? - I hate cupboard folds in my cloths. (How neurotic can you be?)

Did you read THE GREAT CRANBERRY CAPER Blog? Well - another wonderful cranberry gift came my way on Thursday. I went to my friend Susan's house to pay a shiva call (the seven days you sit in mourning after someone close to you dies). I mean no disrespect when I say it wasn't a particularly sad occasion. Yes - it's always sad when you lose a parent - but - her Dad was 96-and-a-half when he died and he lived a very good and happy and useful life - and the people at the shiva spent the time celebrating his life instead of mourning his death - what a lucky man. Anyway - after everyone had gone and Susan and I were still sitting around and talking she said "Come into the kitchen". And she opened her freezer and gave me a bag of cranberries she'd brought back from New York!! And I hadn't even told her about my cranberry trials. She simply gave me a gift.

So now I have plenty of cranberries - on Tuesday I'll make fresh cranberry sauce and fresh cranberry relish - and I won't have to worry about saying FHB - remember that? - it means Family Hold Back - what your mother always said when there were too many unexpected guests and she wasn't sure there was enough food to go around. Of course you lost both ways - not only didn't you get enough to eat - you also didn't get any dessert because your mother then said "You didn't eat your dinner - now you don't get any dessert!".

And - the best thing of all - this year I don't have to get into a swivet about making pie shells. The company that makes phyllo dough and puff pastry just came out with rolls of pie dough - so this year it's three pies for sure - no sweat.

Yalla, Bye.

THE SHIRT OFF HER BACK

2007-11-17T10:21:00.000+02:00

You must have heard the expression "She'd give you the shirt off her back". My friend, Sheherazad, did just that - except it wasn't a shirt - it was a salwar kamize - those absolutely gorgeous Indian outfits consisting of loose pants, a long top and a scarf - all in different but coordinated fabrics and colors.

Two weeks ago I opened my computer to find an email that had been "lost" along the way telling me that Myra's and my friends, Sheherazad and her business partner Prashant, had to be in Jerusalem for an unexpected meeting and asking if we would be free on Saturday evening.

All well and good - but the message only arrived late Saturday afternoon and when I sent a message back to Prashant's Blackberry (don't you just love this new technology?) - they were already here. What to do? I was free - Myra was free - and I invited them to my house. After all, friends are friends and as they live in India and we live here we don't get to see each other very often. So any chance to get together is a chance not to be missed.

We had only a few hours between the time we spoke and the time they were due at my house. Achat, steym (literally one,two) Myra and I pulled things out of our freezers and fridges - she had cookies and rolls and salad stuff and I had salmon and tosfot (accompaniments) - and we all had a wonderful dinner and talked and talked until after midnight.

Sheherazad was wearing the most beautiful salwar kamize - she is stunning and wears the most elegant clothes - I remember when we all went to a wedding in Delhi and she said she was going to wear just a simple sari - and she turned up looking like something out of a fashion magazine - and so she turned up here in the most striking outfit - which I admired extravagantly. Peach colored pants, an olive green top and a scarf incorporating both those colors. Once again like something out of a fashion magazine.

Incidentally, I should tell you that Prashant's wife, Muna, is also a knockout. When I noticed her at the wedding I didn't realize she was Prashant's wife and I was going to ask her - a complete stranger at the time - if I could take her picture - she was wearing a drop-dead sari in marigold and deep wine - and I have the pictures to prove it.

The next day they were free and Myra (she is a tour guide) and I went with them on a tour of the Old City. And when we all met up at the Church of the Holy Sepulchre Sheherazad handed me a large bag - and inside was the salwar kamize!! What shall I say - I cried. She literally gave me the salwar kamize off her back. Did you ever hear of such a friend?

Yalla, Bye.

THE GREAT CRANBERRY CAPER

2007-11-13T14:08:00.000+02:00

It's almost Thanksgiving and I'm in the midst of preparing for my annual Thanksgiving Day bash - the annual pig-out (you should excuse the expression) of all the traditional foods (and some not so traditional) my Mom always made.

I've been planning for weeks - the guests are all invited - the turkeys are ordered - some of the marketing is done - but, wait - there are no fresh cranberries to be had in Israel. What to do.

So there I was having lunch with my dear friend _____ (all of the names have been omitted to protect the innocent) - who, incidentally is not coming this year as he has to be abroad - and I said "I have no fresh cranberries - I can't believe that I'm going to have to serve tinned cranberry sauce". A shonda (yiddish - a shame - a fate worse than death.) And _____ said, "I have a friend in the States who is coming here before Thanksgiving. I'll just ask _____ to bring some fresh cranberries for you."

After many emails back and forth - what kind do I want - what's the best way to transport them - will they still be edible after two weeks in transit (!) - my cranberries were on their way.

Their first stop was Frankfort - then on to Teheran - then on to Dubai - then on to Amman - and finally to Jerusalem - at long last. And they were in perfect shape. At each stop they were put into a refrigerator - with notes reminding _____ not to forget to take the cranberries.

And so it was that last week _____ invited me for a drink and to meet _____ who schlepped my care package halfway around the world.

And why am I protecting the innocent? Because I'm not absolutely sure that it's OK to import fresh cranberries into Israel - although I do it very often and also had _____ do it for me last year. You see, cranberries are only in the markets in the States just before Thanksgiving - where do they hide for the rest of the year? - and you can't always get them. So it falls to people who visit here around November to bring those precious berries. It's not as if I can go to New York in July and bring back cranberries and then put them in the freezer. Why should life be so simple?

Here's a thought - the cranberries have been to countries I've never visited - and will never be allowed to visit. How's that for irony? I wonder if Mr. Ahmadinejad knows he was sheltering cranberries for this nice Jewish girl?

Dear _____ and _____ - many thanks and my deepest appreciation. You will never fully understand just how happy you made me - and my guests.

I'll tell you all about my preparations and the big day as the week goes on - lots to do but I'll find time to write.

Yalla, Bye.

CATALONIA - CATALUNYA - part II

2007-11-09T12:56:00.000+02:00

Hola! That's how you are greeted in Catalonia - wherever you go. It has such a nice ring. Hola!

So let me tell you about the food there. It's much different from the rest of Spain - although I think of Catalonia as a different country - as, indeed, do the people from there. I recall eating much more meat, more vegetables as part of a meal and different kinds of soups, especially sopa de ajo (garlic soup) in the rest of Spain. The tapas (tiny one or two bite snacks) are also different. In Catalonia the tapas are more sandwich-y things - small pieces of crusty bread with spreads and that delicious Serrano ham and sausages. There wasn't a day at breakfast that I didn't have some of that ham and sausages.

Off the Rambla there is a market - "Mercat de La Boqueria" - which has stalls of the most gorgeous fruits and vegetables and meats and fish and spices. At the very back of the market is a restaurant - or rather a three-sided counter, where one perches on high stools, on the fourth side of which is a grill where the food is prepared. Only fish and shellfish, great bread for sopping up the sauces of olive oil, garlic (lots of garlic) and fresh parsley, Crema Catalan (the ubiquitous custard dessert) and beer, or wine or Cava - the Spanish sparkling wine. The restaurant is called the "Central Bar".

The menu is written on a chalkboard which hangs on the wall - and changes every day according to which fresh fish they have. As I didn't know what to order, I simply walked along the counter and looked at what people were eating and then chose. Three locals sitting next to us ordered a plate of the tiniest clams I have ever seen - each clam no larger than my thumbnail - simply done on the grill with the olive oil, garlic and parsley. The clams were piled high on the plate - and were absolutely delicious. A lot of work for a lot of clams - and absolutely worth it. We also ate fresh dorado and shrimp and razor clams - and drank Cava.

One night we ate patatas bravas - roasted or fried nuggets of potatoes with a spicy sauce, and the best grilled cuttlefish I have ever eaten....this time we drank sangria.

During the course of our stay we ate three kinds of paella - the usual seafood kind - one with black squid-ink tinting the rice and shellfish and a paella particular to Catalonia - fideua - made with tiny noodles instead of rice. When I came home I tried to replicate the paella using chicken instead of the shellfish - but it wasn't nearly as good. I think you really need the shellfish in the dish.

In Bilbao we ate in the Old Town at a famous old restaurant called "Victor Montes". We originally went there just to have some of their famous tapas and Cava - but the food was so good that when we saw them setting up for dinner we decided to stay on. The place was filled with locals - there was one table of fifteen celebrating something - and a number of smaller tables. We ate warm salt-cod salad, beans with foie gras and sweetbreads Catalan style - and, of course, Cava.

The next day in Bilbao we were exhausted from our five hours in the museum and decided to try the restaurant in our hotel - it wasn't part of the hotel, they just rented space there. The restaurant - "Zuria" - was absolutely first rate. It was decorated all in white - very striking - and the food was heavenly. We started with Zuria Croquettes - deep-fried little fish balls filled with salt-cod and cheese - ethereal. Then we went on to main courses of monkfish and cod - which we shared so we could taste more of everything - a cheese plate, bread pudding and coffee - and, of course, a crisp cold white wine.

I won't detail every meal - just more of pulpo (octopus), seafood, paella, great fish soup, salt cod, really good bread - one evening we stopped for oysters and Cava before going on to dinner - sangria, wine, surprisingly good coffee all over and imaginative tapas.

With all that good food available, just imagine how shocked I was to hear a couple near us asking someone for directions to the closest McDonalds!!! Can you believe it?

Yalla, Bye.

I APOLOGIZE

2007-11-03T11:08:00.000+02:00

Does anyone remember the song "I Apologize" sung by Billy Eckstein?

If I told a lie
If I made you cry
When I said goodbye
I'm sorry
From the bottom of my heart, Dear
I apologize

Does anyone even remember Billy Eckstein?

So - I apologize to you. I was just about to close down shop - I wrote and wrote and never received any comments from anyone. I thought that no one was reading me anymore and no one cared.

And then - yesterday - on my email I received lots and lots of "comments" - all dated weeks and weeks ago. I then "found" a whole page on which there are lot of other "comments" - all dated a long time ago - and which I cannot open. Have these "comments" been floating around in the ether all this time? Where have they been? They have certainly never reached my Blog or my email.

I apologize to all of you who have written for not replying to you. I didn't even know you were there and now that I do know I can't retrieve the messages. I click and click and nothing seems to happen. I think that my computer has a mind of its own.

My CM (computer mumche) seems to have disappeared for the nonce. I'll try him once more and then I'll try a new CM whom Yoav suggested I use. Maybe he - they - will come up with a solution for me.

In the meantime - if you want to get in touch with me about any of my BlogsI think you had better send your "comments" directly to my email for the time being ----- Rena.Isaacson@gmail.com

I'll keep on writing and you keep on commenting - and so it goes.

Yalla, Bye

CATALONIA - CATALUNYA.......

2007-10-31T11:13:00.000+02:00

.....whichever way you spell it - it's a wonderful place.

I just came back from spending almost two weeks in Catalonia -- Barcelona - Gerona - Montserrat - Figuera - Bilbao -- and can't wait to go back again.

Our headquarters were in Barcelona - except for two days in Bilbao where we went expressly to visit the Bilbao Guggenheim Museum. So now I've seen three Guggenheims - in New York, in Venice and now in Bilbao. A fabulous museum - with interesting (not "interesting" as in feech - but "interesting" as in really interesting) and exciting art and installations. Beautifully designed and laid out. We met a couple - Americans from California - in a restaurant the evening before we went to the museum. They said the museum was a bore and they managed to spend two hours there - and that was stretching it. What were they looking at? Were they even at the same museum? We left the museum after more than five hours - and that only because we were exhausted. Five hours is a long time in a museum - try it sometime.

Our hotel was perfectly located - ten minutes walk along the river to the museum and about fifteen minutes the other way to the Old Town. There's also a Calatrava Bridge in Bilbao - much smaller than the one being erected in Jerusalem. It is certainly much too modern for the city - but - somehow - it fits. Go figure.

Barcelona is a gorgeous city - clean and well laid out and with nice, nice people. Early each morning I stood on my little balcony and watched the city come awake. And every morning there was the white street-cleaning truck washing the streets. And people making deliveries - and other people standing on their little balconies greeting the morning. We were right off the Rambla - a busy main drag - but far enough away to miss all the noise. Something I didn't understand - day and night there were people walking through the streets shlepping suitcases - from where to where?

If you like Gaudi - this is the place for you. He designed such glorious buildings - Casa Batllo - La Pedrera - Park Guell - the Sagrada Familia Church - among others. What a fertile imagination he had. All so distinctive - and so "Gaudi". Of course - if you don't like his kind of work - this is not the place for you!!

I won't tell you about everything we saw - you'll have to go there yourself or read a guidbook - but I'll give you some of my impressions. All signs are written in at least two languages - depending on where you are - Spanish always and either Catalonian or Basque - and very often also in English - a very friendly place for tourists. I can understand and speak a very little bit of Spanish - nevermind that I ordered "helado" (ice-cream) instead of "hielo" (ice) for my Coke - the waitress understood me and very politely corrected me (politely being the operative word). Some words with the Ls are split - for instance the street named "Paral-lel" - so that one knows to pronounce the word as in parallel - not parayel. Speaking of which - I was always confused - had we been on "Paral-lel" or "Diagonal" or "Circular"? Those are all names of streets.

And the underground system - I rode it every day - and that's saying something. I've managed to avoid riding the subway in New York for at least thirty years - ditto the underground in London. (I did, however, use the underground in Prague and Berlin.) But Barcelona is something else. There are about seven lines - all well marked - all clean - and all the platforms with clocks telling you when the next train will arrive - and it arrives. All you have to do is look at a map - see where you want to go - get on the right train - and a light-up map over the train car door lights up to tell you what the next stop will be. For someone (me) who gets lost driving around the block that is a great system.

Saw almost everything that the guidebooks said to see - whatever I missed will have to wait for next time - and there will be a next time.

As for the food - that will be my next blog.

Yalla, Bye.

MORE THIS 'N' THAT

2007-10-05T12:23:00.000+02:00

My televisions haven't been working properly. One died - nothing to do about that - it was the first color TV we bought about thirty years ago - served us well and has now gone to its eternal rest. But the others have been cutting out in the middle of the programs - all of a sudden two new TVs are dying too? Whom should I call - my service provider "YES" - or the TV repairman?

Neither, as it turns out. There is some kind of ship out in the Mediterranean whose signals are interfering with our cable company. Did you ever hear of such a thing? To make it up to us "YES" is giving us - for the next two weeks - free first-run movies. Whooppee! But it doesn't do me any good as I am going abroad for the next two weeks.

"THE HOLIDAYS" are finally over - whew! Absolutely nothing gets done here - it's always "leefnay ha chag" (before the holiday) or "acharay ha chag" (after the holiday). The post office virtually closes down operations, my money changer went on vacation (I need to get some euros), my hairdresser went away, almost all offices are on half-day schedules, my hairdresser went away, and it is impossible to drive in Jerusalem. And my hairdresser went away!!

The religious come from all over the world to spend "The Holidays" in Jerusalem. People who don't drive all year long are renting cars for the holiday period. Then we have "marches" - The March to Jerusalem, The Blessings of the Cohanim (Priests - jewish ones of course), the cars whose drivers can't see where they are going because the schach (the fronds used to cover the succot (temporary dwellings) is falling down over the windshields - and on and on and on.

Last week Ros (with an s) came back from her trip abroad. As she has lived here even longer than I have, I asked her what restaurants she remembered from our early days here. ( Remember the last blog I wrote?) So as we were having dinner in the Black Steer - which she remembered used to be the Pundak Motza back in the days when - she remembered a whole lot of other restaurants to add to my list - Beni Dagim, HaShipudia, Shipudei HaGefen, Rama, The Georgian which then became the Marrakesh, Mama Mia, La Fontana, Ha Tzrif, Savion, an Indian Restaurant whose name no one seems to remember on Rehov Yannai - but everyone remembers was there - and whose owner was called Flower Sillamon, a Chinese Restaurant at the top of the windmill next to the Kings Hotel, and Kerem.

By the way, in my last blog I gave the transliteration for a dish called "Jerusalem Mixed Grill" as meiourav. Myra - my expert on Hebrew pronounciation - says it should have been meyorav. I stand corrected.

And now I'll say goodbye for the next two weeks. Roz (with a z) and I are going off to Barcelona and Bilbao for a holiday. That's what I needed the euros for and why I can't take advantage of the "YES" offer of free films. Our trip sounds really exciting - we've planned all kinds of fun things to do and interesting side trips to make. Will let you know all about it when I get back. Have also heard that the food is wonderful - all kinds of beautiful fish and shellfish.

Yalla, Bye.

"RASHOMON"

2007-09-29T20:07:00.000+02:00

This past week - just before Succot - there was a special issue in one of our newspapers in honor of the holiday. One of the articles talked about a new cookbook which takes the readers on a "fabulous culinary and cultural journey to the land of milk and honey".

The author of the article states that before the late 80s one would be hard-pressed to find a wealth of restaurants in Israel - or, indeed, any place other than some hummus restaurant in the Old City or an Israeli breakfast at some mediocre hotel. He writes "Up until the late 1980s, if you were on a visit to Israel searching for a hearty meal, you had to stay at the house of relatives or a good friend whose mother happened to be an outstanding cook".

And here is where the "Rashomon" comes in. Remember the film "Rashomon" - a film wherein an event is witnessed by several people - who each, afterward, have a different interpretation of that event?

I came to live in Jerusalem in the fall of 1975. My husband and I were inveterate restaurant-goers and ate in all manner of restaurants - simple hummus places, late-night bars and cafes where we went to eat a bowl of onion soup when most restaurants were closed, fancy and elegant places for special occasions - and when all else failed we went to the shuk where we stood in the middle of the street and ate meiurav - that wonderful grilled and spicy mixture of innards and onions placed in a pita with a pickle on top.

So it was with no small sense of amazament that I read his statement. In no time at all I came up with a list of thirty-some-odd restaurants. And after speaking with my two other restaurant-knowledgeable friends - Myra and Marallyn - the list grew to more than forty - and I'm sure I've left some out.

They're in no special order. For those of you from Jerusalem - or those of you who visited Israel before 1990 - I'm sure you'll recognize at least some on this list.

Leah's Restaurant Rehavia (where I went on my first date with my soon-to-be-husband), Chez Simon, Alla Gondola, Entrecote, Fink's (the best goulash soup ever), Fefferberg's, Four Seasons, Mandarin, Michael Cohen's (arguably the very best memoulaim - stuffed things - I have ever eaten), Mishkenot Sha'ananim (the place to go for that very special occasion) , Caravan in Abu Gosh, Goulash Inn, Lotus, Sea Dolphin, Golden Chicken, City Restaurant, Philadelphia, La Pasta, Venezia, Katy's, Rotisserie at Notre Dame, the Chinese restaurants in the gas stations at Ramat Denya and Kyriat Yovel, the Duck restaurant in the gas station near Nofim (we were big on reataurants in gas stations in those days), Heppner's, Steakiat Hatzot (where we ate meiurav), Off the Square, Cheesecake, Norman's, Ocean, Gilly's, Inn at Ein Karem, Select, Au Sahara, Shemesh, Cafe Atara (onion soup at night), Abu Seif (the second-best memoulaim), Eddie's, Hamsa Grill at the old Hilton, Phoenix and Da La Thien.

And in Tel Aviv - where we didn't go too often because it was a hegira to get there in those days before the highway - Yunis,Touton, Alhambra and Versailles (good food but probaly the most pretentious restaurant ever with gold frames around the wall air-conditioners!!).

Most of those restaurants don't exist today - but they were in business for many years. I would venture to say that thirty-two years on most restaurants in other cities in the world don't exist either. Of course, there are always exceptions - and there are restaurants that go on and on - just as there are here.

True - restaurants are different today. Israelis - as people from other countries - are better travelled. Today there are all manner of foodstuffs available that we could only dream about then - if we even knew they existed. Our palates are more sophisticated.

BUT - there were definitely restaurants in Israel before the 90s - and very good ones, too. Whatever can he have been thinking? This is really a "Rashomon" moment.

If you remember any restaurants that I've left out - let me know.

Yalla, Bye

SHALOM, YEDID

2007-09-23T10:44:00.000+02:00

When Yitzhak Rabin was murdered, then-President Clinton, all the bumber stickers and the CD issued in his memory said "Shalom, Chaver" - which means "Goodbye, Friend".

However, in the vernacular "chaver" is what you call your boyfriend and "yedid" is what you call a dear male friend - not a boyfriend.

So - as a bow toward my late friend, Robert - who was a great fan of Yitzhak Rabin - I am calling this SHALOM, YEDID.

Robert was a will-o-the wisp who came into my life some ten years ago or so - lit my life up for most of that time - and then took his own life just before Rosh HaShana. And it's taken me until now just to be able to write about him - it - the terrible tragedy that befell all of us - and him.

Robert was a tortured soul - brilliant - witty - a great cook - funny - ambivalent about his sexuality - sharp - vicious upon occasion - well travelled - well read - a good writer - a great friend - an implacable enemy - a charming host when the spirit moved him - an autocratic host when that particular spirit moved him - sometimes manic - sometimes depressed - sometimes embracing life - sometimes suicidal - in short - just Robert.

He had an enormous circle of friends whom he brought together at his various soirees - small dinner parties - large dinner parties - anything having to do with food. His friends ranged from Jews to Christians to Arabs to intellectuals to business people to professionals to people in government - actually, anyone who had something to say for themselves. That seemed to be his only criterion. He embraced us all - and he pushed us all away.

And when I received the phone call telling me of his death - well, what words are sufficient to describe my emotions? Disbelief? Shock? More disbelief? And great, great sadness.

For Robert and me our main connection was food - shopping together at the shuk - having a moveable feast, which meant going from place to place and having only one course at each place - talking about food - cooking together - comparing recipes - exchanging recipes - but also going to films - and discussing books - and fighting about politics - and planning parties - and listening to music - and spending countless hours on the phone (he loved to talk on the phone). He thought nothing of calling me - sometimes at most inappropriate moments - and saying "You must come over right now to taste my new recipe". Or calling to say "I've just been to the Old City and have bought the most fabulous hummus for you which I'm bringing over right now".

So that when it came time to say good-bye, about forty of his friends - by no means the sum total of all his friends but only those whom we could contact - came together to send him to his final rest. He had no family in Israel. He had no parents, his favorite nephew lives in New Zealand, and his sister in England had just undergone surgery and couldn't make the trip. And even though he had a love-hate relationship with all of us - we never stopped loving him and caring about him. In fact, at the cemetary I couldn't help wondering if he knew just how many friends he had and how much we all loved him - and how much we will all miss him.

And on a beautiful, hot, sunny day we buried him - and prayed that he has finally found the peace and tranquility he so longed for.

Shalom, Yedid.

Yalla, Bye

"BE PREPARED"

2007-09-12T06:53:00.000+03:00

I'm prepared. Are you prepared? For Rosh HaShana, that is.

Although this evening is the first night of Rosh HaShana - I'm still not ready emotionally for it. I'm prepared - but not ready, if you get my meaning. It's still hot, we're still in summer mode, it's not yet time to break out the fall and winter clothes - but Rosh HaShana will arrive in Jerusalem at 6:14PM - ready or not - here it comes.

My new article appeared in the WEEKEND edition of the Jerusalem Post this morning and I titled it "Be Prepared" - in honor of the song of the same name by Tom Lehrer. Do you remember Tom Lehrer? He was a teacher - professor? - at either Harvard or MIT or Dartmouth - how's that for being exact? - many years ago - but he's really famous (well, among a certain group of people of a certain age) for those wonderful, satirical songs we used to sing.

For those who don't remember the lyrics - or who want to know the lyrics to "Be Prepared"- here they are.

Be prepared! That's the Boy Scouts' marching song,
Be prepared! As through life you march along.
Be prepared to hold your liquor pretty well.
Don't write naughty words on walls if you can't spell.

Be prepared! To hide that pack of cigarettes,
Don't make book if you cannot cover bets.
Keep those reefers hidden where you're sure that they cannot be found,
And be careful not to smoke them when the scoutmaster's around,
For he only will insist that they be shared.
Be prepared!

Be prepared! That's the Boy Scout's solemn creed,
Be prepared! And be clean in word and deed.
Don't solicit for your sister, thats not nice.
Unless you get a good percentage of her price.

Be prepared! And be careful not to do
Your good deeds when there's no one watching you.
If you're looking for adventure of a new and different kind,
And you come across a Girl Scout who is similarly inclined,
Don't be nervous, don't be flustered, don't be scared.
Be prepared!

And with that I wish you - one and all - a Happy and Healthy and Peaceful New Year.

Yalla, Bye.

WE'VE COME A LONG WAY, BABY

2007-09-05T18:48:00.000+03:00

Once upon a time in Israel - especially in Jerusalem - you could count the really good restaurants on the fingers of your hands - and still have some fingers left over.

There was "A La Gondola" on King George; "Chez Simon" on Rehov Shamai and "Mishkenot Sha'ananim" in Yemin Moshe. And that was that. All are gone now.

If you wanted to make the trek into Tel Aviv - and it really was a trek lasting some two hours, more or less, each way - through Latrun on a two-lane road and then via Ramle, and driving through orchards if there happened to be an accident along the way and you needed to get past the traffic tie-up - you could find a few more "good" restaurants - the very pretentions "Versailles" which I think was on Allenby, "Toutoun" in Old Jaffa and "Alhambra" on Jerusalem Boulevard also in Jaffa.

We've really come a long way, baby. In Tel Aviv - to be sure - there are a plethora of seriously fabulous restaurants - restaurants that really make my mouth happy. But it's Jerusalem that's the big surprise. We have "Arcadia' and "Cavalier", which can stand up proudly against any restaurant in the world - non-Kosher - and we also have wonderful Kosher restaurants that I voluntarily go to - "Canela", and "Gabriel" and "Tzachko" - for instance. I say voluntarily because although my kitchen is Kosher, my stomach isn't - but these places are absolutely worth eating in - Kosher or non-Kosher.

Today, my great and good friend Yoav - who is a "feinschmecker" by anyone's standards and knows and loves fine food and wine although he can't cook worth a damn - took me out to lunch - as he often does. He is such a gentlemen that he gave me my choice of restaurants - among which was a fairly new place called "Colony". I've been hearing only wonderful things about the restaurant - but, someow, never managed to get there - until today.

What I've been missing. The restaurant is in an absolutely non-descript area which is fast becoming one of the "in" places for fine food and entertainment. There is "Colony", "Pini Etzel Hatzer", which opened two weeks ago after being a Jerualem fixture in the center of town for years, then moving to Tel Aviv and then back here, "Schmiel", a dairy restaurant whose marvelous youghurt soup I copied when I got home, and the "Ma'abada" - where I saw Shalom Hanoch and Ninette perform recently.

The restaurant - which bills itself as "Salon - Bar - Restaurant" - is imaginatively decorated - and has seating both outside and inside. There is a long bar, lounge seating on some of the most beautiful and interesting chairs I've ever seen, a dining terrace, a lounging terrace, and seating on three levels inside. As it was very hot today we chose to sit inside - as did all the patrons.

And now to the best part - the food. There is an imaginative menu - with only a few of the items not terribly original I must say - but all beautifully presented. And judging from the completely empty plates that went back to the kitchen - all the food was superb. Yoav began with a gazpacho, served in a gorgeous bowl - which looked beautiful, and which he said was delicious - and I began with a whole hatzil baladi - a small roasted eggplant - which was obviously burned on an open fire as it should have been, so that it had that distinctive smokey taste - served in a bowl on a bed of creamy tehina and harissa - a somewhat spicy relish which was the perfect foil for the mild eggplant and tehina. My mouth was singing. As was Yoav's - since he tasted - and tasted - my eggplant.

While we usually try to order different main courses when we dine together - today we were both in the mood for the special - two fillets of bouri - which is close in taste to American striped bass - served on a bed of perfectly spiced and seasoned quinoa - and which had flakes of sea salt, not just as a seasoning but as an integral part of the dish. My mouth continued singing.

Of course, we drank a bottle of Gamla Chardonnay - perfect and light to suit the day and the food. It's easy to finish a whole bottle of wine when the conversation and food are good - and lunch goes on for several hours. There was an individual loaf of good dense bread on each table - and we finished with intense dark expressos, as we are not dessert eaters but like espresso after a meal.

Naturally, we looked at the other tables to see what people had ordered. We were sitting on a raised level and it was easy to see what was going on. Most tables ordered the hatzil baladi as one of their starters, the pastas were original and a lot of people ordered that, and several people were eating entrecote steak with potato puree - whose aroma was intoxicating. The table next to us had some kind of dessert which looked divine - I'm not sure what it was as I didn't even glance at the dessert menu but I will next time.

I loved the many different shapes of plates they used - each shape perfectly complementing the food being served. And did I mention the service? Warm and gracious and competent without being overbearing or intrusive.

I don't know what lunch cost as I was a guest - but judging from the menu prices and the wine list - which is relatively small but well thought out - I would imagine that lunch cost approximately 200 shekels per person - which, when you think about it, comes to about 50 dollars American - much less than it would cost for a comparable meal in New York.

Even their business card is classy - and I'm putting it into my card file immediately - I can't wait to go back again. Too bad I'm busy tomorrow. I'm doing a food-tasting to choose the menu for a wedding!

Yalla, Bye.

.

"AL REGEL AHAT"

2007-08-29T11:42:00.000+03:00

"Al regel ahat" means on one foot - which means I'll tell you, quickly and "b'kitzur" (in short) what's been going on and why I haven't had time to write.

First of all - it just occurs to me that I have been writing this blog for a little over one year. Actually, it's more than that, since I started writing this as letters to friends during the 2nd Lebanon War - and the letters, somehow, morphed into this blog.

So - more than a year of telling you what I've been doing - how life is in Israel - where I've travelled - the dinner parties I've given - other people's parties I've cooked for. I've railed at our politicians - been furious with our government - v'choolay, v'choolay, v'choolay (etc.etc. etc.).

It's been a long hot summer - unremitting heat for weeks and weeks. Which means one doesn't want to do anything - even though my flat is air conditioned. I shudder to think about my electricity bill - which must look like the national debt by now.

Getting ready to cook once again - it's THE HOLIDAYS of course. Still not ready for them - but there's no choice. Going to Ouri and Devora for the first night and then to my cousins - Dizza and Pazzi - for lunch the next day. I really wanted to go to "Beit Knesset" (shul, synagogue) but that's hard to do when you are more than 100 kilometers from home. And there will probably be the usual Second-Day-Rosh-HaShana party in Jerusalem - for which the guests have to provide the food - so - more cooking.

Have been doing the usual - guests for dinner - going out with my friends - working on the Va'ad!! - writing. Which reminds me - we have the Annual Va'ad General Meeting next Tuesday evening - that should be a lot of laughs. It's probably the thing I hate most during the year - except maybe for going to the dentist or the gynecologist. That should tell you how awful the meetings are. Actually - the Va'ad takes up a lot of my time - a thankless job for which I am not paid but rather blamed for everything that goes wrong in the building. Why do I do it? Because no one else wants to - and as I have to live here I might as well have the building run the way I want it to.

Had a terrible toothache - which turned out to be nothing - except it hurt - and as soon as I finish writing this I'm going to the dentist for a checkup. And after that a trip to the opthalmologist to take care of this terrible eye infection I've developed. Not such fun things.

Also have a deadline to meet for the next article I'm doing for The Jerusalem Post. Catch up with you later.

Yalla, Bye.

IS IT ROSH HASHANA ALREADY?

2007-08-16T17:48:00.000+03:00

Those of us/you who celebrate holidays "not of the Jewish persuasion" don't have it so bad. Don't have it so bad? We/you have it very good.

Christmas? Always - always - always - December 24th & 25th. New Year's - always December 31st and January 1st. Each year it rermains the same. July 4th? On July 4th. Halloween? Always the same date. Thanksgiving - the third Thursday in November - and you can bet your life on it. True - in the States George Washington and Abraham Lincoln have kindly consented to move their birthdays to a Monday to give Americans two long weekends - but it's always around the same time each year.

Jewish Holidays? They're a crapshoot. They're either "very early" or "very late". Jewish Holidays are never - ever - "on time". Take this year, for example. Rosh Hashana is much too early. How can Rosh Hashana be September 12th? I'm not ready for it. It's still the middle of the summer. Last year Rosh Hashana was at the very end of September and Yom Kippur fell in October - that makes sense.

And the Religious insist on changing Summer Time back to Winter Time for the Holidays. Don't ask me why. (Something about the hours of fasting on Yom Kippur. Correct me if I'm wrong - but aren't twenty-four hours twenty-four hours whenever they begin?) So that at the beginning of September already it will be getting dark earlier.

And, talk about bad planning. Yom Kippur falls this year on Friday night and Saturday - we don't work on those days anyway....so we're cheated out of two "free" days. What kind of "mishegas" (craziness) is this? And Rosh HaShana falls on Wednesday night - so Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday are Holidays.

I remember that when I was a kid growing up in New York Jewish women - no matter how early the Holiday and no matter how hot it was - wore their "Hadassah Tallis" (otherwise known as a mink stole) to shul. So what if the temperature was 90 degrees farenheit - they had to show the world that their husbands could afford to buy them a mink stole. By the way - I wonder what ever happened to all those mink stoles - I haven't seen one in years.

No matter - I'm going to begin to get myself mentally ready for Rosh HaShana - even though I'm not really ready for it.

Yalla, Bye.

NU, NU, NINETTE

2007-08-03T01:20:00.000+03:00

I'm easy. I'm flexible. I'm also a very good friend. So it was that when Marallyn said to me that she wanted to go to the Ninette Tayeb concert at The Ma'abada (The Lab) this evening and would I go with her I said "Sure!" - nevermind that Ninette was only a name that I had seen in the gossip columns.

May I tell you that Marallyn and I brought the up the average age of the audience by - well, I won't tell you by how much - but suffice it to say that most of the audience was in their teens and early twenties. There were actually a few "more mature" people there - but a very few.

Ninette is the hottest young singer around today. She was a big winner on the "Kohav Nolad" (A Star is Born) show - so Marallyn told me. She was a big star on an Israeli "telenovela" - pronounced TEL-a-noh-VEL-a (soap opera) - but as I never watch telenovelas - American or English or Israeli - I didn't know her from that either. Actually I lie. I once watched several episodes of an Israeli telenovela - something about a family who owned a vineyard - for Marallyn - who had to be abroad for a few weeks and needed to know what went on during the time she was gone. As I said - I'm a very good friend so I watched it and reported to her.

But I digress. So there we were at the show. What can I tell you? To quote Marallyn: "I've now seen Ninette three times. The first time - this time - and the last time". True - Ninette has a very good voice. And very loud. In fact, the whole concert was very loud. VERY LOUD. VERY VERY LOUD. With a lot of lights flashing on and off. I kept hoping that no one in the audience was prone to epilepsy - those flashing lights could have set anyone off. And Marallyn was hoping that no one had a pacemaker - the bunga-bunga-boom-boom of the backup band could have caused cardiac arrest.

I'm the person who thinks Shalom Hanoch and Yehuda Poliker and "Teapacks" (or "Tipex" - take your choice of spelling - this being Israel) - are the greatest to listen to.

I'm going to sleep now - just as soon as my ears stop ringing.

Yalla, Bye.

WE'RE HAVIN' A HEAT WAVE...and other excuses

2007-08-01T19:50:00.000+03:00

It occurred to me today that I haven't written in weeks. And why did I think of it? Because in the midst of this impossibly long-lasting heat wave all the electricity in town went out. And after I realized that it wasn't because of anything I did wrong (I'm Jewish - it's always my fault) - I realized that I hadn't written and if my computer went down it would be ages before I wrote again.

And was I lucky. Although my computer was on at the time it wasn't damaged - and I didn't even get that rude notice on my screen telling me to turn the computer off properly next time!!! And the air-conditioner wasn't damaged - even better luck.

So - here I am - feeling guilty for not writing - and telling you why. Excuses, excuses - I know - but the dog ate my homework, Teach.

In looking back over my "yoman" (diary) I see that I have been running and running for the past month. First there was the Film Festival - but it wasn't just a matter of going to see some films. Nothing easy like that. There were several of us involved in this "production", so first three of us had to meet - for dinner, of course - to decide just what we wanted to see. Out of some one-hundred fifty or two-hundred films we had to come up with a workable number - all to fit into the time-span of one week. In different permutations and combinations of who was going to see what and with whom we came up with about twenty films - twelve for me. And then we had to draw up some kind of a spread-sheet so we could see what fit where - don't ask. And then we had to go and buy the tickets. I couldn't manage more than two in one day although Shosh saw three in one day. So that took care of more than a week.

Then there was a major marketing - and cooking and baking and preparing for a dinner party I gave that just seemed to grow and grow. I was just going to do a small dinner for Yoav and Ernesto - who were here on one of their flying visits - and two other friends. However - as I believe that it 's just as easy to cook for ten as for six - there we were. Great fun - great food (my Mother always said I shouldn't break my elbow patting myself on the back - but the food really was good) - fabulous friends - lots of good conversation and laughter - and there went some more time.

Then a wedding - out of the city, of course. And dinner and a show - "Shalom Hanoch". And Friday brunches with Marallyn. And lunch with Roz. And lunch with Marallyn and Evelyn and Bubbie Chana (Marallyn's Mom) to celebrate Bubbie Chana's 84th birthday. And another show - "Momix" with Roz. And dinner with my nephew and his wife and kids (who were visiting from Canada) and his mother-in-law who lives here. And dinner in Tel Aviv with Roz and daughters and friend. And then - as if I hadn't seen enough films - we went to see an adorable, fun film - "Ratatouille". And a party at Myra and Arnon's house.

Oh - I almost forgot - I had a terrible toothache and have been to the dentist twice - going again tomorrow. And in-between all the usual everyday things that have to get done - the "ozeret" (house cleaner - the word literally means female helper - we don't say maid) - the laundry - taking care of building business -- don't forget that I'm head of the building committee - and that's why I haven't written lately.

Another excuse? This heat has been so fierce that when I get home I just want to take off my clothes - put on my air-conditioner - and collapse.

Yalla, Bye.

SHALOM HANOCH IS A NATIONAL TREASURE

2007-07-22T14:23:00.000+03:00

When I came here in 1975 I had no Hebrew at all. Well - technically that's not absolutely true. I could say "eema" (mother) and "abba" (father). "Ken" (yes) and "lo" (no). And I knew three sentences - which I had learned at the Ulpan at the Jewish Agency Building in New York. "Yesh po shemesh? Ken, yesh po shemesh rak ba boker." (Is there sun? Yes, there is sun only in the morning.) A sentence I have had one or two occasions to use - and a sentence I have never had occasion to use - never ever - "Ha gvina ha levana al ha shulchan ha katan". (The white cheese is on the small table.) That's sort of like the first sentence everyone learns in French "La plume de ma tante est sur la bureau de mon oncle" (My aunt's pen is on my uncle's desk.) - another of those sentences which no one ever uses.

I also had no idea who the popular music stars of the day were - except for Yoram Gaon, Yaffa Yarkoni and Shoshana Damari...whose music had made it to New York.

So that when I arrived here and began to listen to the radio and heard the popular songs and popular singers I became very excited with the music. And the first three records I bought -- 12 inch 33 1/3 LPs - no tapes or CDs then -- were by "Poogy", "Chocolat, Menta, Mastik" and Shalom Hanoch. "Poogy" and "Chocolat, Menta, Mastic" disbanded long ago - Shalom Hanoch is still going strong.

As I said, I had no Hebrew and so couldn't understand the words - and, therefore, had no idea what a fabulous songwriter Shalom Hanoch was/is - but his music really turned me on.

And so it was that last Thursday night Marallyn and Shosh and I went to a "live" Shalom Hanoch concert. The man has never been out of fashion - that's 32 years - and he was singing even before I got here.

There's a relatively new club across the road from my house called "Hamabada" (The Laboratory) which is a small and intimate venue and which I visited for the first time during the Film Festival a week or so ago.

It's a sort of theatre-in-the-"U" - not quite a theatre-in-the-round - and we were sitting along one side of the "U" so that we had a great view of the stage and also of the audience. What can I tell you - Shalom Hanoch and his accompanist, Moshe Levi - who is so much more than that, a really fabulously talented musician in his own right - sang and played for two hours without a break. And Israeli audiences being what we are - we sang along with him. And clapped in time to the music. And waved - well, at one time the audiences waved cigarette lighters and candles - but as that's not allowed anymore we waved lighted cell phones! Keeping up with the times, I guess. And no, we weren't being rude or disruptive - we were encouraged to participate.

There were two young boys - they couldn't have been more than about 16 years of age - sitting in the front row facing the stage - and they knew every single word of every single song - along with the appropriate hand gestures. The audience represented three generations!! Can you imagine such an evening? When I looked out over the audience I noticed that there was no one just sitting still - each and every one of us was moving in time to the music. I'm still on a high. He promised to come back to Jerusalem and sing for us again - I'll be first on line to buy tickets.

In the meantime, Marallyn and I are going to see Ninette next week - can anything measure up to Shalom?

Yalla, Bye.

LOGICAL?

2007-07-07T18:46:00.000+03:00

My friend, Shosh, says that when the Greeks left they took all the logic with them - and there has not been any logic in Israel since.

I think she's right.

For instance - we are in the middle of our 24th Annual Jerusalem Film Festival (more about that another time) - and this morning - at 9 o'clock - we went to Beit Shmuel to see our first film of the day. The film, of course, didn't start until 10 o'clock - but as there is a lack of parking spaces and we had to dash out of the theatre to get to another theatre to see our second film of the day we needed a spot right near the front entrance...hence the early arrival.

The film ended - we said goodbye to our other friends - ran to the car - and started to drive to the second theatre. As we got to the main street - where we had to turn left - there was a big sign with a big arrow pointing to the right. "OK "- I said to myself - "I'll turn right and go around the block". But - it wasn't necessary - because despite the big arrow pointing right - the road split and there was another even bigger arrow painted in the street pointing to the left. Logical?

Which reminded me of the time a few weeks ago when Myra and I went to the Mall. There were big sales going on and the shops set up tables in the middle of the aisles to hold their sale goods.

One of the tables had a sign which said - T-SHIRTS-2 for 50 SHEKELS. The original price marked on each T-shirt was 30 shekels. Myra only wanted one shirt and said she would pay the 30 shekels for the one shirt instead of 25 shekels (2 for 50 - remember?). "Oh no" said the salesgirl - "I can't sell you only one". "Why not?" asked Myra innocently. "The computer won't let me", she answered. THE COMPUTER WON'T LET HER? Doesn't she know that people program computers? Computers don't decide for themselves. Logical?

But with all this mishegass (craziness) in our country - things happen which defy all logic....in a very nice way. When we got to the second theatre - the Lev Smadar - we had just enough time to have a quick lunch in their cafe before the second film. I ordered a fabulous Yoghurt Soup and Shosh ordered batata chips (sweet potato chips) and a plate of mushroom burgers on a bed of lentil puree with a yoghurt sauce. Sounds good - no? Inedible. Not bad - just completely devoid of taste. Salt & pepper didn't help - nor did the yoghurt sauce. When the waitress came to give us our bill she saw that the plate of burgers was untouched. "Was something wrong?" she asked. "No - it just had no taste and we couldn't eat it" answered Shosh. In a flash she picked up our bill and returned with a new bill - with the burgers taken off the bill. We hadn't asked for a refund - we hadn't asked to have the dish removed from the bill - she just did it. Never happened to us before. But - I'll definitely go back there again - I'll just order Yoghurt Soup. That's logical.

Yalla, Bye.

THERE IS NO JUSTICE

2007-06-29T22:21:00.000+03:00

I am beyond anger. I am completely disgusted. And I know that justice has not been served.

I had the great luck to have to leave my house very early this morning so that I only had time to take in my newspapers but not the time to read them. Because when I arrived home this afternoon and finally had time to look at the papers the rest of my day was ruined.

Our former President - Moshe Katsav - read his name and weep - was allowed to plea bargain. He admitted to "indecent assault" - and "resigned" .

And our "esteemed" Attorney General - Meni Mazuz - facilitated this travesty of justice.

What has happened to us as a nation? Where is our sense of values? Where is our sense of justice? I won't go into all the whys and wherefores of the case against Mr. Katsav - you have all read them ad nauseum.

Why was Ofer Glazer ( the husband of Shari Arison) sent to prison for much the same charges? Why was Haim Ramon indicted for sexual harrassment - not rape? What about Yitzhak Mordechai?

And why was Moshe Katzav - who will plead guilty for "forcible assault" - a crime which carries a maximum penalty of seven years in prison - allowed to have the prosecution seek only a suspended sentence plus payment of compensation????

We should be ashamed of ourselves. No - on second thought - I am not ashamed of myself - I am ashamed of my government.

Following is a quote from the front page of today's HAARETZ: "The most astounding part of Attorney General Menachem Mazuz's press conference yesterday was his statement that the prosecution had enough evidence to justify indicting President Moshe Katsav on two counts of rape - a serious crime bearing a maximum sentence of 16 years in prison. If so, the plea bargain that Mazuz signed appears extremely unreasonable."

Unreasonable? It is downright idiotic. There is great outrage in the country and calls for Mazuz to resign. I concur. It was said that going ahead with Mr. Katsav's trial would lead to great division in the country and the lowering of respect for us in the eyes of the world. Hogwash. ##@&*^^@!!!

When I go abroad I am always careful to defend Israel's actions. How can I possibly defend this utter and total miscarriage of justice?

To the women who stood up to Mr. Katsav and had the courage to accuse him of unspeakable acts - I apologize to you on behalf of an Attorney General who is completely lacking in courage and common decency.

But wait - we are in for more fun and games. We will soon be served by a President - Shimon Peres - who, by his own admission, knew about Mr. Katsav's sexual proclivities and chose to remain silent.

There is something wrong with this picture.

Yalla, Bye.

THE WAY WE WERE

2007-06-26T00:13:00.000+03:00

When I came here thirty-two years ago we were free to go to almost any place we wanted to. When the weather was grey and cold in Jerusalem we drove for thirty-five minutes and we were in Jericho - where we sat outside in a garden restaurant and ate all kinds of good Arab food - in the sun and in the warmth - before stopping to shop for fresh fruits and vegetables in the outdoor market. Not any more.

My husband was great friends with Elias Freij - the then-mayor of Bethlehem - and his son, George Freij. We used to drive to Betlehem where my husband would pass the afternoon sitting and drinking endless cups of sweet, thick coffee with Elias and George and I would take my little plastic shopping basket and wander down to Milk Street where the grocery sold all sorts of things that weren't then imported into Israel - Philadelphia Cream Cheese and tinned tuna. Not any more.

I used to go to East Jerusalem to have my car repaired at Mr. Rizek's place. He was arguably the only absolutely straight and honest car mechanic I ever met. While my car was sitting at Mr. Rizek's I would walk around the corner to the City Grocery to shop and then cross the street to the family-owned florist to buy my flowers. Not any more.

This evening was a bitter-sweet reminder of what was and what could be again - if only.....

My friends, Yoav and Ernesto, invited me to a concert at the American Colony Hotel this evening. The concert was one of a series sponsored by the Austrian Music Encounter called "Sounding Jerusalem" - all taking place in various Arab sections of Israel - East Jerusalem, Ramallah, Jericho, Beit Hanina, Bethlehem....and there we were - Jew and Arab alike enjoying the classical music concert. The way it used to be.

During intermission Ernesto struck up a conversation with a young Arab man, Mohammad, who is an artist and the Cultural Page Editor of Al-Quds - a daily Arab newspaper. A charming and cultured young man whose family is from Jaffa. As we were going out to dinner afterward we invited him to come along - and Dalia, a friend of Yoav's and Ernesto's, who is here from Miami to attend a conference joined us, too.

So there we sat around a table in the garden of the Ambassador Hotel in East Jerusalem - one Israeli Arab, two American/Israelis, one German/Israeli and one Cuban/non-Jew - our very own United Nations.

And as I can't write anything without mentioning food - let me tell you the food and service were wonderful. We all shared fresh and delicious "meze" (those little plates of salad ubiquitous on Arab tables - but these were particularly outstanding), brains in a lemon sauce, stuffed spleen, kebabs, good wine, cold fresh watermelon and Turkish coffee. In the interest of being totally honest - only Ernesto and I ate the brains and spleen (that's stuffed miltz to those of you from Ashkenazi homes) - the rest turned up their collective noses. They don't know what they missed.

That's the way it used to be - that's the way I want it to be again - Jews - Arabs - non-Jews - sitting together as friends with no thought of ethnic background or origin. With no discussion of politics - not becuse we made any kind of decision not to discuss politics - there was just so much else to talk about. Will we ever be the way we were?

Yalla, Bye.

MAMMA MIA!

2007-06-17T21:31:00.000+03:00

Mamma Mia! What a week we've had here in Israel.

Shimon Peres was elected President of Israel. Can you imagine? At the age of 83 the man finally won an election. And already he's vowing to change the presidency to a more political position. Doesn't the man realize that all we want is some peace and quiet on that front? Just some nice ceremonies - accept foreign Ambassadors' credentials - have an open-house once a year - and dye-maspeek (enough already). Anyway - we won't have to worry about him running for a second term!!

Ehud Barak is now our new Minister of Defense - exactly what we need! At least he's better than that incompetent, Amir Peretz, who views the world through binoculars with the lens-cap still on. I still think we should have appointed Shaul Mofaz - but nobody asked me. Barak has his own agenda - he wants to be Prime Minister - again. This is his stepping-stone to that office. Will he be good for us? Only time will tell. But I probably won't vote for him.

Gaza is falling apart - Hamas and Fatah are killing each other - and everyone else who gets in their way.

And where are our leaders? Olmert and Livni are travelling the world - why should they stay here when they can be safely out of the fray?

But with all this mess in the country - there was still a ray of sunshine in my life last week - I saw MAMMA MIA! - for the second time mind you. The first time was in London when it opened a few years ago. Once again - it was wonderful - I enjoyed it just as much this time around.

As the show was all in English - for an Israeli audience who speaks Hebrew - there were large screens on each side of the stage which had - well, you can't call them super-titles or sub-titles - so I guess you have to call them side-titles - translations of all the dialogue and songs. Perhaps the dialogue part was necessary - but as for the words to the songs - the Israelis knew all the words to all the songs. How do I know? The audience burst into song with each new number. It was a lovely experience.

And at the end of the show - as one we all rose to our feet and began to dance along with the cast. It was such a fun evening - I don't think ABBA had any idea that their songs would have such a lasting impact on so many millions of people around the world. I checked on the internet and there are performances going on now in such far-flung places as Hong Kong, Spain, London, New York, Japan, Sweden and about twenty other countries.

If you get a chance to see the show - do! Be a Dancing Queen and Take A Chance On Me!

Yalla, Bye.

CHUTZPAH 101

2007-06-07T18:37:00.000+03:00

Do you know what "chutzpah" is? It's balls - having them in spades. The classic definition of chutzpah is - a young boy murders his parents - is brought to trial for murder - and then throws himself on the mercy of the court because he is an orphan. That's chutzpah!!

This past week I came across two of the most chutzpahdik actions I have ever encountered. One concerned me - the other didn't.

Last Saturday Bubbie - Marallyn's mother - was at home spending a nice restful day when all of a sudden all the electricity in her flat went off. The television stopped working - no lights - no refrigerator - no nothing. She checked - there was electricity in the hallway - so it wasn't a building problem. Her electricity simply stopped.

So what did she do? She called Marallyn, of course. And Marallyn - caring daughter that she is - and Reuevn (Marallyn's husband - an electrical contractor) jumped into the car and drove to Bubbie's house to solve the problem.

And what was the problem? Someone's main fuse obviously blew. What do you do on a Saturday when all the shops are closed? Steal a fuse from someone else's fuse box and put it in your own fuse box. And that is why she suddenly had no electricity. Chutzpah!!

Saturday seemed to be the day for chutzpah. On Saturday night my friends who were visiting from London (Pearl & Stewart and Joe) and I went out to dinner. We went to a restaurant downtown - where there is a serious dearth of parking spaces. Stewart was driving - a rental car - with the name of the car company plastered on the side door. Very obviously a rented car. Great luck - I spotted several spaces up the street from the restaurant. Why several spaces? Because they are "nechay" spots - handicapped parking. BUT - if you read the signs carefully it clearly states that it is "nechay" parking only during certain hours and certain days. Saturday nights are free - so to speak. We parked - and just to be sure - I walked back to the sign to read it again. Yup - free.

We had a lovely dinner - got back in the car and drove home. The next morning Pearl rang me and said - "You gave Stewart bad advice - he got a ticket for 500 shekels." Was I upset? I was extremely upset!! I told her what the sign said and advised her not to pay the ticket but to write to the police (there is an address on the ticket) and explain that we were in a legal spot.

In Israel you can pay your tickets at the Post Office. So off they went to the Post Office. And guess what? The ticket wasn't theirs. The driver of a car parked illegally across the street on the sidewalk got a ticket - folded it up into a little tiny square - and put it under Stewart's windscreen wipers - so that we never noticed it.

Stewart doesn't read Hebrew. Well - he "davens" (prays) - but those words don't help you in real life - so he never noticed that not only did the ticket not have his registration number - it also was issued for parking on the sidewalk - which we didn't. I suppose that the other driver saw a rental car and came up with the brilliant idea of putting his ticket on Stewart's car. Real chutzpah!

Aren't we Israeli's clever?

Yalla, Bye.

WHOOOPPPEEEE!!!

2007-05-31T20:18:00.000+03:00

For those of you who read this blog regularly and have not yet guessed that I am a real, dyed-in-the-wool, fanatic foodie - well, you just aren't reading carefully.

At this minute - as I am falling off my feet with exhaustion from having spent the last two days in my kitchen preparing a Shabbat dinner in honor of my friends Pearl and Stewart who are visiting from London - even as I am writing I am watching coming attractions on the television.

Coming attractions? Am I crazy you might well ask? No! I am not! I just received a phone call from Marallyn - who tells me that on YES cable channel 27 - which I now get having switched from HOT - there will appear on our screens - from June 11th - an Israeli version of the American FOODTV Network.

While this will mean nothing to my foreign readers - to my fellow Israeli food-freaks this is really something big.

Were you to ask me what I miss most about not living in New York I would answer immediately - The New York Times - Chinatown - the ability to buy almost anything in the world without having to make expeditions to far-flung places - my New York friends - my brother living an hour away by plane - and the FOODTV Network....in no particular order.

Incidentally - this whole preparation thing for tomorrow is not only for Pearl and Stewart. Our friend Joe is arriving in Jerusalem tomorrow - how could I be happy knowing someone is here on his own and has no place to spend Shabbat - and I've also invited Stewart's cousins Samuel and Judith and two of their (grown-up) kids and Ouri and Devora - who also know Pearl and Stewart. Besides my philosophy is - if you're going to cook for three you might as well cook for ten. So I'm really knocking myself out to do something special for them.

Right now, however, I've got to get some sleep. But I just had to give a heads-up to all of my Israeli friends - if you have YES - great. If you have HOT - switch!!

By the way - there is really something to be said for "bashert" (something which is meant to be). I swtiched from HOT to YES a few months ago because HOT threatened to remove BBC Prime from it's line-up. But with this new channel I would have had to switch anyway. Maybe this is an omen - where is my bashert? I'm waiting.

Yalla. Bye.

SHAVUOUT

2007-05-24T17:46:00.000+03:00

It seems to me that when I lived in the States we never made a big deal out of Shavuout - which we called - in the Ashkenazi Yiddish pronounciation - Shavoois.

Although we were very "Jewish" we weren't very religious and although we knew all about all the Jewish Holidays we really only celebrated the "biggies" - Pesach, Rosh Hashana, Yom Kippur and Chanukkah. Which we also pronounced differently, by the way. Sha-voo-OHT was Sha-VOO-iss, Rosh-Ha-Shann-AH was Rosh-Ha-SHONA, Yom-Kee-PUHR was Yom-KIPPER but Channukah and Pesach remained the same.

So it wasn't until I came to live here that I began to celebrate everything - especially the holidays that have wonderful food (!) - because the whole country celebrates and it's the way of life.

Which brings us to this past week when we celebrated Shavuout. Although Marallyn's daughter-in-law invited me to her dinner (which I heard was a real winner) I had already accepted an invitation to celebrate the holiday with my cousins Dizza and Ufaz in Beit Yitzhak. And what a celebration it was. Their two daughters Daria and Dafna were there with their boyfriends, Dizza's brother and sister-in-law Amihud and Aya were there (it's a bit complicated but Dizza's brother is not my cousin although in the way of Israelis we consider ourselves family), Dizza's best friend's daughter, and two old friends of their's Nahum and Tzippi.

Dizza is a wonderful cook and the most relaxed hostess I have ever met. And besides - I love being with them all - so I really enjoyed the holiday - and although it is quite a long ride there was hardly any traffic so even the drive was fun.

I am sure you are wondering by now - what did we eat? Shavuout is the holiday when we don't eat meat - only fish and dairy - and lots of cheeses. We started with spinach soup - for which I am going to get the recipe it was that good. Then - God forbid anybody should feel hungry without meat or chicken - she made three quiches - a broccoli, an onion and a zucchini - a cheese ball with Roquefort, butter and cream cheese and rolled in walnuts which we ate with very good bread, a pasta dish of shells mixed with a Mornay sauce and bits of ham (she doesn't keep kosher) and baked in the oven (so she cheated a bit with the ham - who cares it was so good), a lettuce and tomato salad, a cabbage salad with tiny green peas and a beet salad with horseradish. And of course some good wine - which was fine with me as I was staying over and could drink without worrying about the alcohol content in my blood.

And for dessert I made two cheesecakes - one regular New York-style cheesecake and one with melted white chocolate and raspberry jam.

We talked and laughed and ate - and ate - and ate - in the way of all the Jews in Israel. And when everyone left Dizza and I sat on the patio and talked - and talked - and talked until 1:30 in the morning. And also drank some more - delicious iced plum wine which Daria brought from her Japanese cooking class.

Hope your holiday was a much fun as mine was. And as I always say - back to the diet.

Yalla, Bye.

CAN I "SCHVITZ"?

2007-05-17T08:06:00.000+03:00

In Hebrew to "schvitz" means to brag - unlike in Yiddish where "schvitz" means to sweat. In any event - I'm "schvitzing" in Hebrew.

It's a long story - but "b'kitzur" (in short) - several weeks ago I was asked to write a guest column for the Thursday "Weekend" Magazine of the Jerusalem Post. What about? Need you ask? Food, of course.

I was asked to choose a theme - e.g. Quick Meals - Children's Menu - Party Time - but I chose my own theme - "Too Hot To Cook" - which was renamed "Cold Comfort". No problem with that - because my three recipes were published just as I wrote them - commentary and all. What a "kef" (fun) to see my name in print. My article had a whole page - how do you like that? In fact, I was so impressed with the menu I came up with that I'm using it as a basis for a Shabbat dinner I'm having in two weeks for friends from London and Ramat HaSharon.

Now - if the magazine will only hire me to write the restaurant reviews - that means I can dine out every day and not pay!!

Talking about eating out (nice segue wasn't it?) - I just realized that I ate in restaurants in five out of the last six days - not counting the various cafes where I drank coffee with friends. (It sounds as if all I do is eat - definitely not true - I also cook - shop - talk about food - write about food - sit on various Boards - do my charity work - well, O.K. - my life is mostly about food.)

Last night Roz (with a "Z"), her daughter Maya, friends of hers from New Zealand and I ate at "Tzachko" in the shuk. Again - a marvelous meal. And again - we ordered loads of dishes which we shared - the food is just too good to be restricted to only one or two dishes a person. Eli Mizrachi owns the restaurant which he named after his father - who father passed away just over a week ago. Roz, Maya and I were to meet her friends at the restaurant. She told them approximately where the restaurant is - told them how to get to the shuk - and also told them to ask for explicit directions when they got there.

Only in Israel. When they got to the shuk and asked for explicit directions - the answer was always preceeded by - "Do you know Eli's father died? Are you sure the restaurant is open?" Everyone knows everyone else's business - I actually like that. In fact, as were walking through the shuk to the restaurant , we passed the stall of "David HaDayag" (David the Fisherman) where I buy my fish. We greeted each other and he said to me "Go over to Yossi's (another son) stall and give them your condolences." Everyone is a Jewish mother here.

May the Mizrachi family be comforted among the mourners of Zion and Jerusalem.

Yalla, Bye.

WHY?....WHY NOT?

2007-05-11T10:38:00.000+03:00

Just some random thoughts that came into my mind during the past week...

- Why - when you have no place special to go or no one special to see - does your hair look great?
- Why - when you have lots of time to do something - you just can't seem to get it done?
- Why - when you are looking your absolute worst - do you run into someone you want to impress?
- Why does your doorbell ring at just the moment you can't possibly answer it?
- Why - when your phone hasn't rung for hours - does it ring just as you are dashing out?
- Why is there no traffic when you have plenty of time to drive somewhere?
- Why do you break a nail just after you've had a manicure - and put on red red polish?
- Why does it rain the first time you wear those ridiculously expensive shoes?
- Why does your computer stop working for no reason?
- Why - when you are driving to someplace new - and you have a choice of turning right or left - do you always make the wrong choice?

Does this sound as if I've had a bad week? Well.... yes. Although some things went just fine. Had guests for dinner Monday night - the hottest night of the year so far - and the air conditioner worked perfectly. This year I had the good sense to call the air conditioner guy to check the system out and make sure there was enough gas before the summer began with full force and everyone else wanted him at the same time.

My dinner went well - after a lot of tweaking and changing of recipes - one guest doesn't eat tarragon so I changed the chicken recipe I planned to do - what I actually did was to make two chickens - one with tarragon and one without. I was going to make a fruit crumble - but another guest doesn't eat fruits beginning with the letter "p" - pears - peaches - plums and papricots!! So I made Myra's delicious and creamy and not-at-all-parve-tasting parve chocolate ice cream cake. Easy enough. And we all ate and drank and talked and laughed until midnight.

And here's the best part of the week - did you read last week's blog? The one where I wrote about that smug, self-satisfied little man who has made driving in this city such a nightmare? I was so angry that I wrote a letter to the Jerusalem Post - where the article appeared. This morning I got a call from Bubbie Chana - Marallyn's mother - to say that she was reading her paper and saw that my letter had been published. So there Mr. Bartov.

By the way - we really have to keep Bubbie Chana well and hopping. She's our lifeline to the world. Nevermind that I read two newspapers every day and listen to the news - American and Israeli. But most of the time I'm out and running around and can't keep up with all the events. Bubbie Chana keeps up with everything - all day - every day. She knows exactly what's happening - and calls us with a heads-up. She neither reads nor speaks Hebrew - but watches the news programs with great interest. When there is (G-d forbid) a "pigua" (bombing) - she knows it from the map on the TV and the little star showing where it occurred - and she calls us. She's our own private Associated Press.

Myra just came to visit - she was at the shuk (market) and bought me Belgian endive - perfectly white and beautiful - for 40 shekel a kilo - instead of the 60 shekel per kilo I have to pay at my local - and very fancy - greengrocer. So - I'll say Yalla, Bye - and have a nice visit with her.

Rena

MY COUNTRY, MY CITY...MY GOODNESS

2007-05-03T09:26:00.000+03:00

I once had a French teacher, Benedict D'Arlon, (well, his name was really Benjamin Schwartz but he felt that wasn't an appropriate name for a French teacher) who used to say "the world is going to hell in a handbasket". I never quite understood that - I don't even know what a handbasket is - but his meaning was loud and clear. And that's the way I feel today.

As I do each morning - I picked up my newspapers from my mailbox, made my first cup of tea of the day, lit my cigarette (yes, I smoke) - and began to read. You must all know by now of the political problems we are having here. To add to our woes - Hassan Nasrallah opined that our Winograd Commission Report now says conclusively that we lost the 2nd Lebanon War. We really needed to hear that from him. Avigdor Yitzchaki resigned....only to be replaced by Tzachi Hanegbi who is under indictment. Ehud Olmert refuses to resign. Tzippi Livni wants to be Prime Minister. Shimon Peres wants to be....anything - just elect him. Moshe Katzav wants the rape charges against him to be dropped and Azmi Bishara - an Arab Member of Knesset - is being charged with treason for helping the enemy during the 2nd Lebanon War.

Tzippi Livni wants Olmert to resign - she, however, will not resign. Amir Peretz says he doesn't have to resign because the Winograd Report didn't blame him as much as it blamed the others - Olmert and Dan Halutz - he says - "true - I have no Defense experience but I'm learning". Did you ever hear such "mishugass" (craziness)?

In the meantime, Sallai Meridor, Israeli Ambassador to the United States says that the Syrian military is undergoing its largest buildup since 1973 - remember the Yom Kippur War? Vos noch? (Yiddish - what else?) And that was only on the front page!!

Closer to home - closer to my home, that is - the traffic in Jerusalem has become more and more impossible to deal with. Some little smug, self-satisfied functionary (Kobi Bartov if you want to curse him personally) says that he can't forbid people from driving into downtown Jerusalem but he can - and will - make life miserable for us drivers. And he is doing that - with a vengeance. By the way - he also says that he doesn't care what people say about him - "write what you will" he said to the journalist who wrote the article telling us about his plans for the traffic.

To add to our traffic woes - Jerusalem is erecting a Calatrava Bridge at the entrance to the city. Work goes on day and night - both at the entrance to the city and along the highway. When we drove home from a party in the North at 11:00 last night we were stuck in the kind of traffic jam you expect to see only during rush hour. The bridge will help move the traffic along that Mr. Bartov doesn't want here.

And to add the cherry to the icing on the cupcake - the weatherman said yesterday that the rain would finally stop. After two weeks of not having my car washed - yesterday dawned bright and sunny. Shachar - my car wash guy - said all was well - go ahead and wash the car - finally. The car wash was jammed - full of people like me who want to drive in clean, shiny cars. I waited - I had the car washed - I was happy. And then this morning - when it wasn't supposed to rain, mind you - it RAINED - for only two minutes - those big, fat raindrops with a grain of sand in each drop - and my lovely white car is - once again - yellow.

And you want to know why I still live here? Because it's MY country.

Yalla, Bye.

Rena

GOURMET OR GOURMAND

2007-04-28T18:25:00.000+03:00

The other day there was a program on TV - BBC Prime to be exact - which was called "50 Things To Eat Before You Die". I thought - oh, great - I'll discover all kinds of things I haven't eaten yet. Wrong - there were only eight items I haven't eaten - most of them because I haven't yet been to the countries where they are indigenous. I starred the ones I never ate. The comments are mine.

The items were chosen by consensus but I don't know who the respondents were or how they were picked. In any event - the foods were a big surprise to me, mostly because they are so ordinary that I can't imagine going through life without them.

50-Cornish Pasties - satisfying
49-Caviar - love the taste and the feel of those little eggs bursting in my mouth
48-Haggis - not nearly as terrible as one would think
47-* Jerk Chicken
46-Tapas - the most wonderful bits to eat in Spain while drinking a glass of sherry
45-Roast Beef - and Yorkshire Pudding at Sunday lunch in England
44-Ribs - juicy ones at the Black Steer in Motza near Jerusalem
43-Octopus - prefer calamari
42-* Durian
41-Mango - the best fruit ever, especially if you are in India when they are in season
40-* Meat Pie - from a particular place in Sydney, Australia
39-Scallops - lightly cooked with the roe attached - try it on skewers alternating with bacon
38-Kebabs - Doner Kebab in Turkey, any kebab in Israel
37-* Reindeer
36-* Silver Baramundi - a fish from Australia
35-Paella - wonderful when made well with lots of seafood, hold the chicken
34-Sushi - one of my favorites - especially yellowtail with scallions and salmon skin rolls
33-Shark - absolutely delicious on a barbecue
32-* Guinea Pig - from South America
31-Venison - love it with lingonberry jam and pureed chestnuts
30-Salmon - fresh, moist, slightly undercooked
29-American Diner Breakfast - eggs, bacon, sausages, hash browns, toast, coffee
28-Squid - or calamari - fried, especially in Greece on an Island
27-Fajitas/Chicken Mole - tied for 27th place
26-Hamburgers - the real thing (not Burger King or McDonalds) juicy, rare, with all the fixin's
25-Snails - and do sop up the garlic butter with good bread
24-Sandwiches - no soggy packaged breads please - thick with interesting fillings
23-Chocolate - like Leonides, Daskalides, Teuscher - the good ones only
22-* Kangaroo
21-Oysters - fresh, icy cold with just a squeeze of lemon - no bottled red sauce
20-Alligator - not my favorite
19-Cream Tea - with scones and clotted cream and strawberry preserves - divine
18-Lamb - lovely and pink and delicate
17-Cheesecake - the old-fashioned kind from long-ago Lindy's in New York
16-Mussels - "moules frites" and ice cold white wine at Chez Leon in Brussels with Fred
15-Pasta - any and all - just not that glop in cans
14-Pancakes - how do you lilke that? Something I don't like to eat!!
13-Barbecue - anything and everything tastes better done on the grill
12-Clam Chowder - Creamy "New England" - not "Manhattan" - big difference
11-* Morton Bay Bugs - shellfish
10-Prawns - the best ones I had were at the Bay of Bengal in Southern India at "The Wharf"
9-Curry - delicious - but you know I like India
8-Crabs - boiled crab dinner in Maryland, the legs at "Joe's Stone Crab" in Miami
7-Pizza - none of those awful toppings. Just tomato, cheese and (sometimes) pepperoni
6-Ice Cream - real vanilla, mint-chocolate chip, coffee and pistachio
5-Chinese Food - I'm Jewish, aren't I? Sunday night in New York without chinese food?
4-Thai Food - the sohpisticate's Chinese Food
3-Steak - for me, skirt steak or T-Bone - very rare
2-Lobster - steamed or boiled - with just a bit of melted butter
1-Fresh Fish - now, there's a surprise - who would've thought that would be #1

And this list doesn't even begin to note my personal favorites. But that's for another time.

Yalla, Bye.

Rena

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ISRAEL

2007-04-20T23:53:00.000+03:00

The first time I came to Israel was in April 1975. It was the day before Yom HaAtzmaut - Israeli Independence Day - and it was Israel's 27th birthday.

Tuesday is, once again, Yom HaAtzmaut - and it will be Israel's 59th birthday.

What an incredible introduction to Israel that was. My parents' friends, Haim and Moni Glovinsky, came to my hotel in Tel Aviv and took me out to show me how Israelis celebrated. We walked through the crowded streets - people were hitting each other on the head with plastic hammers which went "ping" when they made contact - no, it didn't hurt at all - they bought me a hammer as a souvenir - we ate ice cream - and I was amazed to see soldiers holding machine guns stationed on the roofs of the buildings. It was a Yom HaAtzmaut I will always remember - but as an outsider - I wasn't part of Israel - I wasn't yet an Israeli.

Fast forward 32 years. I have been an Israeli for many years. I have the most wonderful circle of friends - and today I celebrate Yom HaAtzmaut differently.

But before we celebrate we Remember. Yes - Remember with a capital "R" - because Monday is Remembrance Day - when we recall and pay homage to our fallen soldiers. It's a very solemn day - very sad - very poignant - and we light memorial candles to honor our dead. And immediately afterward - we begin to celebrate our Independence.

It's really emblematic of our lives here. We have very high "highs" and very low "lows". We have always been in a struggle for our existence - and then we "pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and start all over again" - just as in the song.

So this year will be the same for me. I will light my candle on Sunday night and recall those who gave their lives for us. And on Monday night I'll go to the annual big party at Sally & Michael's house along with some other friends.

And on Tuesday - the annual countrywide barbecue. I'll be celebrating with Marallyn and her extended family once again. We'll begin barbecueing in the morning and only finish when there is no more room for one more morsel of food. Marallyn is a Canadian who married into a Kurdi family. (Kurdi - as in from Kurdistan) Kurdim don't know from green. And they certainly don't know from potato salad and cole slaw. Well - maybe an Israeli chopped salad, and some "salat hatzililm" (eggplant salad) and "hamutzim" (pickles and olives) - but that's it.

But meat? Everything you can imagine - and then some. And you want to know why I'm always on a diet?

Almost forgot - I'm going to Sarah's birthday party on Wednesday - and you still want to know why I'm always on a diet?

Yalla, Bye.

Rena

THIS 'N' THAT

2007-04-15T08:06:00.000+03:00

Was trying to sign in to get to my blogsite a portent of things to come? Every once in a while my computer "forgets" me - today was one of those days. I tried every imaginable combination I thought I remembered - finally - success. Here I am. However - the big question remains - which combination of username and password did the trick? Each time this happens I swear I will write down the proper words - I always forget. Maybe next time?

Have any of you been following the brouhaha around the dismissal of Don Imus from his radio talk-show in the States? True - he said some outrageous and disgusting things about the female, Black basketball players from New Jersey. Totally and completely uncalled for and gratuitously racist. Certainly grounds for dismissal.

However - who was leading the charge for his dismissal? None other than those two upstanding individuals - the Reverends (?!!?) Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson. Those two holier-than-thou rabble rousers. Does anyone remember Al Sharpton and the Tawana Brawley outrage of several years ago? And even more egregious - does no one remember Jesse Jackson calling New York "Hymietown"? An in-your-face slap at the Jews.

Shame on them - and shame on all the talking heads on American television who have allowed those actions to be forgotten. Are we now living through selective racism? Is is okay to "dis" the Jews but not "dis" the Blacks?

Last Wednesday Roz and I went to Herzliya Pituach - just to wander through the Mall, sit at the Marina and have some lunch - you know - just hang out. For those of you to whom this is not important - you will not have been aware that the US dollar has been dropping in value against the shekel. However - we who live on American dollars are "chalishing" (fainting).

Exactly one year ago we were getting 4.70 shekels to the dollar. On Wednesday, as I was driving to Herzliya, I had the radio on. At 10:00 AM the rate was 4.10. While I was parking my car the 11 o'clock news reported the rate at 4.08. And as I was driving home to Jerusalem the 4 o'clock news reported the rate as 4.06.

This morning I awoke to the news that the rate is just a bit over 4!! What a tremendous drop in buying power. I've lived through three currencies here - first the Lira - which was changed to the Shekel - which devalued so quickly - hundreds of points in a year - that the currency was again switched - to the New Shekel. What now?

All in all - not a great week. For those of you who also read Marallyn's blog - she hasn't been on line for a while - her mother-in-law - Savta Simcha - passed away last week and Marallyn has been taking care of her husband and his siblings while they are sitting shiva. May they be counted among the mourners of Zion and Jerusalem.

Here's hoping for a better week next week.

Yalla, Bye.

Rena

DAI - MASPEEK

2007-04-09T18:02:00.000+03:00

In Hebrew when you say "dai - maspeek" - you mean "enough already - stop - no more".

And that's where I am now. I've had enough of Pesach. I'm ready to move on. Enough matza - enough kneidlach (matza balls) - enough gefilte fish - enough of thinking what it's OK to eat and what's not OK to eat. Enough of eating - period.

Which is not to say that I haven't had fun. Holiday dinners and lunches with my friends - what could be more fun than getting together with your friends? Including a great Shabbat lunch with my friends Riva (of the India trip) and David and their blended families. We've been friends so long that I've watched the grandchildren grow up and marry - and have been to a baby-naming of a grandchild - and realized on Saturday that the "baby" is now a big girl.

Marallyn and I went out for our usual Friday morning breakfast - on Sunday - which really blew my mind - because Sunday was erev-Chag (the day before the last holiday of Pesach) and it felt like Friday - because Friday is also a short day as it's right before Shabbat. In fact - I have been so mixed up with the days because of the holidays that I forgot to light my candles on Friday night - because it didn't feel like Friday. Are you feeling the same way?

Tonight it's over - in Israel anyway. Then it's back to real life - and time for me to get back to cooking - what? cooking you say? - yes - cooking for my own guests. It's time for me to get back to being a hostess and not always a guest - although I must say that I love being a guest - it's fun to eat someone elses food - see what other people do - how others serve.

And time to go back on that damned diet - the bane of my existence - you absolutely cannot diet during Pesach. So tonight the leftover matza goes out - yes, I know it's a sin to waste food but dai-maspeek - enough already - and to tell you the truth there's not that much matza left over.

To quote Marallyn - "Yahoo - Pesach is over - now we can look forward to Yom HaAtzmaut (Independence Day) - so that we can go to a barbecue - and eat some more".

I'm going to change my sign-off - I will always wish for you to "Stay Safe" - but I'm going to use a real Israeli expression to say goodbye - until next time -

Yalla, bye.

Rena

COEXISTENCE - or - PLURALISM - or - WHATEVER YOU WANT TO CALL IT

2007-04-05T17:11:00.002+03:00

Yesterday Rosalyn (Roz) and I drove to Tel Aviv to see the new Mark Rothko exhibit at the Tel Aviv Museum. On the way we stopped at the train station to pick up her friend, Max, who was coming down from Haifa to meet us.

We parked in the designated place - under a sign which read "Parking for pick-up and drop-off of train passengers". There were actual places marked off for parking your car. The sign did not say "Standing for pick-up and drop-off of train passengers". It clearly said PARKING. So we parked the car and walked the twenty or so steps to the front of the train station and waited for Max. When we returned to the car - it wasn't there. It had been towed. Not merely ticketed - towed. Forget the long story - we got into a cab - drove to the Reading Station - and bought back her car. And then on to the museum. Really - only in Israel.

I won't bother to tell you about the exhibit - suffice it to say that I don't "get" Mark Rothko. I didn't understand his paintings when I saw them in the States and I don't understand them now. Who knows - perhaps I am just a philistine - he doesn't talk to me. I wondered - if he were not Mark Rothko would people rush to see his paintings? Or does the emperor have no clothes?

Anyway - after hours at the museum we were feeling peckish - really quite hungry. So we drove up to the Port - which has now become very "in" with all manner of wonderful restaurants - and we decided to eat at Gilly's. As we walked onto the outside deck area we noticed on some of the tables bread baskets - holding rolls - not Pesachdik matza-meal rolls - real honest-to-goodness rolls - and alongside the bread baskets were plates of matzot. Roz and I, of course, do not eat bread and rolls during Pesach - chametz, remember? - and so we sent the rolls back. However - we shared a large platter of the most succulent fish and shrimp and calamari!! Max had cheese burgers - six small cheese burgers served on bread with slices of tomato. He said they were delicious. But I suppose it was OK to eat that because two negatives make one positive - bread during Pesach - a no no - cheese and meat together - also a no no - two no no's equal one yes yes. Right?

So today - my darling funny friends, Yoav and Ernesto, took me to lunch in Abu Gosh. Now - bear in mind that we were in an Arab restaurant in the middle of an Arab village. The patrons? All Israelis. And what do we see on some of the tables? Matzot. What clever businessmen the owners are. We started with "meze" - many small plates of all kinds of salads - including hummus - but as we eat "kitniot" (beans and legumes) during Pesach we were fine. They, very wisely, refrained from serving us "kubbe" ( those deep-fried torpedo-shaped goodies stuffed with meat and "znobarim" (pine nuts) and made with a shell of burghul wheat - and "sigarim" - rolled phyllo pastry also stuffed with meat and znobarim) - because we asked for matza instead of pita. No chametz - remember?

Wine? - we were offered our choice of two kinds of wine - both from among the best Israeli "yekevim" (vineyards) - both absolutely kosher-for-Pesach.

And the main course? - what's not to eat - a mixed grill of lamb chops, kebabs, chicken livers and pargiot (a sort of small, succulent chicken). And, of course, chips (french fries). So what's not kosher-for-Pesach there?

Need I tell you what a wonderful time we had? We didn't stop talking for one minute - we solved all the problems of the world - or, at least, the Middle East.

Now - I put it to you - if we can live in peace and harmony with our Arab neighbors --- viz. the Israelis come to their village and eat in their restaurants - the Arabs respect the fact that - while we don't necessarily eat "kosher" - many of us still aren't willing to eat chametz during Pesach - and they go to the trouble to buy matza for us to eat during Pesach --- why can't we come to terms with a peaceful coexistence on a broader plane?

Very simplistic, I know - but we have to begin somewhere. Maybe matza instead of pita during Pesach is a good beginning.

Stay Safe.

Rena

TODAY'S THE DAY

2007-04-02T08:37:00.000+03:00

I have spent the last three days cooking. Before that was the marketing and preparing. I'm not cooking another thing for the rest of my life - a bit of an exaggeration to be sure - but at the moment I'm not interested in preparing anything more than a cup of coffee.

So - what did I cook and bake?

270 Meringue cookies
90 Coconut Pyramids
2 Apple cakes
Countless kilos of driet fruit for compote
2 1/2 kilos (5 pounds) of gefilte fish

And where do you think all this is going? Some to Devora for tomorrow - some to Shosh for the Seder tonight - some to Marallyn - some to Yossi - some to Ros - and I took a big box of the cookies to the hairdresser yesterday. That's all folks!!

In a few hours I'll pack the food into the car and drive up to Even Yehuda to Ouri & Devora's. From there we'll drive in the evening to Ramat HaSharon for the Seder - then back to Even Yehuda. Then on Tuesday there is Devora's traditional day-after-the-Seder lunch. And then - back to Jerusalem.

Here's an interesting factoid (I hate that word but I wanted to use it just once - never again). As everyone is busy cooking and preparing for the Seder - the night before is one of the biggest night for the pizza places. Many of my friends had pizza for dinner last night. First - because you don't have to cook it - and second - people need their "chametz" (food that isn't kosher-for-Pesach -especially bread and wheat products) fix before the start of the Holiday. After all, you can't eat bread for eight days!!!

I, on the other hand, actually like matzoth - so for me it isn't an "onesh" (punishment) not to have bread. And as my friend, Yossi, says - "You can't eat gefilte fish without a nice piece of matza". I particularly love whole-wheat matzo - but I also bought a box of regular matzo so I can make Matzo Brei - one of the great taste treats of Pesach. By the way - once I tried making Matzo Brei during the year - not the same. You have to have it during Pesach.

Have a Happy Pesach - enjoy your friends and families - do eat too much - it's part of the tradition - and glory in the fact that the Jews - all over the world - are celebrating along with you.

Stay Safe.

Rena

MA NISHTANA.......

2007-03-29T11:00:00.000+02:00

Two things happened in the past few days which made me decide to write this particular blog. The first thing was an email from my cousin, Cynthia, who lives in California and who asked me what we do differently here in Israel to celebrate Pesach (Passover). And the second was phone calls from my friends, Myra and Brenda, who asked me for recipes for Haroset (a fruit and nut paste symbolizing mortar which we use during the Pesach Seder).

Myra and Brenda are both Ashkenazim - but they both wanted Sephardi Haroset recipes. That started me thinking about the differences - and the similarities. Actually - when you get down to it there is one big difference - the food. The Seder is the Seder - we all read the Haggada (the story of the Jews' exodus from Egypt). And while there may be minor differences in the text and in the translations - the story is essestially the same.

We read the first part of the Haggada - we eat - we read the second part of the Haggada - we sing the traditional songs - ve zehoo (and that's it). Well - some of us don't get to read the second part of the Haggada - but that's another story.

The first big difference is that here in Israel we only celebrate one Seder while Jews in the Diaspora celebrate two - except for Jews from the Diaspora who are only visiting here during Pesach - and then they have two Seders. (This is really getting complicated - I'll try to keep it to the basics.)

There are - mostly - Ashkenazi and Sephardic Jews. The Ashkenazim come - mostly - from Middle - and Eastern-Europe and the Sepharadim come - mostly - from places like Spain, Morocco, Algeria, Kurdistan - all other places that are not Middle - and Eastern - Europe. Then there are the Yemenites and the Ethiopians - this is getting too, too complicated. Let's just leave it as Ashkenazim and Sepharadim for our purposes.

So - now to the food. Sepharadim eat rice during Pesach - Ashkenazim do not. Except for most of the Ashkenazim I know - including me - who have been here so long that we have also adopted rice as part of our Pesach diet. Of course - none of us eat bread and things made with flour that can rise - but some of us eat beans and legumes. Don't ask.

Ashkenazim traditionally eat hard-boiled eggs and salt water as part of the ceremonial foods - in my friend Marallyn's house they eat the hard-boiled eggs but with very salty boiled meat instead of the salted water. Her husband is Kurdi and that's their custom.

In America we did not ever eat roast lamb as part of the Seder - here we do. We never served tongue as part of the meal - here some people do. When I was studying with the noted Italian cookbook author and teacher Edda Servi Machlin ("The Clasic Cuisine of the Italian Jews") - she invited me to their Seder one year and their traditional main course was a meat loaf made of ground veal.

Ashkenazim traditionally serve gefilte fish - sweet for the Polish Jews and salt & pepper for the Russian Jews - and Sepharadim eat "chraime" - fish poached in a spicy tomato sauce. And in Edda's Italian family they ate cold poached fish in aspic.

Asheknazi Haroset is traditionally made with ground walnuts, apples, cinnamon and sweet wine. I had actually never even heard of any other way to do it until I moved here. In looking through my cookbooks last night I found Haroset made with dates, apricots, silan (date honey), walnuts, sesame seeds, almonds,cardamon and cloves - in various combinations -and cooked - from the other communities.

I'll be having Seder with Shosh and Gaby - Ouri and Devora's "mehutanim" (the parent's of their son's wife). Shosh is from a Polish family and Gaby is Egyptian. Gaby makes "kubbe" - a deep-fried delicacy usually made from a dough of burghul wheat and stuffed with ground meat. For Pesach the "dough" is made from ground rice - remember - no wheat.

Oh - I forgot one big difference - the melody used to sing the "vier kashes" (Yiddish) or "arba she'elot" "Hebrew) or "four questions". In fact, when Marallyn and I were trying to remember the melody of the four questions we sang in North America - we couldn't - and we had to call her Mom to remind us of it. There used to be a cartoon strip here that was titled "You've been here too long if......" I think I've reached that point.

And for my non-Jewish readers - especially my loyal "Jungle Mom" in Venezuela - who doesn't understand half of what I say but bravely reads on anyway - the title of this blog "MA NISHTANA....." are the first words of the four questions - "Why is this night different from every other night?" And it is different - but it's also the same for all of us - each celebrating in our own ways. Pesach Sameach - Happy Pesach. Have I confused you enough?

Stay Safe.

Rena

COUNTDOWN TO PESACH

2007-03-26T09:08:00.000+02:00

For the past several weeks the first question you ask when you meet someone is not - "How are you?" - but rather - "Do you know what you're doing for Pesach?"

Except for only twice over the past thirty years - more or less - I have spent Pesach with Ouri and Devora and their kids - and sometimes my extended family (the Cohens and Sklars and Steins from England and Scotland) and with Ouri and Devora's extended family - the Nagars from Ramat HaSharon - and close friends like Irit from Givatayyim. Even when Devora was living in the States as visiting Professor of Jewish Studies at Lehigh University in Pennsylvania Ouri came over for Pesach and we had Seder with my friends Alan and Jess in New York.

Once during all that time I had Seder with my cousins Dizza & Pazzi and Aya & Amihud (not because I don't love them but because Pesach belongs to Devora and Rosh HaShana belongs to Dizza) - and once with Myra and Arnon at Arnon's brother and sister-in-law's Dudu & Rochele.

This year was going to be somewhat different. Ouri & Devora decided to opt out of Seder - Ouri had a "juk b'rosh" (a cockroach in the head - a bee in his bonnet) - and decided that Pesach wasn't for him this year. Dizza & Pazzi are going off to Crete - so what was I going to do?

Well, my gentle readers (shades of Victorian novels) - there are times I think that despite my Jewish-soap-opera life I am really one lucky lady. In answer to "What are you doing for Pesach?" - when I replied "I'm not sure yet" - the invitations began to pour in. From Ros and her daughter Atanya to Atanya's mother-in-law's house where they always have Seder. From Roz to be with her family. From Brenda to be with her family. From Myra and Arnon. From Marallyn.

And in the end - because Ouri has gotten rid of his "juk" - I'll be - as usual - with Ouri & Devora and the Nagars (O & D's "mechutanim" - a word for which there is no English equivalent - it means the parents of a child's spouse). And I'll be thinking of all my friends who invited me - and because of whom I know I'll never be alone on a holiday.

So - now begins the countdown to Pesach. Yesterday I bought all the "had pa'ami" (one time use) containers to transport the food I'm making. Today Ros and I are going to a Pesach food and gift fair - who knows what we'll find? Tomorrow I have to go to the shuk to order my fish for gefilte fish and buy the dried fruits for the compote - what's Pesach without compote? And then I have to buy all the bits and bobs for the rest of my contributions - nuts and eggs and chocolate chips and matza meal and matza cake flour and potato flour - and... and...and...

I'll keep you posted on how it's all going. The truth is we all complain about how much work there is to get ready for Pesach - but the truth also is that we love it - the continuity - the connection - the fact that never ever in my life have I ever not gone to a Seder - preparing the same traditional foods - and being with friends and family. And the truth also is - I'm glad I live in Israel because here we only celebrate one night of Seder!!

Stay Safe.

Rena

A SLICE OF (OUR) LIVES

2007-03-23T13:07:00.000+02:00

Today is Friday - so Marallyn and I went out for our usual Friday morning breakfast. We ate at one of our usual favorite places. And then we went to our usual favorite museum.

Favorite museum? Yes - the MEGA supermarket in The Mall. I don't know about you - but when I travel I go to supermarkets. They tell you how people live - what they eat - how their lives differ from mine. And I also like my own supermarkets - there is always something new. Not like the days of old in Israel when you had a choice of white cheese or yellow cheese. Red wine or white wine. Romaine lettuce or Romaine lettuce!

{By the way - my favorite supermarkets to date are the Akmerkaz in Istanbul; Tesco's in Prague; C-Town in Amman; and the food halls at Harrod's in London and KaDeWe in Berlin.)

So there we were in the cleaning supplies aisle because I decided that I needed to buy toilet bowl disinfectant. You know - those little thingies that you hang from the rim of the toilet bowl to keep it fresh. There used to be one choice (see above). Today you have many choices. Here's how the conversation went:

Rena: Look at all these choices -what should I buy? Here's one at 3 for NIS 20.90. But here's another for NIS 14.90 for 1. I want to try it out - I'll just buy one.

Marallyn: What do you want it to smell like? Afarsekim (peaches)?

R: Nah - not peaches in the bathroom.

M: Here's one that looks nice - take that.

R: OK - but how does it work? (This one was really complicated - it not only had a written explanation on the back of the package - it also had three pictures!! Three pictures to explain a toilet bowl cleaner?)

M: How does it work? You just...... Wait a minute - you just push this thingie in...... No - you just pull that thingie out......

R: Never mind - I'll take the three for 20.90 - but I really don't want to spend 20.90.

Now - you have to understand that NIS 20.90 is about $5.00 - for three - not exactly an exhorbitant amount.

M: It's not diamonds - it's only 21 shekels - if you don' like it you'll throw it out.

And so I took the three for 21 shekels.

During this whole production there was a very nice-looking man standing next to us. I noticed him in passing and thought he was also trying to decide what to buy. Not at all - because as soon as I decided what to buy he walked away. As we left the aisle I walked one way and Maralyn walked the other (that's also a private joke - don't ask) - and as she turned around to look for me she and the man locked eyes - she shrugged - and they both smiled - and Marallyn and I began to laugh.

We couldn't stop laughing - we were helpless with laughter. Two smart ladies, well dressed, bright - and having this absolutely serious conversation about how to work a toilet bowl thingie.

I wonder what he told his wife when he went home. Is he laughing as much as we are?

Stay Safe.

Rena

BUT FOR THE GRACE OF G-D - part II

2007-03-20T14:45:00.000+02:00

If you read my blog on Sunday you'll know that today I was scheduled to visit another MELABEV day-care center for those suffering from Alzheimer's and other dementias. It was, again, a traumatic day for me - but so uplifting that I had to write about it.

The center I visited today is located in Pisgat Ze'ev - part of Jerusalem but a long way out from the center of town. This is a purpose-built center - unlike our other centers which are housed, for the moment, in whatever appropriate space we can find - unused bomb shelters - the basement of a synagogue - any place we can call "home".

The center in Pisgat Ze'ev houses both English and Russian-Speaking groups. The Russian group is, for the most part, very highly educated and also relatively high-functioning - and it's that group which had me disolved in tears.

The people are still quite aware of what is going on around them - and kept asking the regular workers who we - Ida and I - were. I was asked to say a few words - in Hebrew - about who we were and why we were there - and Nili translated into Russian. At the end of her translation one of the Russian women asked to speak. She told us that in Russia she had been a cardiologist. Now she is in Israel - a member of MELABEV - and said "if it weren't for MELABEV I would be lying in the ground".

When she finished speaking her friend, who was sitting next to her, wanted to speak. She had been a teacher in Russia and said "at home no one smiles at me - here everyone smiles all the time".

I was smiling - through my tears. We all hugged and kissed each other and as I told them I didn't speak Russian they spoke to me in Yiddish - shades of my Mom and my Grandma.

Here, too, the workers - and volunteers - are saints. Angels. Women of Valor. And right up there with them belong the Fillipino and Fillipina (male and female) "metaplim" & "metaplot" (caregivers). Many of the people in Israel who can no longer care for themselves employ caregivers. You have never seen such devotion between people - the caregivers and those being cared for. Many of the caregivers have learned to speak Hebrew - how strange to hear them saying "heenay, Mami - tochlee" - (here, sweetheart - eat).

Yes - there are still lots of things we haven't quite gotten right here in Israel - our terrible driving record for one - but I am so proud of what we are doing for our elderly. Mind you - we at MELABEV can only take care of a small percentage of the people who need our help - but, boy, we are really doing something right.

Stay Safe.

Rena

BUT FOR THE GRACE OF G-D

2007-03-18T15:04:00.000+02:00

After ten years of suffering my Mother z"l died five years ago of the effects of Alzheimer's.

She suffered - we suffered - and while it was better for her when she no longer knew who my brother, David, and I were - that's when we suffered the most - when our Mother no longer knew who David and I were.

And there are thousands upon thousands of people in that position - both the people who are afflicted and their loved ones. And for the people who are able to keep their family members at home there is really no respite without groups like MELABEV. Alzheimer's is a twenty-four hour a day punishment - for everyone.

Some years ago I was invited to sit on the Board of the Friends of MELABEV - an organization which runs day-care centers in Jerusalem and Bet Shemesh - a suburb of Jerusalem - for those afflicted with Alzheimer's and other dementias. I wanted to refuse - to decline their request - but how could I? I didn't want to be reminded of the sad time of my Mother's life - of her descent into - well, nothingness is the best way to describe it. I didn't refuse.

Of course, every organization today needs financial help as the government has cut budgets drastically. Our task is to raise money and awareness of who we are. One of the ways we raise money (the good old-fashioned Yiddish word is schnorring) is to run a Virtual Dinner - or as our invitation says "Virtual for Us but Real for Them". We raise money for a "Dinner" - but not the usual Dinner where we get all farpitzed (dressed up), go to a hotel, have a festive meal, listen to speeches, listen to more speeches and go home feeling good about ourselves because we've contributed to a worthy cause.

We raise money and spend it all on the people we want to help. No - you don't go to a dinner. We use the money we raise to run our day-care centers - and to provide a festive meal for the men and women attending our centers. Once a year - just before Pesach - we provide a special lunch or brunch for each of our nine centers - complete with sing-alongs and visiting musicians.

Today was the day for Bet Shemesh. As we do each year - four of us from the Board drove to Bet Shemesh and helped to provide a morning of fun and good food. Shoshana - who runs the center - and her helpers - all volunteers - volunteers mind you - are angels. Saints. Women of Valor. I cannot begin to describe to you just how wonderful and loving and caring they are. They prepared the food - we all helped to serve - and afterwards the singing began.

I started to cry. I left the room. I could see my Mother in each woman's face. Beautiful, once active and vital women. Mothers. Sisters. Wives. Daughters. Grandmothers. I wept. I was so sad. But - I was also happy to be able to share something lovely with them. And not all of the people at the centers are old - that - for me - is an even greater tragedy. They never had the time to finish living their lives. But thanks to the incredible compassion and generosity of the volunteers they can live out their lives with grace and love.

A very sad/happy day, indeed. And on Tuesday we will go to the centers in Jerusalem - and laugh and cry all over again.

Stay Safe.

Rena

FOOD GLORIOUS FOOD

2007-03-15T09:01:00.000+02:00

I was really going to write about something else today - but I just had to tell you of the most wonderful meal I had last night at a restaurant in the "shuk" (market) last night.

When I began shopping at Shuk Machane Yehuda - "the shuk" - more than thirty years ago - it was simply a place to buy good, fresh vegetables, fish, meat, cheeses, appetizings - all kinds of foodstuffs -- unpaved lanes - no covering overhead so that when it rained it rained on you - a bit scruffy if the truth be told - and not particularly frequented by foreign Ashkenazim like me.

Over the years it has been "upgraded" - the streets have been paved - most of the market has a roof now - there is a (very expensive) parking lot leading directly into the shuk - there are some fabulous food stalls - and more recently clothing boutiques and fine restaurants have begun to open. And after all these years I speak Hebrew and I'm as comfortable paying for something in shekels as in dollars --- in the beginning I just pointed to what I wanted and then held out a handful of money for the vendors to take - not a way to live.

So - last night the two R's - or one Rosaline and one Rosalyn (you know them as Roz & Ros) - and I decided to eat at "Tzachko" - arguably one of the best and most fun restaurants I have ever eaten at - and that's really saying something. Let's be real - I've eaten great food - and not so great food - at places ranging from grotty roadside stands in small towns in India to Michelin three-star restaurants - and I'm a real foodie - so I know whereof I speak.

Tzachko is an unpretentious place in the back of the shuk-Iraqi - another section of the market - you have to know where it is to know that you've arrived. The name is actually over the door - the inside door - so that only once you've entered do you know you are there. We were there.

It has a menu which changes daily - and anything can be ordered as either starters or main courses - do what you want. So we did. We ordered seven dishes - from all sections of the menu - had the waiter put everything in the middle of the table - and then we began to "fress".

There is good bread served with little dishes of sea salt, mustard and oil and balsamic vinegar for dipping. And when I asked the waiter if I could have the "neshika" - what we call in Yiddish the "shtreitchikal" - or simply the heel of the bread - that's what I got. Here's what we ate - gnocchi with a pumpkin sauce - lamb kebabs on a bed of eggplant and tehina - goose liver pate with fig jam served with a baby lettuce salad and gorgeous heavy black bread - eggplant on a bed of the most delicious creamy tehina (we love eggplant and tehina if you hadn't guessed) - spicy merguez sausages on a bed of deep-fried onion rings - fresh sardines filled with almonds and swiss chard, breaded and lightly fried - and a "laffa" (sort of a thin focaccia) accompanied by various dips and spreads.

In addition - good wine, reasonably priced - rich non-bitter espresso - great service - a warm buzzing happy ambiance - a perfect evening. And - it's kosher!! Not that I care, mind you - but it was only when Ros asked for milk for her coffee and our waiter said that the restaurant was kosher - that I realized that it was. Interestingly - I didn't notice one "kippa" (yarmulke - skull cap). Which just goes to prove that "kosher" doesn't have to mean heavy, middle-European, greasy food swimming in some sort of unidentifiable gravy.

Eli Mizrachi (who owns the place) and his family have been in the shuk for years. I drink coffee and eat light lunches at his Cafe - I buy my dried fruits and nuts at his brother's stall - and now I eat at my new favorite restaurant - Tzachko. And - in the interest of full disclosure - I did like the fact that he recognized me as a patron of his cafe!

Now - back to my diet.

Stay Safe.

Rena

THE SPRING HAS SPRUNG......

2007-03-10T10:04:00.000+02:00

Do you remember the little poem we used to say as kids? Well - we used to say it as kids --

Da spring has sprung,
Da grass has riz,
I wonder where da flowers is.
Da boids is on da wing - absoid,
I tought da wing was on da boid.

Yesterday - early Friday morning at about 7:00 - Marallyn and I spoke on the phone - and almost at the same moment we began to recite the poem.

And then we realized - spring is almost here. We hadn't been going out for our usual Friday morning breakfast of late - not with any regularity anyway - it was too cold, it was too rainey - we couldn't sit outside under the pergola at our favorite breakfast spot - "Angel's" in Nayot - winter is a time to dig in and stay warm and dry.

And then we noted - the sun was shining - it wasn't bitter cold anymore - it was a day to sit outside and breakfast. And so - "achat, shteim" (one two) - we quickly dressed and by 9 o'clock I picked her up and off we went.

And when we got there - lo and behold - others had had the same idea. The tables were set up under the pergola - people were sitting outside and enjoying the morning - spring had truly arrived.

Our adorable waitress - who hadn't seen us in months - came running over to our table - and asked - "The usual?" We hadn't been forgotten.

So - spring is here. We'll begin Daylight Savings Time at the end of the month. We're beginning to empty out our refrigerators and freezers so we can start anew for Pesach. We're beginning to discuss at great length what we'll cook for Pesach - ridiculous when you think about it as we do the same things every year anyway. Tradition, you know.

And before we have time to realize it Pesach will be here - and Yom HaZicharon (Remembrance Day) and Yom HaShoah (Holocaust Remembrance Day) and - finally - a day to celebrate - Yom HaAtzmaut (Israeli Independence Day).

Have a happy spring.

Stay Safe.

Rena

A PASSAGE TO INDIA or THE RAJ QUINTET - part II

2007-03-06T10:31:00.000+02:00

To paraphrase my friend, Cecelia - who wasn't too thrilled with her trip to India but has had second thoughts upon her return - "we saw cows and monkeys and camels and cows and sarees and elephants and cows and forts and cows and palaces and cows". And cow dung - lots of it. The cow is holy - you know the expression "holy cow" - this is where it must come from. The cows have right of way - always.

I wore my Crocs - those funny looking shoes made of some sort of resin - which are washable. They got washed every night when we came back to the hotel!

It's so strange to be in a city - a big city like Delhi or Mumbai - and to see cows walking in the streets. In Varanasi - which is a very holy city - there are almost more cows than people. I remember walking down a street and talking to Myra - but looking the other way - and I said to her, "Myra, please stop pushing me ". But it wasn't Myra - it was one of the cows - who didn't want to stop pushing me. And me a big city girl at that. What do I know from cows?

In India you go from the sublime to the ridiculous - you traverse centuries in the course of one day. Yes - there is extreme poverty and there are places that are not too clean - is that a diplomatic way of putting it? Especially when you are talking about walking down a street and always - but always - looking down in order to avoid the cow dung. But that same cow dung is used to heat the houses in the small villages we drove through. The dung is formed into patties, left to dry, and the resulting patties are formed into (very pretty) towers in the yards and used as fuel for the stoves and ovens. The same dung is also mixed with paint and used to paint houses. Definitely not our way of life - but it works.

And then you walk into the Taj Mahal Hotel in Mumbai - I always use their restrooms when I am in the neighborhood (a good travel tip - their restrooms are clean and elegant and the hotel is most gracious about strangers coming in for that purpose) which is the height of luxe and modernity and elegance. Walk in the front door - opened by the most fashionable doormen I have ever seen - turn left - walk past the Louis Vuitton display - turn right - up the stairs - and there you are.

We rode in all sorts of conveyances - our ultra-modern Mercedes Benz 9-seater, air-conditioned, 4-wheel drive vehicle -- yes - I know there were only five of us but we do like our comforts. We rode in tuk-tuks - a 3-wheeled vehicle - with handle bars instead of a steering wheel - no doors but a roof - holds three comfortably but I have actually seen 15 people riding in and on it. We rode in bicycle-driven rickshaws and in the yellow and black un-airconditioned Fiat taxis whose meters are so out of date that you have to multiply the amount on them by 14 times the rate shown.

The only conveyance I didn't ride in was a palanquin - a chair affixed to two poles and carried on the shoulders of the men who trudged - countless times a day - up and down 120 very steep and uneven stone stairs to get to the Elephanta Caves. Not because I had anything against being transported by humans in such fashion but because my friends were going by foot and I decided to join them. I was not a happy camper - expecially when I had to walk down - and up - more stairs to get to the loo.

See what I mean about traveling through the centuries in one trip?

Stay Safe.

Rena